Mine

[34]

The days felt like they were passing by so slowly, that I was surprised when I realized that it had actually been a month since I was last hit with the Cruciatus curse.  I honestly hated being at Hogwarts.  Things were so boring and uncomfortable.  I was counting down the day till I'd be going home for Christmas break, which thankfully was only a few weeks away now. 

I spent my time doing schoolwork or sitting in the common room.  If I wasn't in the common room then I was most likely in Draco's room.  I found that I slept there most nights rather than in my own dorm.  Draco liked having me in his bed and would often complain if I insisted on sleeping in my own bed.  Something had shifted within him.  He seemed to be antsy and a little on edge when I wasn't with him.  I imagined it had something to do with him worrying that I was going to land myself in the Carrows' office again.

I had decided to sleep in Draco's room tonight, having slept in my own bed the night before.  It was late and we should be sleeping, but instead we were laying in the dark, Draco lazily running his fingers over my arm.

"I have to have a son, if we survive this." Draco randomly said, his eyes trained on the ceiling.  "To continue the Malfoy bloodline."

I peered at him out of the corner of my eye, my heart fluttering slightly in my chest.  He had said if we survive this.  Was he implying he wanted to have a son with me?  I knew our relationship was much more serious than some schooltime fling, but we'd never discussed the future before.  I didn't really sit around and fantasize what my life would be like after Hogwarts.  Maybe it was because everything was so unstable right now and there was no telling what our world would look like in a few years from now.

"Do you want children?" Draco asked, his voice breaking the silence that had once again taken over after he last spoke.

"I guess." I said, looking back up the ceiling.  "I've never really thought about it.  I just assumed it would happen because, like, that's what people do."

"You've never imagined yourself as a mother?" Draco asked slowly.  I could feel the pillow beside me shift, indicating he had turned his head towards me.

"No, I haven't." I replied simply.  "It's not that I'm opposed to the idea of it, it just isn't something I've spent time thinking about."

Draco remained silent, so I finally turned my head to look at him.  He was staring at me, his eyes scanning my face once I'd turned it towards him.  "What?" I asked quietly.

"You don't want children with me, or you just don't want children?" He asked slowly.

"I didn't say either of those things, Draco." I said with a frown, my eyebrows pulling together.  "I'm not in a position where I'm dreaming of having a baby to take care of.  I'm only seventeen.  I have so much more living that I hope to do."

"I'm just trying to think of happy things, Gemma." Draco said, his voice thick with annoyance.  He turned his head back to its previous position of facing up towards the ceiling.  "Everything is so goddamn depressing around here.  Everyone is miserable.  The entire wizarding world is miserable and just waiting to implode.  I'd like to think that some day there is going to be something to look forward to.  Some reason to even keep going."

I just stared at him, taking in the emotionless state of his face as he stared up.  He had a point, and it was the reason I had a hard time fantasizing the future.  The future wasn't promised.  Not to me, not to him, not to anyone.

"So, you have to have a son." I sighed out, turning my head back towards the ceiling as well.  "When you put it that way it sounds more like a chore than something you want."

"I'd like to be a father." He said, sighing quietly.  "I think as I grew up and my father grew colder, I found myself thinking 'When I have children, I'll do this differently.'  Maybe it's because there is an expectation that I'd have a son, but the more I noticed those thoughts, the more I realized that I do want to be a father.  And I want to be a very different one than my father has been."

"Oh, so now its children, not just one singular child?" I teased lightly, trying to lighten the mood from the slightly tense one that hung around us.

"Well, I'd like to have a daughter too.  Though it's not likely.  Malfoys almost always only have sons." He said, looking at me out of the corner of his eye.  "But yes.  It can be lonely, being an only child."

"That makes sense." I nodded.  "I'm glad I have my brother.  Don't get me wrong, sometimes when we were younger, I wished I was an only child because siblings can be damn annoying.  But I'm so glad that I had him around."

"It's settled then.  We'll have two children, probably both sons, but hopefully one girl and one boy." Draco said.

"Woah, woah, woah.  You want this to happen with me?" I asked, scoffing playfully.  Draco turned to look at me, but once he saw the playful smile on my face, he just rolled his eyes at me and gave my shoulder a light shove.

"You're so annoying." He mumbled, rolling on top of me, staring down at me with a smirk.  "Maybe I should get rid of you and find someone more suitable to be the mother of my children."

I gasped in fake hurt, "More suitable?  Impossible!  I am obviously the most qualified person for the job.  In fact, let's start right now!"

Draco chuckled softly, shaking his head as he smiled at me.  "No, you have too much living on your list of things to do for us to start right now.  But we could always practice."

I rolled my eyes as he suggestively wiggled his eyebrows at me, trying to push him off of me.  "What we should do is go to sleep.  Go back to your side of the bed."

"I don't think so." Draco said, grabbing my wrists and pinning my arms down to the mattress.  His lips hovered over mine as his playful demeanor suddenly dropped, his eyes watching me intently.  I felt a flutter in my stomach as he dropped his lips to my neck.  Out of instinct, my arms tried to raise so that I could tangle my fingers in Draco's hair, but he kept them firmly pressed into the mattress.

His lips slowly traveled down my neck until he was sucking at the sensitive spot in the crook of my neck and collarbone.  My eyes fluttered shut as his teeth grazed over my skin, his warm breath against the spot he had just been sucking on sent a chill down my spine.  Draco kissed across the base of my throat, bringing his lips to the other side of my neck and working his way up, slowly kissing and sucking as he went.

"Still want to go to sleep?" He said lowly, his lips tickling my ear as he spoke.

"No." I whispered in response, opening my eyes as I felt his head moving away from me.  Draco leaned back, sitting down on my thighs as he stared at me with a wide smirk.  I shot him a confused look, but slowly realized just what he was doing.  He was just teasing me!  I could feel myself blush in the dark, feeling flustered as Draco laughed softly and dropped down beside me on the bed.

"Goodnight, Gemma." He said as he rolled over so that his back was to me.  I could hear his smirk in his words.

"You ass." I muttered, elbowing him in the back.

"Love you too." He chuckled, clearly very proud with himself.

I rolled my eyes and sighed as I turned on my side, my back to him as well.

"You aren't even going to cuddle me?  I thought I was finally going to be the little spoon!"  Draco exclaimed, just trying to bother me even more with his teasing.

"Go to bed!" I shouted, only making Draco laugh even harder.  "Merlin, you're going to be the death of me."