Hanggang Sa Huli

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Studio

"Mom?"

Kanina ko pa hinahanap si mommy at hindi ko alam kung saan siya nagpunta. I am here at our garden. Actually, these past few months, itong garden namin ang nagsilbing comfort zone ko. This is where I'm relaxing myself out of confusion and stress.

Ilang taon na rin simula noong naghiwalay ang parents ko. It has been more than 4 years by now. Time is so fast, isang araw mahahanap mo na lang ang sarili mo na nasa isang pagsubok na hindi mo man lang hinangad.

"Umiinom na naman po ba kayo?" sabi ko nang makita si mommy na naka-upo sa bar stool na nasa bar area namin.

Agad ko siyang natanaw na pinaglalaruan ang kanyang wine glass habang nakadukmo sa bar counter. "Mom, stop drinking, will you?"

Inilayo ko sa kanya ang kanyang wine glass. Napasinghap ako nang muli niyang agawin sa akin ito. Gosh, this is stressing me out lately! Why mom suddenly interested in wine? She's not drinking this back then.

"Seah, you will always together with me, alright?"

I nodded. "Yes, of course, mom! I will never ever leave your side."

"If your father didn't cheat on us, we are complete until now." Nilagyan niya ulit ng wine ang kanyang glass.

Umupo ako sa isang bar stool kaharap nang kanya. "Mom, hindi na po ba talaga kayo magbabalikan? Things had changed, mom, and maybe his love for you didn't change," sambit ko.

"I'm sure dad is now missing us, it's been a month since the last time I visited him," I added.

Hinarap ako ni mommy. Ang mata niya ay nagrerepresinta ng lungkot at saya. There is a part of her that she's missing dad and wanted him to come back.

"You know what, Seah, it isn't easy to welcome someone that ruined you in the past. Yes, you are right, Anak, things had changed. But the pain is still here, and I think that is enough, tama na 'yung naging masaya kami dati," she smiled.

How can mom be strong like that? I mean, she is my mother and somehow I can open-up things to her. That is why I admire her for being an independent since she was by my age now.

"Kaya ikaw, don't you ever date someone, huh? Love can be like this painful."

"But, why? Love isn't supposed by what you are telling now, mom," naguguluhan kong sinabi.

"It is, Seah. They like to play your own feelings until you are slowly falling in their own arms," aniya, "just follow what I said, okay? If you don't want mommy to get mad at you." 

I slowly nodded. I don't understand why mom doesn't want me to experience that. Maybe, if I'm at my legal age, I'm most likely to recognize those things. Pero, gusto ko pa rin namang magkaroon ng freedom sa pagmamahal.

Nagpaalam ako kay mommy na aakyat na sa kwarto ko. Me and Ava will meet later, nag-aaya kasi siyang mag-mall at mabuti na lang na pumayag si mommy na sumama ako.

Binuksan ko ang pintuan ng kwarto nang biglang manlabo ang paningin ko. My vision is blurry, I can't see all the things. Kasabay no'n ang pagsakit ng ulo ko. Napa-upo ako sa sahig na hawak ang sentido ko. In a minute, everything went back to normal.

"What did just happen?" I asked myself.

This is the first time I experienced this. Am I this stress lately? But my eyes are fine and I don't have fever. Umupo ako sa kama ko at inayos ang bag na gagamitin ko mamaya sa rehearsal. Siguro, masyado lang akong na-overworked sa pag-mo-modeling.