Gone with the Wind (Upper East Side Two)

Chapter Thirty-Five

35 - Someone

He knelt in front of me, his left knee pressed on the floor. His eyes were hopeful, but it is also glistening. I looked away.

Napapiksi ako nang hawakan niya ang mga kamay ko na nakapatong sa hita ko. Huli na nang bawiin iyon at naramdaman ang marahang paghalik na binigay niya sa mga iyon.

"Thalia..." Napakalambing na boses ang narinig ko. Ang sakit. Ang sakit sa puso.

I bit my lip to suppress myself from crying. Ramdam ko na rin ang pagnginig ng labi ko dahil sa pagpipigil ko.

"Baby, I'm sorry." His voice cracked, and I just felt my tears couldn't stop streaming down my face.

I saw him leaned in and reached my face. Ang init na binibigay ng hawak niya ay mas lalo lang nagpapasakit sa akin.

I was fooled by those gestures from him before. I hoped in everything he did, I dreamt... Masyado akong umasa pero nauwi lang rin sa wala.

I just keep on breaking while seeing him. Gusto ko na lang lumayo para makalimutan na lang siya at ang sakit na idinulot niya.

With my shaking lips and breaking heart, I mustered my courage to look at him. His eyes were bloodshot and still glistening.

Ayaw kong isipin na luha iyon dahil hindi nababagay sa kanya. Hindi nararapat sa kanya na umiyak dahil nasasaktan siya...

Pinalis ko ang luha ko kahit patuloy pa rin sila sa pagbagsak para mas maayos siyang tignan. Ito na iyong pagkakataon kong titigan siya.

Huli na ito. Siguro sa pagdaan ng panahon hindi na sakit ang mararamdaman ko habang tinitignan siya.

"Baby, I'm sorry. Stop crying, please... I hate to see you cry, and I hate myself more that I am the one behind those tears..." Mababang boses niya.

I shook my head to remove his hands on my face. But, it was no avail. Nanatili pa rin iyon at ramdam ko pa rin ang init na hatid nito.

"I was blinded by how I'm crazy in love with you that I forgot to remember that I am the only one who loves. The only one who chases. So, why are you still here when in the first place you asked me to let you go."

"Baby, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."

He held my face gently I almost swayed... Ito iyon eh. Iyong hawak na ayaw mo nang bumitaw. Iyong hawak na kahit mapagod ka man ay hindi ka kakalas.

"Puro ka na lang sorry. Wala nang magagawa 'yang sorry mo." Halos tumaas ang boses ko dahil doon. I'm too tired hearing sorries from the person who hurt me.

It's too late for him to say his sorry. Siguro kung noon ay maaaring napatawad ko pa siya. Maaaring nakalimutan ko pa ang mga nangyari noon. Pero hindi ngayon... Masyado na akong nasasaktan para magpatawad pa...

I saw him bit his lip, trying to stifle himself, unleashing his real emotions. His eyes were slowly flashing what he really feels right now.

"I am done now. I know it will be hard, but I'll live my life without you in it. You can be free again. You can breathe now without me." Kita ko ang pagkatigil niya doon at nagsimulang umiling.

"Don't leave me, please... baby. I'm sorry."

Bakit lagi na lang siyang nagsosorry? Wala nang magagawa ang sorry niya. It was too late.

"If you're here just to ask for forgiveness and apologize, keep it to yourself because I don't want to hear it. You've had your chance, too many, in fact."

I was shocked when I saw tears coming out from his eyes. Hindi ko lubos maisip na iiyakan ako ni Zavi. That he'll shed a tear just for me.

I am no important to him. He just fooled me. And now... he'll act that way. Hindi ko lubos maisip na kaya niyang maging mahina sa harap ko para lang paluguran ang nais niya.