And In The End

28

September 2nd
Tobias's POV
After Jax's speech, the whole dining hall finished their dessert with only quiet conversations. It's as if the reminder of tomorrow sucked the life out of the room. Parents became aware that this could be the last day they see their kids. And the kids became aware of the importance of their decision. And if they left, they will no longer be Dauntless.

"You guys ready to go home?" Tris asks after we all finish. By then, families have started trickling out, letting the dining hall clear slowly. Bellamy, Blakelyn, and Ivey all nod.

"Is it okay if I go meet Kay, Ever, and Ash at the net?" River asks, clearing her throat. I look at Tris.
Your call, my gaze seems to tell her.

"Sure," she says, her eyes sad. "Just don't be out too late."

"I won't she says, standing up."

"Hey," I whisper, grabbing her hand. River looks at me, her eyes sad, too. "Be safe. I love you."

"I love you too, dad," she says, hugging me before running out of the dining hall. My gaze follows her and I watch her link hands with Ashton at the door before heading down the dark hallways. I sigh, standing up with the rest of my family. Ivey climbs onto my back as we walk back home.

"Is Ri Ri going to leave tomorrow?" she asks me, but I know everyone else hears. Bellamy throws me a sideways glance.

"I don't know, Iv," I say. "It's her choice. She might fit in better in a different faction."

"But will she leave the city? Like Auntie Lynn?"

"I don't think so," Blakelyn chimes in. And with that, the conversation ends.

I don't think I've ever seen my family so quiet and solemn. It hurts.

River's POV
Ash and I walk hand in hand to the net, slowly and quietly. The sounds of Dauntless members still fill the hallways, the Pit alive as ever. No one else seems to be aware of the impending doom that tomorrow is going to bring.

"Do you know..." I struggle to find the words. "How was..." Ashton looks at me sideways, giving me a small smile.

"I have no idea what you are trying to say, Riv." I smile too, trying to think the words through my mind.

"I- what faction?" I finally spit out. Ash's hand stiffens in mine.

"We aren't supposed to talk about it."

"I want to know if this is our last night together," I whisper, looking down.

"I don't know where I'm going to go." Something in me stiffens.

"What were your results?" I'm whispering now.

"Riv-"

"Please, Ash. It's just me."

"Dauntless," he finally says, sighing.

"So, you are staying?"

"I don't know. I almost want to leave to get away from my parents. But I also want to stay to make their life hell." I stiffen again. I'll never know what Ash has gone through, or what my Dad went through. But, it's enough to freeze my blood.

Before Ash can ask me about my results, we turn into the room with the net, finding Kayla and Everest sitting in it. We both pull ourselves into the net, sitting around in a small circle. My head rests on Ashton's shoulder while I watch Kayla and Everest's knees touch. Even after all this time, they are still 'friends.'

"This is depressing," Kayla says, looking at the three of us. I nod in agreement., my head racing with too many thoughts to say anything.

"Let's not talk about it," Everest says, laving back. I move over next to him and lie on my back as well. Ashton moves next to me, and Kayla next to Ever. The four of us look up at the stars dotting the hole in the sky.

Tobias's POV
I feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness as Tris and I sit on the couch, waiting up for River. Blakelyn and Ivey went upstairs an hour ago to go to 'bed.' Bellamy wanted to stay up with us, waiting for his big sister to get home. Glancing over at him, his nose is still in his novel but he doesn't seem to be reading.

And then the realization hits me.

It hits me hard, right in my chest.

All four of them could leave. They could all choose different factions. I could see the twins being Erudite. I could see Ivey being Abnegation. And I could see River leaving the city for good. The realization that Tris and I could be left without our children tears a hole through my chest. Though we would have each other, our children are a part of us. They made us who we are, made us better people. I couldn't live without a single one of them.

Just as I feel Tris's body slumping into mine, telling me she lost her battle against sleep, the front door creaks open. My head whips around, watching River, with her back to us, say goodbye to Ashton.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she whispers, closing the door.

"Ri is home," I whisper into Tris's ear, kissing her before prying myself out from under her. It takes her a moment, but she is behind me a second later.

"You okay?" I ask River, pulling her into a hug. She nods against my body.

"I don't know if I'm ever going to see them again." I grip her tighter. I'll never know what she's going through; I didn't lose anyone when I left Abnegation. Ri pulls back a minute later, shrugging off her jacket.

"Go on up to bed," Tris says. "Both of you." She looks at Bellamy who now hugs his sister who is lost in his large frame. Bellamy is almost thirteen and already five foot ten inches. "We'll be up in a minute."

They nod, slumping up the stairs. Tris's arms loop around my neck the moment they are out of sight. My face finds its way to her neck, breathing her in.

"I didn't think it would be this hard," she mumbles.

"I know," I whisper back.