Bereft (h.s)

72. Hypochondriac.

okay so the songs in this chapter are
without me - halsey (will be on alycia's album)
&
hypochondriac - sasha sloan (won't be on alycia's album)

Chapter 72

Alycia's Pov.

"Let me hear it." Matt said with a smile as he swiveled his chair around.

I wanted to show this new song to Matt before anyone else got here. Chester, Leon and apparently Harry are all coming but I just wanted to show Matt this piece before anyone else gets here. It's about Harry and I wrote it during the first day that I saw him out with Caroline. I was mad. I don't want him thinking i'm still mad so I don't want to show him.

I got a beat I had been working on just for the sake of showing him this and pulled it up to play through the speakers. A guitar didn't go well with this but I know Matt will fix it all up once I actually record it.

He hopped his head along with a little smile and cocked his brow as I still hadn't started singing.

I grabbed my journal and couched slightly before starting.

"Found you when you were broke
I filled your cup until it overflowed
Took it so far to keep you close
I was afraid to leave you on your own"

I started singing and I didn't have the normal comfort of a guitar in my lap or piano in front of me so I felt a little strange. Although I couldn't play a guitar right now anyways because of my wrist.

"I said I'd catch you if you fall
And if they laugh, then fuck 'em all
And then I got you off your knees
Put you right back on your feet
Just so you could take advantage of me

Tell me, how's it feel sittin' up there?
Feelin' so high, but too far away to hold me
You know I'm the one who put you up there
Name in the sky, does it ever get lonely?
Thinkin' you could live without me
Thinkin' you could live without me
Baby, I'm the one who put you up there
I don't know why
Thinkin' you could live without me
Live without me
Baby, I'm the one who put you up there
I don't know why"

The whole last part was just mentally speaking. I'm very aware everyone knows who he is and I didn't put him up on a pedastool for the world to see. I just felt like I had made him feel better even just for a small period of time and he just took that feeling and used it to talk to another girl. It's not how I feel now, but it's how I felt when I wrote it.

I also wrote a few others. I just don't want him to ever hear the others.

"Gave love 'bout a hundred tries
Just runnin' from the demons in your mind
Then I took yours and made 'em mine
I didn't notice 'cause my love was blind"

I followed with the chorus once more before leaning forward to stop the beat.

I looked up at Matt and he smiled softly.

"Badass. I love it. Please don't tell me you're not gonna put the recording on the album because of Harry. He'll understand and he'll also think it's badass." He said and I chuckled. "Yeah I actually might want to put that one on the album. It's definitely not the worst one of the bunch that I wrote about him during that time. So."