Loving Him Even In Sadness

Loving: Fifteen

Emergency

I and Zack sat down in front of the sea after our breakfast. He told me that he had the table and food prepared. We ate and talked quickly in the table bago kami umupo sa harap ng dagat. It is still so hot because of the sun. Sobrang init.

Hinubad ni Zack ang kanyang button down shirt. I was so sure he would take a dip in the sea, but he didn’t.

Instead, nilagay niya ang shirt sa likod ko. It occupied from my right across my left shoulder. I didn’t feel any harsh sunlight grazing my skin because of it.

I looked at him and smiled. “Thank you,” I told him, almost a whisper.

“Anything for you, Zen.”

Paano siya? It is hot!

“Baka ikaw naman ang mainitan? Let’s go under the trees, Zack,” suhestiyon ko.

“You cared for me now?” He asked wanting so much for my affection.

“I always do.” I told him.

We stared at each other and it stretched for more seconds. Kung hindi dahil sa tawag ay hindi siguro mapuputol iyon.

***

Should I panic? No! Should I remain calm? Obviously I can’t. How can I calm when it’s my family who’s at stake. Fuck this!

“I’m sorry if you have to go home with me, this is an emergency,” maiiyak na sabi ko sa kanila habang nasa sasakyan kami.

Mom called saying they rushed Ate Zia to the hospital. Hindi ko alam ano’ng gagawin, hindi rin sinabi bakit. Mom was just supposed to let us stay there pero hindi ko kaya na nandito ako at nagsasaya pero ang kapatid ko nandoon sa hospital.

“Zen what happened?” Tanong ni Alex pero hindi ako makasagot panay lang ang iyak at laro ko sa daliri ko.

Nanginginig ang aking balikat kahihikbi. Wala na ako sa aking sarili. Paano na lang kung may mangyaring masama kay Ate? Hindi ko kakayanin.

Iyak ako nang iyak nang may humawak sa balikat ko at marahan itong hinaplos. At first I found it awkward pero kalaunan nagiging komportable ako.

“Everything will be fine,” sabi ni Zack.

Sana nga Zack! Sana nga.

Ganoon ang aking eksena hanggang nakauwi na kami sa Cebu proper.

Panay pa rin ang hikbi ko. Hindi ko na pinauwi sa bahay ang mga kasama ko, diretso na kami sa hospital at mula sa hospital tsaka ko na sila pinauwi.

“You sure you are fine here? We can stay Zen,” sabi ni Liam noong sinabi kong pwede na silang umuwi.

“I will be fine Liam. My family is here,” sagot ko rin sa kanya.

Bago sila tuluyang umalis, they all give me a tight hug! They all waved goodbye as I watched them drove back home by our driver. Hinugot ko ang cellphone sa aking bulsa at tinawagan si Mommy at sinabing nasa hospital na ako. I asked kung nasaan sila, nang sinabi ni Mommy na nasa ICU si Ate agad akong napaupo sa sahig.

“Ma? Ano ba’ng nangyari? Ano’ng sakit na diagnose bakit nasa ICU agad?!” Pasigaw na tanong ko kay Mommy habang umiiyak.

“No, it’s nothing serious Ze –”

“Bullshit! Nothing serious pero nasa ICU! Ma, don’t fool me. Just tell me! Please Mom,” I begged just to know the truth kasi ayaw niya sanang sabihin sa akin.