All for you

Chapter 5

Hero's POV

Fourteen days.

The exact amount of time since the one I dreamed of someday soon becoming my wife kicked me to the curb, shattering my soul into two halves and destroying every ounce of hope I once had.

Her words seemed so easy for her, the proclaims of not loving me sounding natural from her plump lips as if our entire relationship had never been a vision imaged in her future. But her face, her entire perfectly sculptured skin seemed pained contrasting each syllable that left her mouth. I will never understand the facial expressions evident on that day, but the one thing I do recognize, the one thing I know for certain is that every moment we shared leading up to the torturous occasion meant nothing to her.

After returning back to London, my everyday replicated the one previous as my state of misery only seemed to worsen with each passing second. Over the course of the two weeks, my biggest accomplishments were the few phone calls i'd managed to share with Anna without breaking down entirely.

I knew I shouldn't desire every small detail I could possibly grasp about Jo's current life but I couldn't help it. My mind wandered to her each passing day, considering how she was living presently.

Was she glad I was gone?

Had she already moved on?

Did she ever love me?

My hand rested on my forehead at the thoughts racing behind the thin layer of skin, each finger steadily grazing through my roots as my eyes glanced towards the digital clock. Despite the time showing quarter to two, I had yet to make any movements as the very idea of it hurt my own muscles.

'That's it, get the fuck up' said the sudden voice of Felix as he rammed my door open before proceeding to open each set of curtains forcing light into my vision. Placing the quilt over my eyes blocking out the unwanted brightness, I was soon thrust up into a sitting position as my best mates fist collided with my bicep.

'Shit Felix, get the fuck out you dick' I screamed as the pain gradually began subsiding to a point where I could release my pent up anger towards his frame.

'Nah mate I ain't gonna do that' he responded with his arms crossed over his chest with a smug look laying on his face, 'Now get up bro'.

'I don't exactly feel like getting up Felix so just do me a favour and leave me the fuck alone'

'Mate, I get that Jo broke your heart, I really do, but you can't just lay in bed all day' he started with a look of pity clear in his eyes, 'Its been almost 2 weeks since you got back and I doubt you even remember what the outside world looks like'

'I don't give a fuck about what this 'outside world' you speak so highly of looks like' I said honestly as his presence was beginning to piss me off more by the second, 'And why do you care so bloody much, I ain't doing shit all to affect you'

'That's it, I tried the easy way so now ill try the hard way' he spoke walking out of my room forcing a breath of relief to leave my lungs before being disappointed upon his return only seconds later.

'What are you doing now you little fuck' I shouted as his fingers started furiously colliding with the screen attached to his phone.

'Calling Mrs FT' he announced nonchalantly as if it was normal for him to be calling my mother at such an unnecessary time

'No your fuckin not, she doesn't even know I'm home yet you dick' I said immediately grabbing the phone from his wrist and forcing his body away from the edge of my duvet with full force.

'Ahhh, that's one way to move get you moving. Now get dressed, you ain't gonna want to miss what's about to happen in there' he said pointing towards the space only meters away from my door as his legs guided him through the metal hinges.

'Lanky bastard' I spoke under my breath before finally taking my first unrequired steps in weeks.

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'ahhh, Look what the cat dragged in' came the annoyingly high pitched squeal of the female roommate I was unfortunate enough to share my flat with.

'Yeah, it's fucking awful to see you too' I sarcastically announced back at Elle as I slouched down on the sofa which suddenly seemed more appealing than ever before.

It was only when my eyes reopened from thinking about the same scenario that seemed to control my head that I noticed the bottles of liquor placed all over the surrounding area. With shot glasses jotted all around, my eyes zoned in on the one beverage I'd always been so tempted by as the washed-out voices of my roommates continued in the background.

'What's all this shit for?' I questioned unbothered by the fact I'd clearly cut in on their ongoing conversation.

'This, my friend, is a sign that its time to get your head out of the fucking clouds mate and live a little' responded Felix as he obnoxiously patted my shoulder before walking over to the kitchen followed by the high pitched annoyance.

Laying back, every thought I'd managed to push away for my longest time since leaving California rushed back at me in a harsh sudden wave. Her lips I'd touched on countless occasions seemed scarred to my brain as her sparkling eyes followed in the same footsteps. Every facial feature I'd once underestimated seemed sacred, as if at any moment they would turn on me in the exact same way she'd previously done.

It's crazy how fast everything changed. How one minute I was searching with Hallie and Katherine for an engagement ring I desired to be placed on her finger and in the next, the only word I could refer to her as was my ex.

The very thought had me grabbing the bottle of Jack Daniels which had been cruelly eyeballing me the whole time before my gut received the great flame which seemed to hinder my pain.

It felt like only seconds had past before half of the bottle was empty, my lungs filling up with the beverage as the sound of the doorbell sang in the background.

'Let's get this shit started' I heard the voice of Morgz scream before what seemed like my entire street pilled into the small space.

Normally in this situation, I'd jump to my feet telling them all how fucking stupid they were for trying to party during a pandemic. How dumb they all were for risking everything to get shit drunk.

But not today, not after the love of my life stomped on my heart.

Not after I realized how soothing the taste of whiskey could actually be.

Before I knew it, I found myself in the exact state I was desperate for. My vision blurry as the shots tasted similar to water as they slid easily down my throat. I needed this, I needed so badly to escape my harsh reality and I was finally doing it.

As my eyes gazed around the room, a presence on my lap made itself know. Her hips instantly grinding across my lower area as her filthy claws drew shapes down the back of my spine.

'Hey Hero' she spoke in a seductive manner which made me want to vomit and scream at the same time. The thoughts of throwing her straight of my lap were clear in my mind, but the thoughts of what Jo could potentially be doing put a stop to the very idea.

Without another word muttered, I continued to drink my soul away with an irritatingly hormonal woman sitting on my lap.

As she wafted her phone around in the air, I took no notice of the photos she was so obviously taking.

I took no notice of how the internet would react after seeing her body so linked to mine.

I took no notice of how much damage I could potentially push on the one I would never stop loving.