August [j.p]

011- Peter losing Wendy

Leavin' like a father
Running like water, I
And when you are young, they assume you know nothing
But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss
-
cardigan

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Things were going pretty well for August if she said so herself.

She had come to some sort of truce with her mother where they didn't acknowledge one another and rarely even stayed in the same room as the other.

She was having the time of her life with the Marauders and discovered that she had a soft spot for Peter, could talk to Remus for hours and was convinced that in another universe she was Sirius Black's twin sister.

As for James, the butterflies in her stomach still fluttered and went batshit crazy around him but she thought that maybe she was finally moving on.

Being friends with James was hard but she was learning how to be his friend.

That was until 2 weeks into the holiday.

August was once again seated on the piano stool teaching James Potter the notes and keys that he needed to learn. It had become somewhat of a nightly routine.

His hands were calloused and hard against hers as she guided them across the keys to make the music that spoke to her soul.

It was unfair that James Potter had ridiculously attractive hands.

James had lost hope in Lily Evans, maybe it was time to accept the inevitable and move on.

It felt strange to think of it like that, he felt as if he was losing a piece of himself. He figured that it wasn't out of the ordinary since he had harbored a crush on her since first year.

Maybe it was the strangeness of letting go and the chaos of his feelings towards the girl sitting next to him that made him extra aware of her hands in his and her thigh slung over his lap.

"You're useless tonight." She sighed.

James was losing concentration every 2 minutes and they had restarted this piece what felt like 100 times.

"Sorry, let's go again."

"No, you're clearly in you head. What's bothering you so much?"

She regarded him with curiosity and he couldn't stop his eyes from wondering down her body, taking in the supple curves and her long legs.

"I'm thinking that we should revisit last summer." He said without thinking.

A sharp intake of breath was her only response as she got up from the chair and opened her window.

"Stop James, you're being cruel."

"How am I being cruel?" He smirked leaning back against the piano.

Might as well go along with it now.

"There is nothing more confusing and painful than you telling me that you want to fuck me when I'm not good enough to commit too."

James's cool indifference and lust quickly disappeared as he saw the expression on her face and heard the crack in her voice.

"And it's fucking pathetic James because I would always let you come back" she said softly as she made her way over to him and cupped his cheek. James flinched as her words struck something inside him.

"Always, if you came and told me that you wanted me and asked me to be yours, even just for a night. There's nothing I wouldn't drop to be yours."

Tears were falling freely down her cheeks and James loathed that he had made her cry. Loathed that the first time he saw her cry was because of him.

"So," she paused as she unbuttoned her pajama vest "If getting naked is the only way that I will ever be close to you." Her nimble fingers moved over the fabric quickly as James watched, unable to move his body or his mouth.

The buttons were all loose now and she pushed the fabric down her shoulders, her small breasts now revealed to James, the nipples hardened from the cold air.

"Then rip my clothes off like they bear no gravity. Tear away the useless fabric until you get to the only part of me that you desire."

Droplets of water from her eyes fell down to her collarbone and James couldn't stop the own knot in his throat from forming. He wanted to kiss away the tears and take all of her hurt and carry it himself.

Here she was, making herself completely vulnerable to him in more ways than one. James understood what the poets meant when they said tragedy was beautiful.

"Take what you need, to fill the empty parts of you."

She brushed her lips against his in the softest of touches, James felt her breasts pressed against his chest and instinctively wrapped his arms around her.

His fists clenched behind her back as he tried to make himself pull away. He tasted the salt of her tears as his lips molded with hers perfectly.

It was like two magnets pulling at one another, begging not to be separated.

August poured every ounce of herself into the kiss, knowing how destructive she was being. Knowing that this was everything but healthy, everything but moving on.

But she was tired of pretending that being friends was just okay with her.

By the work of some higher power, James pulled away and left. Refusing to look back in fear of seeing the destruction he had caused.

That night, August sat on her bedroom floor and finished composing her song.

It wasn't supposed to sound pretty and comforting, it contained the harshness of James's rejection and her own pain at being left behind standing half-naked like a fool.

It was their story, from the first day in his kitchen to the heartbreak in her bedroom. It was all the emotions she kept pent up hoping for a friendship. It was accepting that they could never be friends.

James Potter barely made it back into his bedroom before breaking down. The salt of his tears mixing with August's that were still on his lips.

He figured that he finally knew what heartbreak was now, in its full brutal capacity.

It was your soul being ripped from your body.