🩹scared | taegyu

🩹thirty-eight

if you have a question, you should find out the answer

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

*** *** **
hi beomgyu.
taehyun is very sick today,
so i don't think you should drop by to tutor him. i'm worried he'll infect you.
have a nice day, from hyejin 💕

- 

taehyun lies stiffly on the sofa. he's watching Animal Planet and contemplating whether or not he should just end it all. he hears his mum sigh, he knows she hates to lie. but sometimes, only sometimes, she has to do it to protect her baby. and she knows beomgyu has broken her kid, he definetly can't come over today. or ever. 

"i've told seulgi you're sick." she says, adjusting her coat in the large mirror in the hallway. 

"mhm-" taehyun hums, wiping his watery eyes. even the elephants are in love. why am i the only one who's being hurt? why is it just my heart that's broken?

"raindrop, call me if you need me and stay off the sweets. and don't talk to strangers knocking on the door." hyejin says, hurrying over to him to kiss his cheek. he smiles and waves her goodbye from the sofa. 

"and definetly don't watch riverdale!" taehyun laughs. and watches his mum hurry out the door, with her shoelaces untied and a stray hair in the back of her neck fly everywhere. she's late today, because of me. 

as soon as the door slams shut and she leaves in her car, taehyun's smile falters. and he instantly bursts out into tears as an elephant pats her trunk against her baby. he already misses his mommy. 

taehyun doesn't know what's wrong. there are too many wrong things at the moment. everything is cluttered in his head. he can't marie kondo his way out of this. but there's one think he knows for sure, this is all beomgyu's fault. 

"i had to fall in love with him out of all people." taehyun scoffs loudly, sitting up as he wipes the tears off his cheeks.

 "mr. i'll steal your first kiss but act like it's a fucking sin thirty seconds later." he throws himself back down on the sofa, kicking his feet around like a five year old. his sadness turns into anger. 

taehyun throws a tantrum. crying angry tears as he throws the pillows on the sofa around the living room. throwing the magazines around, kicking his feet, screaming out in frustration. throwing his glass of water into the wooden floor. he watches it shatter everywhere.  

angrily jumping up and down, he doesn't know what to do with himself. everything hurts, he feels hopeless. unsure whether to cry, laugh or continue screaming. taehyun lays down on the floor, exhausted. 

i'm so fucking weak. he looks at the mess next to him. smashed glass and wet pillows. the anger turns into regret. "why did i have to make such a mess?" 

he sits up with a sigh, leaning across the floor to the pile of clothes on the living room chair. taehyun wipes a towel across the wet floor. listening as the glass crunches into the floor boards.

he remembers that sound, only bad memories come from broken glass. taehyun gets and urge to pick up a piece of his shattered glass. he clutches it in his hand. feeling the shard dig into his palm. it feels almost relieving. 

but then his regret turns into pain. the glass stops feeling relieving, instead it's just painful. and a wave of fear washes over him. what if i do something stupid? what if i do something stupid?!

taehyun's eyes are wide with worry as he jumps up from the floor. he grabs his phone from the coffee table and locks himself in the bathroom. he selects the number he isn't used to calling and waits for the one he feels like he needs to most to answer. the person he thinks understands him the most right now.