Dean X Male Reader One Shots

Coping

A bit of a trigger warning here. If you're prone to flashbacks due to mentions of physical abuse then I would skip this one. ~ MDM

The feeling is overwhelming and you can't shut it down. You've stared this monster in the face so many times before, and you can never beat it down. The rising panic in your chest is suffocating and you can feel your throat closing. The pressure makes you sink to your knees. You cover your face and weep. Your body shakes and you collapse. You lay on your side, curled in the fetal position, whimpering pitifully. The memories of everything crashing onto you like a tsunami you can hardly get a breath in. The crack of breaking bones and the sting of fresh wounds plays across your skin like they're still happening. Hands touch your skin and you scream, scooting away. Cowering in the corner you curl inwards protecting yourself as best you can.

"Hey, you're ok. Angel eyes can you look at me? They aren't here. You're ok. It's ok." You stare into the darkness that comes with the shelter of your arms. If you don't look you're safe. That always works. Never look them in the eyes and you'll stay unbroken. Flesh won't be burnt, bones won't be broken, and scars won't be formed. Rocking back and forth silently, you bite down on your lip so hard you break skin. The copper taste of your blood centers you slightly and you realize that you're not there. They can't hurt you. They're dead. You take a deep breath and raise your head. The Winchesters are kneeling in front of you and a smattering of people are gathered behind them.

"Where are we?" Your voice breaks slightly and as you try to keep another flood of tears at bay.

"We're in the bunker honey. What did you see?"

"Memories. Bad ones." Every face turns understanding and similar flashes of pain cross every single one of them in sympathy.

"I know you don't like to be touched after your flashbacks, but I feel like you need to be held." You crawl forward and tuck yourself into Dean's open arms. The warmth of him and the scent of vanilla make your anxiety tick down slightly. He holds you tight and rocks slightly knowing that that comforts you. Curling your fingers into the fabric of his henley, you close your eyes.

"I love you Dean." His lips press into your forehead and you can feel his smile on your skin.

"I love you more than you will ever know. That will never change."