Fractured [SHAWN MENDES]

~48~

Shawn sat at the table at the back of the bar nervously drumming his fingers on the worn oak table as he waited. Were they standing him up?

Three weeks ago, when the article was getting tons of buzz, he'd received a message in the group chat with his closest Canadian friends. Brian started it by saying he missed him and wanted to hang out. Everyone else chimed in and said they felt the same way, and soon they were making plans to meet at a bar they used to go to back when he was still on top of the world. It was an ideal location because there were secluded tables that offered privacy. He'd considered suggesting that they meet at The Good Luck Lounge, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to merge his past with his present.

"Hey hey hey!"

Shawn turned around and saw Matt and Brian grinning behind him. Standing up, he gave each of them a hug. "It's good to see you guys."

"Same, man! Ian and Jon will be here in a few. Their Uber was late," Matt told him.

"You look really good!" Brian said. "Not to be a dick, but the bald head was kind of scary and you were way too thin."

Shawn knew he was referring to the pictures after his prison release, because it's not like his friends had seen him in person. This was the first time they'd been together in years.

"The food in jail will do that to you," he replied, which resulted in an awkward silence. Thankfully the waitress appeared and took their drink orders.

The other two guys arrived right as the server returned with their beers. It was surreal for Shawn to be with his best friends after not seeing them for so long. Each person looked the same as they always had, yet also so much older. They had wrinkles at the corners of their eyes and their faces seemed leaner. Had he changed, too?

"I'm just gonna say it," Ian said. "This is long overdue and I feel like shit about that."

Shawn shook his head. "I'm the one who stopped replying to the group chat."

"True, but none of us made any attempt to bring you back in," Matt countered. "We were in a hard place since we're friends with..." He stopped since the name of their friend might not be welcome at the table.

"I get that. I really do. I never expected you to choose sides."

"For what it's worth, we all think he was an asshole for being with her while you were engaged. It's not like we forgot that side of it," Jon said. "But what you did blew our minds. It's like we didn't even know who you were anymore."

Ian nodded. "But it seems like it's time to move on. That article really made some good points and got us talking."

The response to Gretchen's article had been very positive. There were some people who said she was excusing abusive behavior, but in general it had opened up dialogue about cancel culture and second chances. #bringbackshawn started trending along with #forgiveness.

Shawn wondered if Winter's statement also prompted this change of heart. She'd shared a link to the Rolling Stone article on Twitter and tweeted a reply.

I don't have room in my ❤️ for hate. I forgive Shawn for everything that happened and feel remorse for my part in it. It's time to let go of any negativity and embrace our futures. My wish is that everyone else can put this in the past, too.

If she hadn't made it clear during their phone call that this was a self-serving move, he'd probably be touched by the sentiment. It's not like it did him any harm, so he'd chosen to ignore it.

"Tell me what you're all up to," he said to get the focus off himself.

Two of the guys were engaged, so they talked about their upcoming weddings. Matt's was in December and Jon's was the following June, though Shawn wasn't sure if he'd get invited to either. Having a beer together was one thing, but he'd have to be fully accepted back into their "club" to warrant an invite to their nuptials. He wasn't sure that he was ready to attend a big party, so he wouldn't hold it against them if he was left off the guest list.