A Hunger to Share ( Book One )

chapter 23

James

James kept himself busy with packing, while Ada sat in a corner playing with her fingers.

None of them had said anything since coming down here. This morning everything had been perfect. And now it was all gone.

James wanted to hate Ada and Maggie for it but he couldn't. They hadn't done anything wrong. They had history together, what Ada and him had was a couple of dates and a one night stand.

James was the unwanted here, not Maggie.

Thrusting two more shovels into a green duffle bag, he stole a glance at Ada but still didn't go to her.

After adding some silver bullets, and silver powder, James looked around to see if he needed anything else. The computers didn't show anything suspicious. It was all quiet except his head.

With a grunt, James gave up on trying to distract himself and sat down next to her. "Ada?"

She didn't answer.

He put his hand on her back, and rubbed it gently. "Ada."

Her head snapped up. "I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"How you holding up?"

She looked away from him. "I don't know."

"You should get back together with Maggie..."

Ada sighed. "Don't..."

"I won't let you settle for me. It wouldn't be right." The words were acid eating his heart but they had to be said.
James knew he'd lost her the moment Maggie walked into the cabin.

"We could be happy too..."

James shook his head. "Not the way you'd be happy with her."

"But I haven't known you as long as I've known her..."

"I don't think it would have made a diffrence." James tried to ignore the ache in his chest.

"Maybe not." Ada admitted with slumped shoulders. "But I'm not sure if I even know her anymore. What if it won't work? What if it'll be a huge mistake?"

James shrugged. "Then it won't, but at least you've tried. There would be no more what ifs."

"What about Jack? what about you?" She asked, looking at him sideways.

"Maggie and Jack were never together to begin with, so I don't think he'll be too upset."

"What about you?" Ada  repeated her question in a low voice.

"Nothing." James shrugged again. "I won't imprison you in a relationship you don't really want. I won't make you suffer just because I want you to stay. I'm not your father."

Ada winced. "But what about everything we talked about last night? I can't do this to you James..."

"Yes you can. I want you to be happy."

"What about your happines?" Her voice was heavy with guilt, and sadness.

"It doesn't matter..."

Ada frowned. "What's up with you? Are you high or something?"

He chuckled in despite of himself. "No... I don't do drugs."

"Then why are you acting so strange? Half an hour ago you wanted to rip Maggie's head off, and now you're her number one fan?"

"I'm just...being open minded. Trying to see the situation from your perspective and if I were in your shoes I wouldn't choose me."

Ada pinched her lips together. "I appreciate it, but you have no idea what it is that I really want..."

James brushed the top of her hand with his thumb. "Ada you don't have to pretend..."

"I'm not." She sounded exasperated. "the thing is..." She bit her lip. "I want both of you."

James blinked. "Oh."

"I can't choose. I don't want to." Ada said after she saw his dumbfounded expression. "I loved Maggie. I still do, but I like you too. I want to be with you too. I don't want to lose either of you. It wouldn't be fair to any of us. Don't you agree?"

James sighed. "I don't know."

"It's better than choosing sides, right?" She said hopefully.

James looked down at his boots. "Not necessarily."

"Why not?" Ada sounded confused and a little hurt.

"That's not who I am. I don't like to be with two people at the same time, and I don't even like Maggie in that way..."

"You don't have to be with her. You both like me. That's enough..."

"I don't see how..."

"Maggie probably still likes Jack..."

"So now you're dragging Jack into this?" James asked incredulously. "Should I sleep with my brother too? Is that what you want? A fucking orgy with some incest to spice things up? Jesus Ada."

"Don't be an idiot. That's not what I meant. Just hear me out, Ok? This can be the solution to our problem."

James sighed and motioned for her to continue.

"You and I will be together, and Maggie can be with Jack, if that's what they want. She, and I will also be together like old times. It's called an open relationship."

Ada talked with so much enthusiasm that it saddened James he couldn't be the man she wanted. He shook his head. "I'm sorry but it can't be us. My brother, and I don't like sharing."

"Monogamy is overrated." Ada groaned. "You're really making me choose?"

"I'm sorry." James whispered.

Ada cupped his cheek. "Open relationships aren't for everyone. Don't worry your pretty head about it." James's cheeks colored. Ada chuckled. "I'll miss seeing you blush."

James pouted. "Shut up."

Ada cleared her throat. "I guess this is goodbye." She patted his arm gently.

"Yeah but I still want to help you find the cure. Jack will probably come too, to have my back."

Ada frowned. "Why? I appriciate it, but you don't have to..."

"I want to."

"But why?" She asked, confused.

"We're still friends. I hope?"

Ada caressed his cheek. "Always so sweet." James kissed her. Ada pulled back. "James don't make this harder."

"Please." He whispered. "Please just one more time."

Ada dominated his mouth. James melted against her. She kissed him hard and long. Wheh she stopped, James wanted to weep.

"Thank you." He murmured and hid his face in the crook of her neck.

Ada ran her fingers through his hair. "We need to go up."

"Just a minute." James leaned towards a desk drawer and took out a gift box. He handed it to Ada. "I hope you like it."

Ada looked surprised. "What's the occasion?"

"Just something to remember me by."

"Like I can ever forget you." She smiled. "It's beautiful." Ada exclaimed after taking out the black jade dagger.

"It's no fancy bra, but it's the best I had to offer..."

"It's great." Ada said with glowing eyes. "Thank you."

"Be careful though. The blade is pure silver."

"No one has ever giftrd me a  dagger before." Ada hugged him. "You're amazing."