nine: good kisser
R-18
ISANG LINGGO NA PAGKATAPOS NG PAGHIHIWALAY NAMIN NI MARKUS. Ako na ang umalis sa apartment namin at lumipat sa bagong apartment, Hindi nga lang kasing laki nang dati pero ayos na dahil ako lang naman ang titira.
Papunta ako ngayon sa clinic ni doctora para sa consult ko. Ngayon na lang ulit ako makakapunta, at ngayon na lang din ulit ako makakalabas.
Isolation.
The thing I feared the most happened for a week. Wala akong calls at texts na tinanggap, hindi ko binuksan ang pinto ng apartment ko. Si Jed pa ang tumulong sa akin sa pag impake noong gabing 'yon. Si Kio pala ang may ari ng apartment building na tinitirahan ko kaya nakamove ako agad noong gabing 'yon.
I felt guilty just by thinking how I closed the door at him after he helped me that night. But I can't face others when I'm having a hard time with myself.
Dahil marami akong nasasabi at nagagawa na hindi dapat.
Pagkababa ay nagtungo ako sa elevator at pinindot ang 4th floor kung nasaan ang office ng therapist ko.
Dra. Eunice M. Larsen
"Mari! Long time, come in." Ngumiti ako bago pumasok. Sabay kaming umupo, magkaharap. Napansin niya agad ang suot kong long sleeve.
"You broke it?" Tumango ako, hindi makatingin sa kaniya.
"Can you tell me what happened, if it's okay with you?" I nodded before clearing my throat.
"That day, I had a fight with my boyfriend, and he hurt me. Then, a friend kind of saw it and I told him about it when he asked, we partied, we had fun, but after I closed the door of my apartment, I just... felt empty. I thought that maybe... I'll never be happy. I will be forever a mess." I stopped talking, and she knows why.
"And after that day, have you thought of doing it again?" I nodded. I heard her sigh before taking off her specs.
"Whenever you feel the urge to end it all, try not to think about killing the current you, but think about killing the little you. The child you used to be." Napaisip ako dahil sa sinabi niya, and at the same time I tried to think about killing myself- my little self.
I closed my eyes and the sight of a little girl wearing an oversized shirt of her mom with bruised jaw and arms looking at me. She looked innocent, so innocent. I can't do it to her. I can't hurt her.
She gave me more advice, and I told her about what happened to me and Markus.
"You know? Maybe you needed that break up." And maybe, I do. Hindi naman magiging katapusan ng mundo ko kung nawala siya. He was a big part of my life, and I thought he'd be the one. But "the one" won't hurt me, love was not supposed to be draining.
"Thank you so much, doctora. I appreciate your time listening to me." She smiled.
"No problem. Oh, what happened to your 'this year'? Is it happening?" Tumango ako.
"Yep, it's been going great. I found someone to help me with it, the same person I was with that night at the club." Tumango siya.
"That person must be a great friend-"
"Ma?"
Napalingon kami ni doctora sa lalaking pumasok ng office niya. Parehong malalaki ang mga mata namin nang magtama.
"Mari?"
"Jed?"
Napalunok ako nang tumingin si doctora sa'kin at kumunot ang noo. Tumayo siya para salubungin ang anak.
BINABASA MO ANG
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Romance[SKY SERIES 4] Mari was the most honest person in his eyes. But that will never be true. They tried to get around again after a long time of being friends, being subtle with their actions with each other as they restrain each other from being more t...
