All That I Really Wanted (English Version)

Now

Landon's hand trembled when he raised it to knock on the door. He had difficult days, then he had gone to the only place where he had felt at home, looking at that kind smile, the love in those blue eyes when they landed on him.

He wanted to see Hope. He knew the girl was back had confirmed that after going with MG.

He knocks on the vampire's door and a few seconds later MG opened the door with a wide smile.

"Landon, hello man, come in"

The boy smiled in warm welcome, he had barely entered when he looked at the diaper bag on the vampire's desk.

MG followed his gaze and smiled.

"Yeah, I decided I needed to have one here for when Lizzie brings the babies. Trust me bro, you don't want to be caught unprepared "

Each word felt like a stab, but he forced himself to focus. Noticing the blue blanket on the side of the diaper bag.

"what are their names?"

MG sighed and he could see the sorrow in his eyes as he answered.

"Andrew and Lucas or Andy and Luke if you ask Lizzie"

Landon nodded, looking around. MG had a pile of old movies with a blue rattle on top. A laundry basket on the floor revealed men's clothing along with a small baby set, and on the desk was a baby bottle. Hope's babies were obviously a big part of MG's life.

Landon wondered if MG would be that close if those were his children with Hope.

"Look Landon, I know this is not easy for you, man, but I'm here if you want to talk"

The boy raised his hand.

"I'm well. We've both move on "

"Well then why don't we go downstairs, find something to eat and play video games for a bit?" suggested the vampire.

"No, I really don't have time, I need to do something with Raf" he lied "but it's still standing, the trip to your house this weekend?"

"Of course, that hasn't changed," assured the vampire.

"Perfect" he walked to the door and out.

The door opened, pulling him out of his thoughts. Hope's surprised face greeted him.

"Landon?"

"Hi"

"What are you doing here?" Hope asked surprised, it was past midnight and she was cooing to Luke when Landon knocked on her door.

"may I come in?"

"Yeah sure" she let him pass and then closed the door "just don't make noise Josie and Andy are asleep" she indicated to the bed, where the brunette was sleeping with a baby curled up in her. "Between school and the babies, she's very tired"

The boy nodded trying not to imagine in all the things that the brunette had, all the things that he didn't know he had wanted until it was too late. And all that she had with Hope.

Landon looked at the baby in Hope's arms. His small golden eyes with green hues and the thin layer of light copper hair.

"he's beautiful"

Hope smiled happily.

"I think he is"

Landon cleared his throat.

"Hope, one of the reasons I came here is that I wanted to apologise for what happened last time."

In his heart he knew she had been right, but he hated the distance she had created between them. So, he could lie to close the gap.

Hope looked at him nervously and pulled Luke closer to her. Her son looked at her with big, serious eyes, as if he wanted to know what she'll do next. Hope didn't know what to do, she felt guilty even for being in the same room with Landon after what happened last time. But if the boy was really apologizing, she couldn't hold it against him. Then she smiled.

"It's okay, Landon. You were going through a lot and it's easy to hold onto the comfort of the past. Believe me I have done it too "

The boy swallowed his anger feeling that his feelings were so easily dismissed.

"and now?"

"Now I have something that ties me to the future" she smiled at the boy in her arms who was struggling to stay awake.

"may l..?" He asks. He hadn't wanted to. He was sure he would do anything to prevent it, but now, for reasons he couldn't explain, he wanted to hold him. The baby almost asleep, he moved when they changed arms, but calmed down once more. He marvelled at the small body in his arms. "He is a good boy"

"Yes, he is," Hope agreed with a smile.

As Landon held the little baby, the lines of reality blurred, giving him what his heart desired, a truth that was not his. Give him this life.

This little boy was his and Hope's, he thought, looking at the only girl he had truly loved, who was looking at them adoringly. He was at home, where he really belonged. They were together, they were a family. He was really happy.

He watches the baby wrinkle his nose.

"He looks a lot like Josie, he has her nose." Hope's soft voice intruded on his thoughts.

Landon looked down at the baby and realized it wasn't Hope's nose or his own. It was Josie's features he was looking at. His mind returned to reality, to the life he couldn't escape.

Without saying anything, he returned the baby to Hope, who was ignorant of the fact that his heart was breaking into a thousand pieces in front of her.

Since he met her, something had drawn him to Hope. It wasn't her good looks or her personality. It was the way she looked at him, they felt so connected, like they were looking for the same thing. As if everything she was looking for she saw in him, that look was gone.

Hope had finally found what she was looking for and it wasn't him.

Then he asked the question.

"You're really happy, right?"

"Yes I am. More than I ever thought I could be "

She really was, he realized. He has never seen her look so happy. He had always thought that the loss of her parents was what made her so unhappy, so incomplete. The revelation that he was wrong hit him and he wanted to be anywhere other than with this bright, happy life that he couldn't have and the girl who loved someone other than him.

"You know, it's late. I should go" he opened the door and looked at Hope, feeling the finality of the moment "bye, Hope"

"Bye, Landon" she watched him go without being sure what had happened. Luke began to move angrily against Hope's chest. "Well, let's go with mommy and your brother"

She put Luke in the middle of the bed, near where Josie and Andy were sleeping soundly. Luke made noise, Josie still asleep stretched her arm to bring the baby closer to her. Hope smiled at that, the conversation with Landon erased from her head. Silently she changed and then took her place on the bed with the babies lying between her and Josie.

There they were, she thought. Her gaze sweeping over Josie and the babies. Her whole world was in that bed. She kissed each of them on the cheek and smiled at the identical expression of disgust that appeared on all three of them for disturbing their sleep. She closed her eyes, happy.