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12. The Waiting Game

There's nothing like getting writer's block for only one part of a story, but having everything else figured out.

TW: swearing,

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"So how the fuck did you mess up the spell?" Janus asked with a sigh. Virgil was sitting on the edge of his bed, watching Roman, who was still passed out cold, with a concerned expression. "That is one of the easiest spells, so there's no way you fucked it up that much if you tried just the original. That's one of the first spells anyone with magic learns, Virgil. What did you do?"

"I didn't try to hurt him," Virgil whispered. His voice was full of barely concealed fear and concern. "I didn't want this to happen. I told him there was a risk. There's always such a risk."

"You changed the spell, didn't you?" Janus asked. When Virgil didn't respond he knew for sure that he was correct. The thought of altering a spell made his stomach drop. There were so many ways it could've gone wrong, and figuring out which way it had gone wrong would be a problem. "What on earth did you change about it?"

"He wasn't supposed to get bonded to me," Virgil said quietly. "I changed the spell so he wouldn't be completely infatuated like the actual pets are. I didn't want him to have to deal with that. I just needed help with something, and this was the easiest way to do it. I told him about the risks... he didn't care. The spell wasn't supposed to bond him to me or make him act infatuated. It also got changed so if I asked him a question the daze would clear, and he could answer like as if he'd never been spelled at all, and once the question is answered the daze comes back. Everything else about it was the same. I don't know what I did wrong."

"Oh dear god," Janus muttered. "That was a lot to change. Most people don't even change one thing about a spell, and you changed three very particular parts of it to change."

"I know," Virgil said. "I warned him... the last time I brought him out of it he had a headache. Now there's this. I just... why did it have to go wrong? Of course it just had to go wrong. I don't know how to fix this. He's going to insist that he's fine and he's going to let me put the spell back on him, but I don't think he's fine. I don't know what to do."

"Why did you even alter the spell in the first place?" Janus asked. "It's not forbidden to bring people back from the isle without spelling them, so why did you? Why go through the work of making him look spelled? What could've been so important that you risked it?"

"I can't tell you," Virgil mumbled. "If I tell you... if somehow someone finds out... it'll all be over, Janus. I'm afraid that this time if something gets out about this I'm not going to get through it. But... I can live with that. Well, die with that. I just have to keep Roman safe. it doesn't matter if I die for this, because as long as he lives I odn't have to deal wiht the guilt for it. I can't let him get hurt for me. It's not that I don't trust you, Jan... but I can't trust you. I trust you, but with this I can't. If you even tell anyone about what just happened Roman will be dead where he stands, and possibly me right with him."

"Oh," Janus said softly. "I see. You're going to erase my memory."

"I'm sorry," Virgil whisered. "There's no other way. I can't let Roman get hurt for me. I'm sorry."

"I get it," Janus said. "I wish it didn't have to happen this way, but I get it. It makes sense. Just... let me help you figure out what's up with Roman before you do it. If I can help in any way before you make me forget then I want to."

"Thank you, Janus," Virgil said. "I don't get what I did. I made the spell the exact same way as when I first put it on him, but then this happened. I don't know what I did."

"Well, we won't know anything until he wakes up. Until then, it's a guessing game."

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