Remember Me, Mi Amore

32

It was our third anniversary today. It was the day before I will... I swallowed the word that was supposed to be at the end of that sentence. Every time that it was just nearing, it's getting harder for me to do that, to say the word.

I decided to just ate at a dinner place. Like the one where we celebrated our second-anniversary. Forsythe let me decide also.

I entangled my fingers with his. This may be the last time that the bones of our fingers will fit each other perfectly. This may be the last time that I will feel his palm clinging onto mine too.

My head turned into Forsythe who was quiet. Normally, he would talk to me. But this time, he didn't. I clenched my fingers onto him just to grab his attention. Which I did. He stole a little glance at me and looked at the road after.

"Is there a problem? Ang tahimik mo." I said to him as I stared at his jaw.

"Wala naman. Ikaw ba may problema?" He then asked me.

"Nothing, I don't have a problem. As long as I'm with you, I don't have one." As I said to him, saying nothing but the truth.

He stole a glance at me once again and smiled a little. After that, what followed was a long silence. But it was fine. Because the silence was something that shouldn't bug my mind like a record player that was broken. Because the silence was something that envelops me into a warm hug and makes my heart flutter.

Forsythe pulled a seat for me. I sat there with a smile on my face and after I settled myself in, he settled himself too. He picked the table where you can see the outside as it was near the huge window. It was breathtaking to see how the lights sparkle outside and the lights that came from the cars. But my breath figuratively was taken away when my eyes found Forsythe's eyes and I found out that he was looking at me this entire time too.

But behind those eyes, I could see all the trouble that his minds are troubling him. I could very well see it. Especially the chaos of it all.

"My dumi ba sa face ko?" I asked him. I just wanted to get that thing out of his head. I just don't want him to have trouble right now. I know if I will ask him what's wrong with him or the troubles that are troubling him, he would avoid his eyes at me then rolled a lie out of his tongue.

"Wala," he said as he shook his head, "nasabi ko na ba sayo na ang ganda mo ngayon?" He asked me with the same eyes. He's avoiding the question. He's lying.

He didn't make my heart flutter because of his compliments to me. He made it hurt because he was lying to me. Why can't he just tell me that something is wrong with him? Why can't he just say that he has a problem? Why can't he just say that he has a lot of troubles in his mind right now? Why can't he just say that?

Unable to talk because of the fact that I know he's lying to me and I don't know how to react, I just nodded my head at him then drank the water that was in front of us. Luckily, there was one.

This wasn't the first time that he lied to me. And this wasn't the first time I lied to him either. He must know that every time we both do this, we always caught each other on our web. I secretly sighed. Oh, Forsythe.

"Dahan-dahan naman," he suddenly said. That's the time that it dawned on me that I haven't put down the glass that contains water. I must have thought about what was bothering him too much, that I forgot where my reality is. "Busog ka na ata sa tubig 'a. Inubos mo na kasi ng isang lagukan 'yan," he was blabbering those words while he contains his laughter but sometimes the containment isn't enough as chuckles were out of his mouth.