Four Letters (Chaeyoung×MiSaMo)

[40] The Right One

"It was for a scholarship. Why didn't you tell me?" Chaeyoung asked the latter, the smile has long gone off her lips now. She's looking at Sana with whole guilt on her face.

After hearing from Tzuyu everything about it, the young girl felt this heavy guilt inside of her. Tzuyu told her because of one good reason and it's because she said Sana deserves better.

Sana hung her head low, fiddling with her fingers, hesitating to even spit out the words she haven't told Chaeyoung. "We don't have to talk about it Chaeyoung. Let's just go inside."

Sana stood up, deciding to run away from it. But Chaeyoung was quick on her feet to stand up and grip Sana's wrist.

"We need to talk about it Sana." She made her way to face the older woman. "You need to stop blaming yourself for everything. If you have a good reason for doing it you could've told me."

"But I didn't. I didn't defend myself because I still did it Chaeyoung. For a scholarship or not I still slept with someone else, I cheated on you." Sana was pinching herself to suppress the tears dying to come out. "You don't deserve something like that. I have to atleast pay the price."

That was what Sana believed, that no matter how good her reasons are, she still did Chaeyoung wrong and that'll never change, it will never be reasonable to cheat and she believe she's paying for that sin now.

"I was waiting you know." Chaeyoung said and held the cold hands of the older woman. "I waited for you to explain, and what I heard from Tzuyu earlier are the words I've been longing to hear from you."

Chaeyoung once again embraced Sana, because she felt the need to do so. If she wouldn't be able to bring back the time and make everything right, she could atleast repent from her regrets.

"You know what, I realized that I shouldn't have." The younger woman caressed the latter's hair. "I should've come to you and ask, I shouldn't have run away and just waited."

Sana couldn't even let out a word, because she thought that if she did then she would cry right then and there.

After so many years of hiding the truth, they both got hit of the realization that they wasted too much time procrastinating. Turns out that avoiding their issues, blaming themselves, and getting ahead of what hasn't happened yet ended up being the biggest regret of their lives.

They were both victims of the 'right person but wrong time' play of the destiny. And now, all they could do is regret and repent for not having enough courage to step up.

They were each other's biggest what if.

But Chaeyoung knows that meeting Sana was one of the most wonderful thing to have ever happened to her. Sana was the one who fixed her, and without meeting that rebel princess from Osaka. She would have wounds that'll never heal.

Chaeyoung finally pulled away from the hug after a few minutes. "Sana, no one in this world doesn't deserve to be forgiven. You deserve to be forgiven, and I've already forgiven you long time ago, and now it's your turn." She pointed at Sana. "You have to forgive yourself."

She smiled at the older woman and ruffled its hair. "It's getting cold, let's go inside." Chaeyoung dragged Sana back to the guesthouse and walked the engineer back to its room before making her way back to her and her wife's bedroom.

But instead of lying in her bed, Sana sneaked out of the guesthouse. The hardest part of all this is accepting the fact that they couldn't do anything about it anymore. She needed some air to clear her mind before resting her eyes, her heart and her soul.