𝕄𝕠𝕠𝕟𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕕 [little!RM/K.NJ] (DISCONTINUED)

2. Your Secret is Safe With Me...

"J-Jinnie?" Namjoon asked, clearly panicking. His voice was octaves higher and his lip was quivering. He quickly grabbed the pacifier from his mouth and hid it under the sheets, as it Seokjin didn't see it. His eyes were wide and stared at Seokjin, pleading for him not to ask and not to tell anyone else, like a child who's been caught.

Seokjin stared at the younger member in confusion, his jaw slack. He blinked once, then twice at the bizzarre scene in front of him.

"'Jinnie?' Namjoon, you know my name. Why are you talking like that?"Seokjin asked, confused. Namjoon was clearly upset, his eyes watery and his face flushed. Seokjin sighed and reasoned that he probably had his reasons and that he should leave him be. He really didn't understand what the hell he just saw, but left it there and didn't pry further.

He left the room and ran a hand through his hair, truly baffled at what had happened. As he walked down the stairs, he thought of what to tell the guys when he reached the Upper House.

Namjoon is... uh...

He isn't feeling well right now...? 

Is that the cover story he's going for? Would they all believe him?

Namjoon probably had his reasons for doing this, he reasoned. Why else would he be curled up like a baby?

He looked pretty upset, actually.

He decided against talking about it to anyone, not even Namjoon. He wasn't going to ask questions he didn't want the answer to, that's for sure. As he walked across the field and to the Upper House, he spotted the other members, who waved and smiled at him, all but Yoongi, who sat boredly.

"Seokjin-hyung?" Jimin asked politely, stretching and yawning due to him just waking up. He flipped his brown hair from his face and looked at Seokjin with narrowed, innocent eyes. "Where is Namjoon?"

Seokjin looked down. "He's... not really feeling well. Said he needed time alone or something like that..."

"Huh! Weird, he seemed okay when he went to bed earlier!" Hoseok remarked, animating his hands as he spoke. Seokjin shrugged and sat, looking at the food Yoongi made earlier.

——— 🖤 ———

"Jinnie knows! No! No!" Namjoon babbled to himself worriedly, when the door closed and the coast was clear. He wanted to cry, but wiped away the potential tears. The secret he'd kept for years... broken. Someone knows now, and that was upsetting.

Really upsetting.

He grabbed the pacifier clumsily from under the sheets and sniffled, holding back crying. What was he supposed to do now?

Namjoon babbled nonsensical words to himself, while putting the pacifier back in the backpack. He knew he shouldn't have brought it! It was nothing but trouble! 

He grabbed his phone, which he fumbled with, to look at the time, which read "7:46 pm". The sun had gone down and only a sliver of a yellow sky sat on the horizon. 

"Otay..." He whispered to himself, sitting on the floor and absentmindedly playing with his feet. "Chu has to be big boy nows, Joonie! Come ons!"

He shook his head and tried thinking big thoughts, forcing himself out of littlespace. He got up from the floor a few minutes later, in the right mindset. He looked out of his window to see the others at the table

He couldn't shake the feeling that Seokjin told them. But he wouldn't, right? He's too considerate! But still...

Namjoon still panicked, but straightened out his clothes. He walked down the stairs and out of the door of the main house, nearly stumbling and tripping over the shoes at the door, and bumping into the ping pong table.

He spotted the boys again and ran up the stone laced driveway to the Upper House. He jogged to the table, where the group sat laughing and stuffing their faces, not really noticing him. Namjoon took a deep inhale and slammed his hands on the table, gaining the attention of the group members, who turned to him with startled faces.

"Namjoon-hyung! You're feeling bette-"

"It's not what you think!" Namjoon yelled, outstretching his hands in front of him defensively. The table was completely silent before bursting out and crying in laughter. Namjoon's heart dropped to the floor and his stomach felt like a bottomless pit.

They know, don't they?

Dammit, Jin! I knew they'd act like this!

Fuck, don't cry Joonie-

I mean, Namjoon.

I... shit-

"I'm so, so sorry..." He begun to get choked up, hearing his voice crack. "I knew you'd act like-"

"Relax, dude. If you were watching porn again, who really cares, you pervert!" Jimin wiggled his eyebrows and teased playfully.

Yoongi smirked. "Not feeling well, my ass." He mumbled. Namjoon sighed a sigh of relief.

So, they don't know. Oh my god, that's a relief.

Namjoon felt some weight off of his shoulders, but not completely. He eyed Seokjin, who didn't look back at him. 

He knows. What now?

Namjoon sat down with the rest of the group, who continued to talk and honestly, not even paying attention to him. He wasn't even really hungry anymore, just tired and worried. Namjoon kept suspiciously eyeing Seokjin, who was focused more on food.

Maybe if we both ignore it, he's not gonna have any more questions. You know what? I'm not gonna ask him, he won't ask me. It'll sort itself out.

Namjoon sighed and looked at the open sky with an odd feeling still in his chest. 

I hope so...