And In The End

05

September 25th
Tris's POV
I'm painfully aware of my tighter than usual grip on Bellamy's hand as we walk down the hallway, towards the Pit to get ice cream. With my other hand, I hold Ivey's swaddled body even closer to mine. Around me, our friends walk, talking and laughing, completely oblivious to the panic Tobias and I are experiencing. He holds Blakelyn on his shoulders while keeping a close eye on River who runs with Everest ahead.

I try to keep my eyes on the floor ahead of us, not divulging into my thoughts, my thoughts of fear. River's laughs narrowly distract me, mostly reminding me of everything, how close he is to her. I have never wanted that ma near my kids, and neither did Tobias.

I know Tobias is furious, but he hides it well. To anyone, he just seems to be in 'scary Four instructor mode,' as I would have called it if the circumstances weren't so nervewracking. I know we may be overthinking this, but everything seems worse when the people you love most in the world could be in danger.

I feel my shoulders drop and I let out a sigh as we reach the Pit, crowded with people. Lots of people are good; nothing can happen with an audience. I feel Tobias's tension leave as well. We look at each other, smiling with relief.

"Come on, you guys," Christina calls. We've fallen behind the group as they make their way to the ice cream shop.

"Don't let Ri out of your sight," I whisper to Tobias. He nods and we walk after them. I can tell we are both desperate to get back to the safety of our home, holding our kids.

The glorious taste of my chocolate ice cream melting on my tongue almost distracts me from my worries. Along with that, Ivey's soft breathing against my chest is enough to keep my nerves at bay while we all eat outside the little ice cream shop. I watch as Tobias bounces Bellamy on his leg, hardly eating his ice cream himself while watching everyone else, thrown into their conversations. I watch Blakelyn next to me while he keeps an eye on River, who sits with Everest.

"Something is bothering you," Shauna whispers to me, holding Avri while giving her a small bite of her own ice cream. "You and Four have been acting weird since we left."

"I'm fine," I say, smiling, almost wincing at how forced it is.

"You don't have to tell me," she continues. "But we're all here. Everything's okay, Tris." I nod, eating more of my ice cream.

"Mommy! I'm full," Blakelyn says, handing me her ice cream.

"Give it to daddy; he'll eat it," I tell her. She nods, running over to Tobias.

"It's about the kids, isn't it?" Shauna asks. I turn my head back to her, forcing myself to stay calm. She nods in understanding when I don't say anything, dropping the subject.
I finish my ice cream, trying to be as normal as possible, talking with Shauna and Marlene. Just as I feel my nerves beginning to dissipate, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I look up at Tobias, my stomach dropping when I see his face; my breath almost stops in my throat.

"Tobias?" I whisper, looking from him to Bellamy, who holds his hand. I look around for Blakelyn, finding her sitting with Sadie. My heart stops when I realize.

"River and Everest are gone."

Tobias's POV
"Are you sure he?" Tris trails off. She doesn't have to finish her sentence for me to understand. I can hardly hear my reply through the thundering in my chest.

"I'm not sure." As she stands up, I lift Bellamy onto my hip, holding him close to me.

"Chris," Tris says, walking over to Christina, obviously in a panic. "Do you know where Ever and Ri are?" Christina smiles, nodding.

"They went off to go play by the chasm. I told them to come back in 15 minutes."

"Oh God," Tris says, walking out of the ice cream store, hugging Ivey to her chest.

"What-" Chris starts, but I walk away before she can finish, handing Bellamy to Lynn.

"Do not let them out of your sight," I say to her and Sadie, rushing off after Tris.

"Tris," I say, grabbing her elbow. She spins around, looking at me, the tears already drying on her face. "Go back and take the twins home. I'll find them. You've got Ivey too." She sees right through my lie.

"No way. If I leave, you are going to kill him. We are going to find them together. We don't even know if he has them."

"Tris-"

"No, that's the end of the discussion." She turns around, walking away from me, toward the chasm. I follow her, knowing she's right.

We rush past the crowds of people, earning strange looks from some of them. My mind races with all of the worst-case scenarios and possibilities. I can't hear anything over my racing heart.

"River," Tris calls out, relieved. I follow her gaze, finding River and Everest playing with some other Dauntless kids. I sigh. Maybe we're overthinking this, overestimating what Marcus would do.

I would like to believe that, I really would, but something in my gut tells me I can't.