Remember Me, Mi Amore

40

I try to make my moving sounds minimal in the ears. I walked like I'm someone who did a really bad thing and I laid myself in bed quiet as a mouse. It's three in the morning and 'yung anak ko ay dilat na dilat pa din 'yung mata.

Hindi ko akalain na ganito pala kahirap ang magkaroon ng anak. It's so hard to do this thing. Every time he cries I just felt like giving up and have a mental breakdown right there. But I can't. Because I'm a mom now. A mother. My kids first before myself. But all of the hard works and sweats ay worth it pagdating sa baby mo.

My eyelids are giving up on me and my mouth had suppressed a very tired yawn. Ramdam ko na ang antok kaya naman pinikit ko na ang mata ko. When my eyes are tightly shut, I put my arms around my husband and hugged him tight like I always do.

I could feel myself slowly drifting into the real world when my baby's cry echoed the whole room again. My eyes became wide awake again. But, pinikit ko ang mata ko sabay bangon mula sa pagkakahiga.

Tumayo na ako mula sa pagkakahiga ko ng biglang hawakan ni Forsythe ang kamay ko. My eyes got big because of the sudden movement and the sudden rush that ran towards my brain reminding me that my husband was awake. He should be asleep right now because he just told me at the dinner table that he was so tired at his work.

"Ako na bahala kay Steel..." with his sleeping voice he said that to me and his tone was pleading me to go back to sleep. He also held my hand.

I sighed before moving my head up and down as an answer. Pagod na din kasi ako. Kanina ko pa siya pinapatulog pero iyak lang nang iyak. Gosh, I have never felt a good night sleep ever since he was born.

One by one, each by each, Forsythe let go of my fingers. Bumalik naman na ako sa pagkakahiga ko. I just found myself drifting away into dream land quickly because my head laid on my soft pillow.

Napadilat ang mata ko dahil panibagong araw na naman ang haharapin. It's because I could also felt the sun's shine in the morning in my skin.

When I opened my eyes, sumalubong sa akin ang mukha ng asawa ko. He still had that forehead that always creases because the mechanism on his brain is working. It had a few wrinkles here and there, but he still looked handsome despite that. He still also has those eyebrows that I always admire and when he shots them upwards, the similarity between him and his twin are blurred. He still has those lips that would kiss in my forehead after telling me that he's gonna go away from work.

While my eyes are set on him, suddenly his eyes opened slowly. Those deep eyes that always look at me with his beating heart appearing in them. Those eyes that always look at me like I'm one of the things that he couldn't trade anything of, even if it's the most valuable piece on earth. Those eyes that looks into mine and kept screaming that I'm one of his precious.

A smile spread across my lips as I wandered at his morning eyes. I remember the first time our brown tantalizing orbs met as husband and wife. Strands of memories came into my mind like a knot of emotions. The walking on the red carpet... The flowers near the pew... Him, standing near the altar... Me, holding the bouquet tightly...

But those reminiscing came to a halt. Suddenly, my baby's cry echoed across the room again. I almost rolled my eyes because of the momentum that he ruined. Forsythe laughed because of what his son did. He got up from his laying down on the bed at sinuot niya 'yung tsinelas niya then walked to his son's crib.

I also got up from my bed. I kick-start the morning with a smile on my face. I brushed my teeth and walked down to our kitchen to prepare breakfast for our family.

What a life. If someone had told me back then, that the person who invited me to eat will be the one I will build a family with, I wouldn't believe them. If someone told me that I will be in love with my best friend, I wouldn't believe them. I would've said 'No, I'm gonna find a better man in Italy! I'm not marrying Forsythe!'. Turns out, I didn't need a better man. Because I got a greater one and his name is Forsythe. Turns out, I didn't need to go to Italy to find someone who I will marry, he's here. Right now. In front of my eyes. His name is Forsythe.