And In The End

12

September 27th
Tris's POV
Walking into the spare bedroom with Tobias behind me, I see a small bassinet set out for Ivey next to the bed. Careful not to wake her, I place her in it, making sure her swaddle is tight. Tobias sits on the bed, looking at me.

"I brought you a toothbrush and some clothes," I whisper, digging through the bag next to the bed. He doesn't say anything. Handing him his stuff, I head into the bathroom to get ready for bed. I watch him lean against the doorway, still quiet.

"Are we good?" he asks. I finish brushing my teeth before answering.

"I think so. Unless you don't." His face contorts in the mirror, trying to figure me out.

"Tris," he pleads. "Help me out here." I turn around to face him.

"I want to, Tobias. I want to be good so bad, to just put this behind us and move on-"

"Then let's do that," he says, taking a step closer to me, placing my hands in his. I pull back.

"Tobias, it's not that easy. I had my first panic attack in a long time last night," I say, my voice getting louder. "Just look!" I throw my hand up, showing him the bandage.

"I know, and I'm so sorry." Tears prick my eyes once more.

"I want us to be okay," I say, crying now.

"Come here," he whispers, taking my injured hand in his. He presses a light kiss to it. I pull him into a hug, wetting the front of his shirt. His tears fall onto my head.

"We're going to be okay," he says, almost more to himself than to me. I nod, just holding him tighter. I don't know how long we stay like that.

Tobias's POV
As the morning comes, Tris and I decide that we have to go back to the house. The twins are completely oblivious to what is happening. For all they know, they just had a normal sleepover with Everest. River, on the other hand, knows that something is up. I don't know for sure if she knows exactly, but she knows it's bad.

As I open the door to the apartment, I grab Tris's elbow, holding her back. "I think I have to talk to Ri," I whisper.

"That's a good idea. Do you want me to stay?" I shake my head. "Okay, I take the twins upstairs to get ready for dinner. I think we should go to the dining hall." I nod, walking in after her.

"Hey, Ri Ri, come here," I whisper, walking into the kitchen. River slumps after me, watching her feet as she walks. I grab a small box out of the fridge, two forks, and then make my way into the playroom. River sits across from me as I slump onto a bean bag, opening the box, to reveal a mini chocolate cake. River eyes light up the smallest bit.

"Ri, I have to talk to you," I say, handing her a fork.

"About yesterday," she states taking a bite. I nod, taking my own. "Did you kill that man?" I look at her, finding her eyes already on mine. "I saw the blood. And mommy was crying. And you weren't here."

"River," I say, my voice softening.

"Is he dead?" My heart thuds in my head, as I look at my six-year-old daughter, asking if I murdered someone.

"Yes," I say, looking down.

"Why?"

"That man," I say, sighing. This is way harder than I thought it would be. "That was my dad."

"Why'd you hurt him?"

"He did a lot of bad things, Ri. He hurt people, and he broke into our house."

"You hurt him because he hurt other people?" I stare at her, dumbfounded.

"I was scared, Ri," I tell her. "I made a mistake." She nods in understanding.

"Is he going to come back?" I shake my head. "Is someone going to hurt you since you hurt him?"

"No, princess," I say quickly. "We are all safe." I pull her into a hug, not wanting to let go of her. River is too pure for this world, and I don't want anything to ruin that. "Okay," I pull back. "Let's go get ready for dinner. Don't tell mommy we had cake." She smiles, running out of the room to go upstairs. I quickly put the cake away, following her up.
We all change into simple black outfits, heading out of the house not long after. I don't think Tris or I want to be there.

"You guys hungry?" I ask, swinging Bellamy's hand as I hold it while Blakelyn sits on my shoulders.

"Yes!" They both exclaim. River stays quiet, looking at her feet as she walks next to Tris. Tris throws me a worried glance, cradling Ivey who is wrapped against her chest.

"You guys go ahead," Tris tells the twins and me, handing me Ivey. "I have something to show Ri." I nod, watching them walk toward the net.

"Where are they going?" Bellamy asks me.

"I don't know, bubs." He shrugs as we continue to walk toward the dining hall. "Come on, let's go get some food."