All for you

Chapter 4

'I- I don't understand that's not possible' I finally announced lying through my teeth to both myself and the doctor, 'we always used protection'.

'Unfortunately, miss Langford, not a single contraceptive we currently have available can guarantee you 100% safety' he said in a much calmer tone strikingly opposing my own.

As I thought back over the past few months, I began realizing how careless we had some times been. For instance, when he visited back in December after a hefty time apart, my hands practically tore his clothes in half before we'd even exited the hallway. Our typical use of protection nowhere in sight.

I knew there had been several occasions where we'd been to caught up in the moment to think, too caught up in the moment to consider possible outcomes. The barrier methods weren't at fault here, Hero and I's uncontrollable lust for each other was.

'Now Miss Langford I know this may be coming as a surprise but we do have several options available for you moving forward' he spoke as heartbroken tears unwillingly rolled down my cheeks.

His words from then on were barely comprehendible as my brain absorbed the facts. I was pregnant. I was carrying a part of Hero and I in my body, a part of our collided DNA forming more with each passing day. A baby, an actual baby.

'I-I have to go' I suddenly responded before rushing to my feet giving him not a single second to throw out any more life-changing words.

As protests from several workers about my exit washed out in the background, my arms collided with the final door blocking me from the fresh air I so desired. With tears now streaming down my face at a paste I couldn't register, my eyes met the ones of the women so concerned about my sorry state.

Within seconds, my body convulsed as her arms wrapped around my useless bones. To onlookers, the vision would be a sight for sore eyes, but not for a second was my mind considering the public's reaction to my breakdown.

'Come of Jo, let's go back to the car yeah?' she questioned my broken state after 5 minutes of my face digging deep into her collarbone. With a quick nod sending more tears plummeting to the ground, the arms of my best friend wrapped tightly around my shoulders as she guided me towards the parked vehicle.

Opening my door with a single-arm, she began manipulating my movements before finally situating me in the front passenger seat. Before I knew it, her palms were steadily guiding us out of the lot as silence absorbed the entirety of the car, the soft sounds normally flowing out of the radio not evident replicating the state of the mumbling usually escaping Hallie's lips.

Due to consistent waves of negativity my mind was throwing at me face on, the car drive seemed short as my arms were soon meeting the cushion Hallie's feet lay on earlier. My vision soon pictured my roommate copying the previous actions I had taken, her arms folding in a manner which I knew meant words would soon be flowing out of her drawn mouth.

'What happened Jo?' she finally spoke ending the painful atmosphere which allowed so much pain to curse my head, 'Is something seriously that wrong?'

Her painful tone continued as more worry replaced the oxygen floating around the space, 'whatever it is Jo, I'll be here for you. No matter what's going on we'll get thro-'

'Im pregnant' I cut in simply as my bloodshot eyes store forward not gazing at anything in particular before moving to see her shocked expression, 'im pregnant Hallie'.

Her eyes widened in a way my own did hours ago at the same news, her chin lose displaying her well kept set of teeth whilst her nose flared in a way which seemed atypical for her personality.

'What the fuck' she finally announced after a silence that seemed to have lasted hours when in reality, it had only been a matter of minutes.

'How can you be pregnant Jo? How didn't you notice your period being late or your fucking body changing? How the fuck did I not realize?'

'Hallie, my periods have always been irregular' I simply responded choosing to ignore the other questions she seemed so curious about. The reality was, I too didn't know how I'd failed to realize the adaptations taking to my figure as it began preparing to house a mini version of Hero and myself.

'Im scared Hallie, I'm so damn scared' I croaked as the tension slowly began rising in the room for a second time since we'd arrived home.

At my words, her entire body seemed to relax as not a single word more was shared between us. Words could wait, people could wait, even this baby could wait for me as I finally gave in by letting my self go, brushing my head against Hallie's bony lap trenching her pants with tears.

For the next hour, all I did was lay down staring upwards at the ceiling as my emotional state continued to break. Each second seemed all the more bitter as a new thought found a way to swim through my ears ruining the small amount of positivity I had already struggled to grip. The sound of my parents ringing through my cellphone seemed almost nonexistent as not a muscle in my body chose to move, knowing I couldn't possibly speak in my current state.

'Hey Jo hunny, I'm really sorry but your head's digging right into one of the few bones I need in my day to day life and I think it's about to break' she said in her sarcastic manner which brought a small smirk to my lips.

Moving my head, a sigh of relief left her lungs and her arm carefully brushed over the spot id clearly brought pain to whilst she began talking again, 'Im gonna start dinner, ok?'.

With a grateful nod from myself, we both began taking off in different places as I decided a much-needed nap was necessary with the comfort of my sheets with the pillows still lingering with his scent.

Before completely giving in to my tiredness, I found my current desire for the man I so desperately needed in my current predicament getting the best of me. Ignoring the several missed calls displayed on the screen from both my parents and Anna, my thumb instantly collided with the app I'd failed to ever use a lot.

Typing in his profile name I loved so much at a furious rate, my eyes lit up at the sight of his black and white photo he had chosen to match to my own previous. Skimming through each individual photo, I found myself zooming in to each feature visible upon his perfectly sculptured face.

His lips, so kissable even through the screen.

His eyes, looking delicate holding the colour which had secretly become my favourite.

His dimples, an attribute I prayed my future child would have.

Before letting myself absorb the threatening tears which were trying so desperately to drown me again, my eyes skimmed across the tagged button which I'd only clicked on my own profile once or twice.

Without a second thought, my finger carefully collided with the small symbol placed on his page ruining me with only one press. Rows and rows of the same exact photo lay carelessly as his eyes failed to meet my'n every time.

The only evidence being the outline of his face and the two arms previously belonging to my neck now belonging to hers. Her body sat on top of the place I'd become so accustomed to as smiles outlined both their cheeks with her cuddled up to his skin as closely as possible.

He looked so happy, they looked so happy. It had only been a few weeks since his departure yet he'd already moved on.

The thought alone sent bile rising from my gullet as I ran to the toilet, the image failing to remove itself from my vision even when my lips met the bowl.