I'm all yours | Mattia Polibio|

Part 25

Mattia

" are you sure I can tell her?" I asked Kai again, " what if she-"

" she won't," Kai said, " Inayah's not like that."

We heard a knock on the door and when I answered it Inayah stood there, looking a little tired and frustrated.

She yawned loudly and walked in, " this better be important," we followed after her to the living room and she sat down on the sofa, " go on them, I'm losing my beauty sleep over this," she said rushing us.

I looked at the boys and they nodded at me, " ok, but please don't freak out or anything," I told her and she nodded rubbing her eye. I sat down next to her and she looked at me curiously. She waited for me to carry on but I couldn't get it out for some reason, " I can't do it," I said standing up again and the boys sighed.

" just tell her, she'll help you out!" Kai told me.

" what if she can't, then there's one more person that knows. It's gonna get awkward when we're all together," I told him.

"dude if you don't tell her I will," ale said.

" don't you fucking dare!" I said pointing at him.

The three of us started bickering and arguing.

" QUIET!" Inayah yelled and we turned to look at her. She stood up, " someone better tell me what the hell is going on because if I find out I'm losing sleep for nothing all of you are gonna be sorry!" She said angrily.The boys looked at me again and Inayah walked up to me, looking me dead in the eye, " if you've got something to say mate then say it now!" She yelled at me.

" I'm in love with Zora!" I quickly said to her.

Her facial expression relaxed a little and I waited for her to react in some way. She smirked at me and it was making me feel more nervous than I was before, " I knew it," she said laughing to herself and she sat back onto the sofa.

I furrowed my eyebrows a little and looked at the boys because that really wasn't the reaction I was expecting, and by the looks on their faces neither were they.

" what?" I asked and I sat on the sofa next to her, " there's no way you could've known. Even I didn't know until a few days ago,"

" yeah, well I've know for a while now Mattia," she said, " you probably did know but I could sense that you had feelings for Zora. You finally let your brain listen to your heart and you realised it too."

I looked at her baffled and she smiled at me. She looked wide awake now and less frustrated about coming here.

" how come you didn't tell us?" Ale asked, and Kai nodded agreeing with her.

" well because it ruins it all doesn't it?" She said, " I had a feeling he liked her but I didn't know how badly. So I thought I'd let it progress on its own and see how it ends up," she looked back at me, " and it looks like it ended up exactly how I thought it would,"

I scoffed, " I'm not that predictable am I?" I asked her.

She shook her head, " it's not that, it's just that if you're crushing on Zora it slowly will turn into something more. The longer you spend time with her the more you realise how attractive her personality and soul are.I knew it wouldn't be long before you fell for her,"

When I thought about it I realised that she was right. There was just always something there from the beginning. And the more time I spent with Zora the harder it got to ignore it, and it wasn't until a few night ago when it hit me properly.

She sat up, " so what are you going to do about it?" She asked me.

The boys sat down and they all looked at me. I tried thinking about it but I couldn't make a decision. It's hard because she's making me question myself and I don't think any girl has made me do that, " nothing," I answered.

Inayah and the boys looked at each other, " WHAT!?" The three of them yelled at the same time.

I palmed my face and then stood up. The three of them watched me pace around, " I know it sounds crazy but I think even you can agree with me on this Inayah," and I looked at her, " Zora deserves way better,"

She groaned loudly which again took my by surprise because it wasn't the reaction I was expecting. She stood up, " my god I wanna smack you so hard right now," and she palmed her forehead.

I stepped away from her, " please don't,"

She tutted, " mattia, do you really like her?" She asked me.

I furrowed my eyebrows, " yeah, of course I do-"

" well then stop with this bullshit about not being enough for her. If you really liked her then you wouldn't make excuses like 'she deserves better', you'd change and make yourself better," she told me.

" but what if she doesn't feel the same way Inayah?" I asked her, " what if I do make myself better and it doesn't make a difference?"

" you'll never know if you don't try Mattia," she said sympathetically.

" can't you just ask her and make it easier for all of us?" Kai asked Inayah.

" I can't do my best friend like that." she said turning around to look at him, " trust me, if I had any doubt that mattia's efforts would go waste I wouldn't be telling him to give it a shot now. If I knew that It'd never work I wouldn't be telling him to go after her." She turned back to me, " if you really want her you have to show her that you do. Zora likes it when a guy isn't embarrassed to show affection, she wants to know if you're willing to put in the same effort as her,"

I sighed and ran my hands through my hair for what seems like the billionth time today, " what if she gets creeped out by the sudden change, I don't want to scare her,"

" you won't," she said reassuringly, " Zora really cares about you Mattia. Not in a love way, I don't think but you're an important person to her. You still have another chance at being with her, and it's not too late to make that happen,"

I wasn't feeling that doubtful about any of this anymore. If anything Inayah's helped me understand that I can still be with Zora and the only thing that's getting in the way is myself.

It's time I stopped feeling sorry for myself because there's a way I can still make this happen. I don't know how long it'll take me to do it but it's worth everything. Zora's worth everything, and I was an idiot for even doubting she was.

****

I feel so bad for future history students man. They're gonna have so much shit to go through, and 2021 just started so there's probably gonna be more.