Bad Boy Love

Chapter 39

"Get out." I screamed and threw a pillow at Ryder's direction.

I don't want to talk to him. Ever. Again.

"No." He said in a firm voice after he blocked the pillow that was coming at him.

"What do you want then? You won the bet. Now go. You got what you wanted, didn't you?" The tears were falling now. I couldn't be strong enough to hold them in. I really am weak.

I looked away from his gaze and direction. Even if I am crying in front of him, I won't give in to him. I can't. I have to hold the rest of the dignity I have. Even if it is a little.

"Ariana. You know that's -" I cut him off.

"You know what, I really don't know. I don't know anything, at all. I didn't know about the bet. The lies. I believed you. I trusted you. And you let me down. Just like everyone else. So do me a favor and go. Leave. I don't need you. I-i hate you." I whispered the last part. Maybe I am being over dramatic. But who cares? Surely not him. He pretended to care.

It went silent. The only noise was the rain and my tears falling onto the carpet. I looked outside the window, I closed my eyes and sighed.

I opened them and turned to his direction. I met his gaze and tried my best to not show much emotion. But I probably failed. His caramel eyes showed no happiness. It showed sadness and guilt and I think hurt. Why would he be hurt? He hurt me. He's tearing me apart. What could I have possibly done to him?

"Just go." I said quietly and kept my eyes on his. Meaning every word I had just said a few seconds ago. And now.

I could only feel betrayal and hurt. My heart was broken and all I wanted was to be alone. By myself. I don't want anyone's pity or comfort. I just wanted to be left alone. Alone so my own thoughts could kill me, itself. Is that so hard to understand?

He stood his place. Our eyes were still on each other. And with a final stare, he turned around.

"Does this mean, we're breaking up?" He said and I could hear his voice crack a bit. He's crying? I shook my head. Wow. I just made the bad boy cry. How terrific.

"Were we even in a true relationship to begin with?" I said and felt more tears fall. I furiously wiped them off. I need to stop crying.

He turned back around to face me. His face held an unreadable expression. But the one thing that stood out was that one tear that fell.

"When I said I liked you and asked you to be my girlfriend. I meant it. I really did. And I still do. I know I did some fucked up shit. But I never once lied about my feelings towards you." He said and walked off.

I stood there. Staring at my bedroom door. And when I heard the front door slam from downstairs. I flinched.

Well I guess I just experienced my first actual breakup. Fake or not. It hurts like a bitch.

******

I woke up the next morning not wanting to go to school. Or see him.

I just wanted to have a peaceful day without seeing him.

I know if I did see him, I would break down again. I can't control myself around him.

Okay, now I need to stop saying him.

Its Thursday. The day before Friday. Should I go to school?  I have to. I can't skip my classes. That's just too much.

I unwilling got up and walked to the bathroom. I did my regular routine. Shower and stuff. After that, I changed into light dyed skinny jeans and a white cashmere sweater. I put my wet hair into a high pony tail and added light makeup onto my face. I grabbed my tan flats.