A love reborn from the ashes.

19 - Komşular (neighbors)

Can

I woke up after a few hours of a restful sleep that I had now forgotten could exist, I had not slept so peacefully for months.

I got up with enthusiasm, it was the first day of my new life, I felt I could move the world with a finger, but first I had to keep my promise to old Yusuf.

After a quick breakfast I got off the boat to go knock on his door, he welcomed me with his stern but benevolent look, he looked at me from head to toe and smiled with amusement.

He must have picked up on my effort to make myself a little more civilized.

He offered me tea as we discussed the small maintenance work that needed to be done, I was going to start on the roof that morning.

I thought, smiling under my moustache, that from up there I would have the best view of the nearby cottages and, I think, Yusuf had the same thought given the mischievous look he gave me as I headed for the door.

I quickly went to work, climbed up onto the roof and began to fix the tiles that had shifted, nailing them properly in place to prevent them from moving again in the future.

Every now and then I would cast an eye over the neighboring property, but for the moment all was quiet, no one in sight. The day was getting hotter and hotter and I was forced to take off my shirt to be more comfortable while I continued my work.

At a certain point I felt the urge to look up, there was Sanem with little Nihat in his arms staring at me.

I stopped in my turn to look at her, I saw her pass her hand in front of her face several times, as I had often seen her do when she thought she was dreaming.

She stopped suddenly as if she had regained lucidity, I saw her turn quickly to rush into the house as if she had the devil on her tail.

An amused smile was drawn on my face.

By lunchtime my work was done, and as I descended from the roof I noticed that Sanem and the baby were under a majestic weeping willow near the shore.

I put my shirt back on and once again, as if attracted by a higher power, I could do nothing but go to her.

As I approached, I noticed that the baby was restless, crying and wiggling on the picnic blanket spread out in the shade of the willow.

Sanem didn't see me coming, I saw her smiling, pulling the baby up and whispering something sweetly to him and then taking him to her to nurse him.

I stopped in my tracks, I was struck by the beauty of that scene, I regretted not having my camera with me to immortalize that moment.

My woman was lovingly breastfeeding my son, it was a work of art that aroused feelings of pride and possession, tenderness and passion, wonder and joy.

She closed her eyes for a moment, as if enjoying that moment of total intimacy with the baby, opening them again she saw me and stiffened.

It tore me apart to see her reaction every time I approached her.

I walked the few steps that separated us, I crouched down next to them, reaching out a hand to touch a tiny foot, of a poignant tenderness.

I was enchanted by the perfection of those little five fingers, who knows if Sanem had counted them the first time he had held him in his arms?

I certainly would have if my stupidity hadn't prevented me from doing so.

I sighed and sat down beside her, partly to make her relax and give her some privacy. I continued to caress the tiny foot that stiffened a bit with each passage of the thumb in a specific point.

I smiled, thinking that she was probably ticklish like I always was.

The little one came away satisfied and gurgling, Sanem lifted him on his shoulder to help him digest.

I couldn't help myself and asked - Can I hold him?

She looked at me intently, we were aware that this was definitely a unique moment: I was holding my son in my arms for the first time.

She slowly pulled him away from her shoulder to place him in my hands.

I couldn't help but smile, my eyes filled with tears as well as his, I looked at him rapturously and then placed him on my shoulder as I had seen Sanem do.

I closed my eyes raising his scent, it was something unique.

I could smell a hint of Sanem's perfume, the perfume that had made me fall in love with her and that had made me find her again after our first meeting, the perfume that had been at the center of our quarrels and misunderstandings.

But there was also the wonderful scent of a child, all children in the world smell of innocence, sweetness, joy and the little one in my arms smelled of all this and much more, he smelled for me of love, hope, home, family, warmth.

I lowered him from my shoulder, welcoming him into my arms to enjoy the sight, it was even more than my heart could think of deserving after all that had happened.
I closed my eyes, thanking Allah.

I reopened them to look towards Sanem, his face was streaked with tears of emotion, it was spontaneous for me to reach out a hand to take his, I saw her uncomfortable but she let me do it, it was a moment too good to ruin it with  any inopportune skirmish

We remained like that for an indefinite time, eyes in eyes, hand in hand and our baby in the middle of our hearts.

The voices of Denise and Yusuf, who called Sanem, rescued us from the idyll, I saw her shake her head as if  she want to clear it, she looked for a moment at our intertwined hands, as if she hadn't realized they were still there, then she got up in a hurry to go meet her friends.