All for you

Chapter 1

Before I knew it, my eyes were forcefully witnessing the most torturous week of my life. When my head wasn't stuck in the countless tubs of vanilla ice cream filling the freezer whilst I channel surfaced until dawn, the tears rolled down my cheeks in a gentle rhythm as my eyes skimmed through a camera roll which held only my pain. Each passing second seemed longer than the previous, sending my mind into complete overdrive as I questioned the decisions I made.

As my thumb continuously met the glass screen, a gasp of air escaped my lungs at the sight of his toned torso perfectly aligned with mine as our gazes met the camera. With eyes wide and smiles reaching the top of our cheeks, the pixels radiated the happiness we once felt. When everything was so simple.

Moments later, my ears perked up at the sound of my cellphone vibrating against my wrist. The possibility of his name appearing sent a new rush of desperation through me, knowing I wouldn't be able to decline at a single peak at the four letters. Much to my dismay, my parent's names flashed on the screen alongside a picture of the pair id taken years ago. It took three rings for my fingers to reach out and answer the call.

'Hello, Josephine are you there dear' spoke the calming voice of my mother as the muttering of my father played in the background before I replied, 'Hey mum, hey dad'.

'Sweetie its so great to hear from you. How are you? Hows Hero? Is he there, can we say hello?' she rushed out, taking me of guard and forcing all the emotions id kept hidden directly in my face. The sound of glee itself lacing her tone made it impossible for me to be truthful coercing more lies to leave my lips.

'Im fine mum, were both fine' I said pausing as the tears tried to break an entry, 'He's just gone out to get some food for us'. My words seemed to convince my parents on the opposite end of the line as they spent the rest of our conversation throwing out medical advice revolving around the pandemic. Every time his voice was spoken, my entire heart shattered in pain practically begging me to breakdown. Luckily, it was only after the call ended when just that happened. I knew eventually that id have to tell them the truth, that id left my soulmate broken-hearted and basically kicked him to the streets, but that day was not today.

The next morning seemed almost identical to the past 5 days since he left. Waking up wrapped in a T-shirt he left behind whilst my arms clung to the pillow still lingering with his scent. My mind seemed to instantly race to him as soon as my eyes opened, almost as though the nights I spent dreaming about having him close weren't enough. Of course, we'd spent a lot of time apart before, him being in London whilst I switched between Perth and California constantly, but this time was different. This time, I sent the man I loved packing without a kiss goodbye or a promise of next time. This time, I knew he wasn't coming back to me.

My subconscious never failed to remind me of how this was all on me. How Hero never once treated me negatively and was the perfect gentleman throughout the entirety of our relationship. How his words were only that of a drunken state.

The thoughts consuming me took a turn on my stomach, forcing a hand over my lips as the bile rose from the base of my throat. Reaching the toilet just in time, my mouth opened allowing my body to remove its substance as a rush of dizziness washed over me. It wasn't until 20 minutes later that my feet could withstand my weight, allowing me to brush away the taste scarred to my gums and drench the rest of my face in the cool liquid running into the sink.

Walking into the kitchen, I wandered over to the fridge in search of an item to remove the still prominent taste, only to retreat to the living room soon after at the smells being forced on me. Choosing to avoid the concept of food for the next few hours, my legs lay across the couch as I pushed play to the latest series I was binging on Netflix.

The ring of the doorbell is what broke me from my sleeping state, checking the digital clock to see the numbers 5:12 written in bold before a familiar voice broke me out of my trance, 'Jo are you here'. With a rumbling stomach, my hand collided with the handle letting the visitor I knew so well into the hall, taking the bags from her hands emitting such a glorious smell.

'I was getting worried for a minute' the soothing voice of Anna spoke as she placed the remaining bags in her hands down on the counter. 'Sorry, I must have been out cold' I said after her explaining her constant knocking and calling over a 10 minute period, 'I brought Chick-fil-A for you, only if you haven't eaten of course'. The memories of the fast-food place threatened a new set of tears to spill, only being prevented by my hunger and desperation to eat.

'I haven't eaten anything all day actually so I'm starving' I responded taking the plate of glory into my hands before it collided with my lips. As I was savoring each bite, Annas eyes store back at me with a worried glance written over her face.

'I spoke to Hero yesterday' she said, causing my neck to swell as I instantly began chocking on the small bundle of fries I was swallowing, 'He told me everything Jo'. It was those five simple words that sent my emotions rushing down my cheeks, her hands soon looping around my shoulders as her fingers slowly rubbed along the base of my neck.

'I don't know what to do Anna, I just don't know what to do' I said truthfully, leaning my body into her completely as my every muscle fell weak.