I'm all yours | Mattia Polibio|

Part 39

Mattia pov

Why is she so hard to read? Why can't I tell if she likes me?

" dude are you good?" Kai asked walking into my office. Ale came in behind him.

I looked at them both nervously and shook my head, " no,"

They both came in and sat opposite me, " what is it?" Kai asked.

" it's tomorrow," I told them both, " once we get that decree absolute we're.....we're done,"

They both sat there in shock, " wow," ale said, " it's been 6 months already?" He asked and I nodded, " damn, that went fast,"

It just zoomed past. All of it.

" but you're gonna stop it right?" Kai asked me, " y'all aren't going there tomorrow right?"

I looked up at both of them and then back at my desk, " we are,"

They both sighed, " just tell her, for fucks sake please just tell her!" Ale yelled.

" I can't it's not that simple," I told them, " Do you realise how messed up things will be if I do and she doesn't feel the same?" I asked them both.

Ale slammed the desk, " this is bullshit, you're really going to let the best thing in your life walk away?"

" well she's not walking away, she'll still be here. Working with us," I told them both, " I'd rather still have her as a friend than not have her in my life at all,"

" so then what are you gonna do when she starts dating other guys?" Kai asked, " you're just gonna stand there and accept it?"

" well I have to don't I?" I said a little irritated, " look I've tried, I can't force us to be together. I can't make something that was never going to happen, happen!"

" how would you know?" Kai asked, " ale's right you need to be up front with her and tell her," Kai said.

" Kai you're the perfect example as to why I'm not gonna do that. Look what happened between Inayah and you," I said, " did y'all end up together? no!"

Kai scoffed, " that's completely different. Inayah was a small crush that I had. She means a lot to me still but in a completely different way. You can't compare what I had for with what you have for Zora," he leaned a little closer, " Mattia you love her, and it's not some sort of crush like I had. What you have for her is way stronger and it's not going to change. You have to tell her!"

" I....I can't," I said resting my head on my desk.

Ale stood up, " tell her now or we will," Kai nodded standing up too.

my head bolted up, " don't you fucking dare,"I told them both seriously. Inayah said she'd do the same but I begged her not to either, " don't ruin the only thing I have with her,"

Kai sighed and looked at me sadly, " you could have so much more if you-"

" I know," I said interrupting him , " but there's always that chance that I won't. There's always that chance where it'll just mess up and I don't want that to happen."

Ale ran his hands through his hair, " you're going to regret this," we all turned around to look into Zora's office but she wasn't in there anymore. I guess we were so absorbed in our conversation we didn't see her leave.

I knew I was going to regret it but there was nothing else to do but accept it.

*****

Well the drive home for me was awkward. I was hoping Inayah would be in the car with us but she asked the boys to drop her off earlier, so it was just the two of us.