talking to the moon//h.s.

15

"did your childhood best friend pass away?" a girl asks as i talk to a fan.

i feel my heart stop as i turn to look at her. how would she know about jasper?

"who told you that?" i ask and she looks like she just saw a ghost.

"don't answer that." my manager shakes her head to the girl and i quickly get the girl's attention again.

"no. where did you hear that?" i ask, pressuring her to tell me.

"keep it moving." my manager pushes the crowd away and i roll my eyes.

it's one thing for these people to call my grandmother but it's another thing to stab an open wound.

•••

as soon as i get home i angrily throw my phone onto my bed and scream. tears begin streaming down my face and my phone vibrates.

hazza:
are you okay?

i read the message and wipe my tears. i don't doubt that he saw the posts about jasper but i honestly don't want to talk to anyone about it.

me:
yeah !! ofc haha

i respond and shake my head, knowing that i'm lying. harry already has so much to deal with so i don't want to add more reasons for him to worry.

"maryah, what's going on?" calum asks, worry in his voice.

"i don't know." i whisper. technically i'm not lying, i'm just not telling the whole truth.

"who are you talking to?" my manager asks, pulling my attention away from calum.

"calum." i respond dryly.

"you're not allowed to talk to him anymore." she shakes her head and my heart sinks.

"what?" i ask, not believing what i just heard.

"that's a new rule we're setting. no soulmates." she shrugs and my jaw drops.

"you can't be serious. he's my childhood best friend-" i argue but she stops me.

"and i'm the milk man. get over it."

•••

"are you okay?" madison asks. we've been hanging out all day but i keep zoning out because i'm exhausted.

"say yes." my manger pokes my side and i give madison a soft smile.

"yeah."

"are you sure?" she asks again, noticing that i'm lying.

"yeah." i blink away the tears and hold myself back from sobbing.

•••

"maryah?" calum asks, he's been talking to me for the past few days but my management has been keeping a close eye on me to make sure i'm not responding. "maryah are you ignoring me?"

"i can't-" i try to explain but my manager snaps at me.

"what did we discuss?" she raises her eyebrows and i quickly apologize.

"sorry."

•••

"maryah can we get a picture with you?" a girl asks as she and her friends wait outside the restaurant.

"yeah of cour-" i smile before management grabs my wrist.

"she's not in the mood."

"i'm sorry." i shake my head, not smiling anymore and the girls stop.

"but you just-" she begins to cry and i feel bad for her.

"i'm sorry." i apologize again before my manager pulls me away.