Fractured [SHAWN MENDES]

~28~

"If you're lookin' for Taryn, she's out making a bank deposit," Patricia said with a warm smile when Shawn entered the bar.

"It's you I came to see. I heard you had a new look, so I wanted to check it out. I have to say, it's even better than Taryn's description. You look gorgeous!"

"Oh goodness...no need to gush over me! Good thing my daughter isn't here or she might turn a bit green."

Shawn sat down at the bar. "Can I get a cup of coffee, please?"

"Of course! If you're hungry, the soup of the day is French onion and it's out of this world. Zack caramelized the onions yesterday and the smell had me drooling," Tricia said as she filled a mug with fresh brew.

The bell on the door sounded and both of them turned to see Taryn walk in.

When she saw Shawn, her face lit up. "Did you get a haircut?"

He ran a hand through his newly coiffed hair. "I did. I look like I did at fifteen, which is kinda weird."

"The hair is similar, but your face has changed a lot since then. It's much more angular and handsome." She took a seat next to him and gave his knee a squeeze.

"I'm going to do a quick liquor inventory," Tricia said as an excuse to give them a minute alone. She still didn't completely approve of their relationship, but she could tell he made her daughter happy.

Shawn leaned over and gave Taryn a quick kiss. "I missed you last night."

"Mmm. Same." She'd stayed over Sunday and Monday but had gone home after work on Tuesday because she didn't want to come across as clingy. Besides, if they weren't actually a couple, it was weird for her to spend every night with him.

"I'm kind of anxious about tomorrow. Any chance you'd want to come home with me tonight?" he asked quietly.

She laughed. "You know how that sounds, don't you?"

He did. And truthfully, he meant it that way. Sex with Taryn was better than any therapy session with Paul. She'd benefit from it just as much as he would, so he didn't feel all that guilty about it. "Is it wrong that being with you makes me feel better?"

"No. You make me feel pretty good, too."

"Pretty good?"

"Yep," she said as she hopped off the barstool. "I'm going to check on the customers. Did you want lunch? I can put an order in."

"I'll have the French onion soup and a Caesar salad."

"Good choices."

Tricia returned from the kitchen and went behind the bar to evaluate the keg levels. She needed Zack to carry them in from the cooler since they were so heavy. They'd been going through a lot of trendy craft beers lately, which was probably due to the slightly younger crowd. Taryn's dream was to own a place that produced their own craft beer, and Patricia knew there was a good chance her daughter would make this happen. She was smart and fiercely determined, and hopefully she would never have a man who held her back like she had.

After he finished his lunch, Shawn left some tip money on the counter and told Taryn he'd see her at closing time. He walked home, making it inside his building right before a storm hit Toronto. As he sat on his couch watching the rain beat down on the entertainment district, he felt the beginnings of a panic attack.

"No no no!" he muttered to himself. "Keep yourself together!"

Many years ago he'd suffered from frequent anxiety, so he employed some of the tricks that helped back then. He did some focused breathing exercises and then tried to meditate. It didn't completely help, but it took enough if the edge off that he didn't feel like he was having a heart attack. Fuck. If this happened tomorrow during the interview he'd look like a psychopath!

Keeping busy sometimes worked as a distraction, so he got up and started cleaning the condo, tidying up before dusting and vacuuming. In the kitchen, he wiped down all the surfaces and scrubbed the sink. Then he moved on to the bathrooms, which was his least favorite job, but the most necessary. Once it was done, the place looked and smelled amazing. Oddly enough, the improved surroundings calmed him down and lifted his mood.

He wanted to have some food on hand when Gretchen arrived, so he grabbed an umbrella and set out for a bakery that had recently opened a couple blocks away. He got an assortment of pastries, both sweet and savory, since their appointment was at nine in the morning. As he waited to be rung up, he felt like he was being watched. Given who he was, this wasn't an unusual occurrence, but it still sent a shiver down his spine. He knew that being recognized was inevitable, but he didn't like being confronted, even by friendly fans.

It was dinner time when he got home, so he heated up a frozen meal and ate it on the couch in front in the TV since the Blue Jays were playing. During the ninth inning, Andrew called to wish him luck and to offer some advice. An hour later, his parents did the same thing. Even Aaliyah texted him, which meant his mom or dad had filled her in on the situation.

The rain subsided by the time he walked to the bar. Taryn was chatting with a large group at a table near the window, and he felt immediate comfort when he saw her smiling face.

"Lemme guess. A double rye tonight?" she asked when she got to him.

"Just water, thanks. Booze and anxiety aren't the best combo for me. Weed sometimes helps, but I haven't smoked in awhile."

"How come? It's legal and god knows it's got a lot of benefits. I enjoy a puff every now and then," she said after getting him a glass of ice water with lemon.

He grinned. "On Sunday we should get high together."

She leaned closer to him and whispered, "You just want to have sex while we're stoned."

"It is pretty great."

After the bar closed, they took Taryn's car to the condo and went straight to the bedroom. Following a boisterous session of sex that involved several different positions, they cuddled on the bed like spoons, with Shawn's larger body cocooned around hers.

"It's a completely moonless night," Taryn observed as she looked out the window. The shade was down, but it was made out of a mesh material so you could still see out.

"Maybe it's just behind some clouds. It's rained off and on all day."

"No, there'd still be a glow. It's pitch black outside, other than the lights from the buildings. When I was little, I was afraid of nights like this."

"You don't have to be afraid now, honey. I'm here and I won't let anything hurt you."

His tender words made her heart flutter, and she nestled closer to his warm body.

Taryn awoke with a start from a nightmare about a monster watching her as it hid in a corner. Her heart was racing in her chest, and she was covered in a film of perspiration. What she needed was a glass of cold water, so she slipped out of Shawn's arms and walked out of the bedroom down the dark hallway towards the kitchen. She could make out the piano, so she swerved around it. Her left foot caught on the piano bench and she lurched forward, falling on the large wooden coffee table. As her face hit the edge, she cried out in pain.

The lights came on and Shawn rushed over to her. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"I fell and crashed into the coffee table," she said as she cupped the side of her face.

He carefully helped her up and walked her into the kitchen where the lighting was better. He examined her injury. "Jesus, Taryn. You're going to have a nasty bruise. Maybe we should go to the ER to make sure you didn't break your cheekbone."

She reached up and gingerly pressed on the afflicted area. "I don't think it's broken. I caught myself with my arm right as I hit."

"Let's get some ice on it, and you should probably take some Advil."

She let him baby her and once the pain relievers kicked in, they crawled back into bed.