Bereft (h.s)

26. Chester.

the song she mentions at the end ^^^

Chapter 26

Alycia's Pov.

I woke up and felt myself tangled into Harry. Our legs were tangled and my face was smushed to his chest. He was asleep on his side with his head resting on top of mine.

I wasn't super comfortable in this position so I shuffled upwards and he moved in his sleep with a slight groaned. I got head level with him and he shuffled down a bit before he wrapped his arms around my waist tightly and nuzzled his face into my neck. He let out a big sigh and suddenly his breathing steadied again. Fuck, my heart. He's so fucking cute in his sleep. And in general but especially in his sleep. He clings to me and I love it so much. He likes to be in control kind of, most of the time in other situations. So when we sleep and he clings to me like this, my heart just fucking melts.

I very lightly ran my fingers through his hair to maybe help him rest better. I could hear his breathing close to my ear and it really just calmed me.

Whenever he got here, he looked very tired. I thought maybe he had smoked because he seemed out of it like he does when he's high but he said he didn't. His eyes didn't look like he had smoked either so I don't know what's up. I really hope he's okay. I didn't wanna ruin the night by talking about it because he seemed happy to be here. He seemed more content once he got here and we laid in bed. I didn't want to stress him out by bringing up the topic in case something is wrong. I'm gonna touch on it tomorrow though.

I looked at my nightstand and it said 7:58 and I hadn't even realized that the sun was peeking through my windows because my blinds are closed. They're made to be like black out curtains are so they don't let much sun in at all but I could see faint light from a few cracks.

I was getting restless laying here so I tried to gently get out of bed without waking Harry up. I did the usual thing and put my pillow in front of him when I got out from his arms and he immediately grabbed the pillow.

I got up and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and pee. I always drink a bottle of water before bed so peeing in the morning is always the first thing I do.

Jasper pushed his way into the bathroom with me and nudged Harry's bag he brought in here last night in the corner. It was already open but when Jasper hit it, a pill bottle fell out. On top of that, the top must not have been on it very well because the pills came out.

It made a loud noise so I was praying it didn't wake Harry up. I scrambled to pick them up and quickly put them back in the bottle. I know it's not my business but I had to look at the label. The last thing I was expecting it to be was painkillers...but that's exactly what it was.

What the fuck? Why does he have painkillers?

I sat them back on top of his bag so maybe he'd see them when he comes in here later. Maybe he'll realize I probably saw them because I don't want to bring it up but I want him to know I know. I want him to tell me.

Is this why he's been so out of it lately? Always seeming tired? And that day in the studio when he had bags under his eyes and looked so exhausted, was he on pain pills? Or some of the many other pills that were in the drawer of his bathroom?

Suddenly my heart dropped at the thought of him being so low that he does all of this. Coke is so different from a pain pill though so why does he do coke? Just to feel some kind of high? I really want to talk to him about this but I know it's not my place. I don't want to overstep my boundaries but I don't think he's really planning on telling me. I just don't want to push him away either.