And In The End

09

September 26th
Tobias's POV
I sit on our bed with Tris, watching her nurse my wounds with so many emotions firing through her eyes, and I can't seem to make out a single one of them. I stare at my lap, hardly feeling the sting as she cleans the wounds. I'm numb. Everything is numb. It's like I'm a shell of the person I was two days ago when we were happy, bringing our baby girl home. Everything has been ruined.

"You might need stitches on this one," Tris says, her cold voice making me jump a little. "Hold still." I feel her press against my back, this time pain running through my body. Silence pain the room once more. Tris's hands feel cold on my back like they never have before. They are devoid of feeling, of love. Love for me that I seem to have lost.

"Tris I-" I whisper.

"Don't talk," she chokes. "I'm not ready to hear it yet." Silence.

"I ju-"

"No, Tobias!" she shouts, throwing the bandages down. I turn around to find her looking at me with tears in her eyes. My heart shatters more. "You murdered someone in our home, with our kids upstairs!"

"Woah, what are you talking about?" I shout now. "I didn't kill anybody!"

"Wha-"

"We were fighting and he hit his head on the mantel but he didn't die," I choke out through the bile rising in my throat. "I took him to the infirmary. He could be dead now, but I didn't kill him."

"Tobias," she breathes out through gritted teeth. "You need to tell me exactly what happened. I don't care how painful it is. You need to tell me and you are going to tell me right now." I look up at her.

"Okay," I whisper.

"Okay."

A shaky breath escapes my mouth as I shrug o a shirt, sitting across from Tris on the bed. She sits on the other side, too far away for me to touch her but close enough for me to feel her energy. She stares at me, waiting for me to say something, to explain.

"When you went upstairs," I whisper, closing my eyes. I let my mind take me back to last night, opening every wound I've tried to seal for the past twelve hours. Everything becomes clear like it's happening all over again.

***

I watch Marcus clutch his nose as I keep my fists clenched, watching Tris hurry up the stairs. I let out a breath when I hear her close the door.

"Who do you think you are?" he shouts, spitting out blood. "I am your father. Even after you betrayed me, I am still your father an-"

"You are no father." I kick him in the side, hard. "You are a pathetic excuse for a man."

I watch his eyes turn dark like I've seen happen so many times in my darkest nightmares. Before I know it, Marcus's hands are wrapped around my body, pushing me backward. I barely notice the stinging in my elbow. Using the ground behind me, I push him off of me, rolling him over so our positions are reversed. I punch him across the face once more before standing up.
I can't do this here, not with my family upstairs.

"Get out of my house," I spit, yanking him up by his shirt. I shove him and he falls again, hitting his chin on the coffee table. His scream doesn't even register in my mind as I watch him grab the ceramic decoration in the middle, throwing it at me. I turn away, letting it hit my back, forcing me to fall to the ground. This time it's Marcus who picks me up by my shirt, getting a good punch to my face. I quickly throw my head into his torso, throwing him backward. His nails dig into my skin, clawing at my back. As I shove him off of me, I watch in terror as he falls back, hitting his head on the mantel. I watch the pool of blood around his head grow quickly. What have I done?

***

Tris's POV
I watch Tobias fall apart in front of me as he recounts last night.

"After he hit his head, I took him to the infirmary. I couldn't let him die, Tris," he whispers. Hesitantly, I reach out to wipe his tears. His face melts in my hands. "I couldn't do it; I couldn't kill him."

"It's okay, Tobias," I whisper, moving closer to hold him. He sobs into my shoulder once more. So many emotions swirl through my chest. I can't tell if I'm angry or not. I can't tell if I can forgive him for last night. I haven't been that scared since my initiation. But at the same time, watching the love of my life fall apart softens me. I want to take away all his pain. I want everything to go back to the way it was before. "He's your father. As much of a pathetic father he was, he was still your dad, Tobias. Don't beat yourself up for what you did. He deserved the ass beating you gave him. If you had killed him, you wouldn't be able to live with yourself, you know that. You are not a murderer, you are not your father."

"Tris. I almost killed a man in the same house where my kids were, where they will live and grow up. I brought violence into our house. How could I ever..." He trails off, not being able to complete his thought. I climb onto his lap, his head finding its way into the crook of my neck. My fingers run through his hair, holding him.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers.

"I forgive you." Those three little words are enough to make us both fall apart.