Best Friends

36 Would You Still Love Me

"hey Lex. We're going to the shops is there anything you need?" Adam asked as I walked into the kitchen
"I'm I don't think so"
"None of your "girly things"" Mikey said
"Grow a pair man. You live with a female get over it" adam joked. Mikey left the room and he turned to me who was desperately overthinking the situation "You alright?"
"Uh yeah. Just get me the ones i normally get."
"You want any snacks or anything like that"
"No just that"
"Okay. Are you sure you're alright?"
"Yeah. Like I said I'm fine. Just get the ones I normally buy" he didn't seem to buy my excuse but he nodded anyway and soon left the house with Dom and Mikey. I thought that Tom had left with them too but that was soon disproven when he walked into the kitchen
"Hey Lexi" he said brightly. I didn't respond and just stood in silence "Are you alright lex?"
"Do you love me?"
"Of course I do. Might not tell ya all the time like Dom and Adam do but I do love ya." He stopped whatever he was doing and walked over to me "You just needing reassurance?"
"Would you still love me if I was pregnant?"
"I'd love both of you." He said smiling. Then his face fell when he realised "Why? Are you pregnant?" He chuckled nervously
"I don't know. Maybe."
"Shit" he muttered under his breath. He saw how my face changed when I heard him "I didn't mean it like that. I just mean... Shit I'm really bad at this" I chuckled at him stuttering
"Yeah I'm not particularly great at this either"
"Right. Well. I think you should wait. How long from when your period was supposed to start" he was surprisingly knowledgeable. Or maybe I just came across guys who didn't have a clue.
"Three days. The app on my phone told me. But we did it on new years."
"That's alright. Just wait a little longer"
"I don't want to. What if I am and I do something to hurt it."
"Just relax k?"
"Easy for you to say. You're not-"
"Shh. Don't raise your voice"
"Not like the boys are here is it." I snapped
"I'm sorry." He said looking a little down and making me feel bad for snapping at him
"You're trying. It's just I'm a little stressed right now. C-can I have a hug? I just need you to-" I was cut off by him hugging me tight
"That I can do anytime."
"I don't know what to do."
"You should take some time to calm down and then see what you wanna do."
"Yeah. That sounds the best thing to do right now. I guess I need to try and stay calm just in case."
"Come on then. I'll make you a hot drink and you can decide."
"Yeah. Can you make me a hot chocolate?"
"With the whippy cream?"
"We don't have any."
"Yeah we do. I just hid it in the fridge" he opened the fridge door and fumbled about in there before closing it again and presenting the can of cream. He seemed so proud with himself and his energy just made me smile "See. Now go on. I'll bring it through"

"You took a while" I said softly as he handed me my drink
"Yeah. Just thinking it all over. Might move back"
"I thought you were happy where you're staying. It's better than bunking with the boys"
"Yeah it is. But there's always your room. And maybe I'm needed more here"
"Why's that. You don't need to disrupt your life for us"
"It's alright. It's not working out anyway. I practically live here and my girlfriend is pretty pissed that you're about again"
"Oh. Sorry"
"Don't be. We may have had an argument about it."
"When?"
"When I came back from Doncaster"
"Tom that was over two weeks ago."
"I know. Why'd you think I've been about here that long"
"Fuck if I'd have known I was an issue i-"
"One: you are not a fucking issue. Two: I told her to stick her jealousy where the sun don't shine and left there"
"I broke you and her up"
"No. That's not what I'm saying at all. She wasn't good for me. I'm better here. With you and the boys" he watched the expression on my face stay puzzled "Are you alright?"
"I'm going upstairs"
"No way. Nuh uh. I'm not leaving you alone with those thoughts in your head"
"I'm not a fucking kid Tom. I just need to think."
"I can't stop you I guess." He sighed and gently touched my knee "I'll be up to see how you're doing later yeah?"
"Yeah." I set my empty cup down on the coffee table and got up "Thanks though. For being so understanding"
"I'll always be there for you. Okay?"
"I know"
"Lexi none of this is your fault."
"I'll see you in a minute"
"Lex i-" I cut him off by closing the door.
"Great." I mumbled to myself "Something else you fuck up"

He kept his word and came up what must have been an hour or so later. At least it felt like that. He knocked lightly twice before letting himself in to the room
"You alright?"
"Yeah. I'm sorry for snapping at you" I felt the bed dip slightly as he sat down at the foot of it
"It's alright. It's a natural reaction I guess. I know that's how you deal with stress sometimes"
"What if I am pregnant?"
"Then like I said. I'll support you."
"But what about Dom?" I shuffled forward on the bed so I was sat beside him
"What about him? I don't think he will be mad. And if he does anything to you I swear to god ill-"
"Tom" he instantly stopped what he was going to say "I'm worried. We only just got on good terms. And I don't even know how I could be pregnant. We used a condom"
"Things happen. But it's nothing to be ashamed of."
"How are you so calm?"
"Because like you said. It's not me who has to go through it. Do you want to tell Dom?"
"Not yet. I just needed to tell someone that wasn't him. Just to get it out. It might be nothing."
"I'm glad you told someone. Even if it turns out to be nothing"
"I shouldn't have stormed off. It wasn't fun being up here alone."
"Why didnt you come down then"
"Cus I'm stubborn" he laughed a little
"Don't I fucking know it. You want to come back down?"
"Not really."
"You got any games up here?"
"Yeah I think so"
"Let's play one then. De stress"

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