why won't you love me? [M.G.C]

22

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a/n: sorry that it's been taking me a while to post, my surgery and stuff, school, and mental health. But imma try to write now so peace :)

Michael Clifford

There was a full minute until the new year is here. Quinn and I were still weird after what happened last night, trust me, I don't blame her.

I started to blow up at her, which was wrong. But i just needed it to get off of my chest. I couldn't hold it in anymore. She was now on Luke's lap, which got me uncomfortable. So many thoughts were going around in my head which caused me to go into some sort of panic mode.

Not again.

They all started counting down from 10.. then to 9, suddenly then to 4. My breathing started to get heavier by each second. I glanced over to see Ashton and Ashley making out already, gross. Then they all cheered.

'i'm so sorry Quinn' i let out. I wasn't too loud, but hopefully enough for her to hear. Panic continued to go through my body as I quickly rushed into the guest bedroom to hopefully calm down.

I shut the door and turned on the light and felt that my heart was racing faster each second. Calum walked in and looked over at me. 'hey dude you alright?' he asked. I took one glance at him and he knew immediately.

'okay dude take a deep breath or try okay' he said as he shut the door and went over to me. My head started to spin, the demon of my mind talking back to me. I couldn't hold it in anymore, i could barely take a deep breath.

Instead, I punched the fucking wall. I didn't realize it did it until I then saw Quinn and Luke coming inside looking at me, the hole in the wall, and Calum.

'what the hell just happened in here..?' Luke asked slowly and went to me. I backed away immediately not wanting to be touched at all by anyone. 'Michael what is your deal?'

I shot my head up and looked at him and noticed Quinn analyzing the wall and then looking over at me. 'what's my problem? What's my problem!' i said a little louder than I expected.

'woah Michael, buddy. Talk to us' Luke said once again stepping closer.

'stop getting close i feel cornered!' i yelled and he immediately backed away. 'I just kept messing shit up. I can't control it anymore, I can't hold it in. You two are happily fucking together after the however many days we've been here and I can't stand it. Even Ashton and Ashlyn or whatever her damn name is!'

'Quinn, again, i am so fucking sorry about what happened between us and you said it, you shouldn't hold back a grudge about this. But honestly, go fucking ahead. I just keep on making things worse so why don't i just hide my damn feelings, break up with Crystal, and let you two be happy while i just.. crumble.. apart' i slowly broke down and slid against the wall trying to keep it together.

'it just keeps going all wrong..' i sobbed and put my head in my hands. It was all silent in the room which caused me to panic even more. I slowly looked up and everyone was gone except Quinn.

She slowly went over to me and sat in front of me pulling her knees up. We looked at each other and i immediately broke eye contact. 'michael.. you need to listen to me okay' she softly spoke.

I immediately wiped my tears and rubbed my face trying to act like I was fine. 'I don't know what you have been feeling at all these past few days, months, even years but we need to change it.' she sighed softly.

'What did you mean hide your feelings Michael', my heart barely stopped. I kept my head against the wall staring at the ceiling. I didn't want to say anything, but talking to her felt nice, felt somewhat comforting.

'I broke up with Crystal because of you.. and yes you're happy with Luke and I don't want to interfere with that. So i'm fine with it.' i somewhat lied and looked at her.

'I'm sorry, you broke up with crystal because of me??' she asked. I nodded slowly and looked away. 'oh my god'

'Happy new year?' i mumbled and looked at the wall. 'i'll fix it..'

'happy new year M..' she said softly and got up. 'if you need to stay in here for tonight go ahead, i'll see you in the morning'

She slowly walked out and shut the door. Maybe things were slowly going back together. It won't ever be the same as what it was years ago, but it'll get better.

Quinn Blake

I shut the door and saw Luke and Calum leaning against the wall looking at me. 'how did it go?' calum whispered.

I shrugged. 'good i guess'

I walked to the couch again and grabbed my drink and threw it away. Ashton and Ashley disappeared maybe to the other guest room. Calum and Luke started to help me clean up the "small" messer made in the living room and kitchen.

It was now close to 1am and Calum passed out on the couch, as usual. Luke and I slowly went upstairs back in my room and shut the door. Luke was starting to feel off after what happened earlier.

He stopped at the bed and took off his shoes. 'you still want to be with me, right?' he asked as he slowly sat down on the bed.

'of course Luke, why would you say that?' I asked as I went into the bathroom and quickly changed into other clothes. I came out and laid next to him.

'i heard what Michael said to you Q' he said as he slowly wrapped his arms around my waist as he pulled me close.

'and you're scared i'm gonna break up with you now because of that?' i softly said as i looked up at him. He nodded slowly.

'you two had the biggest connection, and there i was, just there with you guys.' he sighed and pushed his hair out of his face.

'but look where we are now..' i smiled a lil and he let out a lil 'yeah'. We slowly laid down together as he turned off the lamp light and played with my hair as he kissed my head.

My eyes started to slowly close and we both slowly fell into sleep.