BEA's POV
"Is there a chance that you would go out with me.. officially?"
It took me a few seconds before I realize what I just said. I was stunned, I could not move or look away and I can see in her eyes that she was shocked too.
"I'm sorry---" I stopped when I heard her speak
"Officially?" I finally managed to look away, feeling shy and afraid of what she might say next "What.. what do you mean officially?"
Hindi ako sumagot, cause I don't really know what to say. I don't even know why I said those words. I was about to ask her about J but the words just kinda slip off of my tongue.
"Bea?" She called and I slowly let go of her hand but she didn't let me "Answer me.. what do you mean?"
I let out a huge sigh and bit my lip hard before trying to speak.
"F-forget about it. I didn't mean to say that. I'm sorry."
We fell silent for almost a minute then I heard her laugh. A sarcastic one.
She let go of my hand and I wanted to stop her but she was too quick.
She stood up and all I can do was to follow her with my eyes. She wasn't looking at me, her back facing me and I tried to stop making noise, even the slightest sound of my breathing.
I felt my throat dry. I wanted to explain but I was too afraid that she'll get mad.
Well she is already mad, obviously.
"Jho..." I don't even know if she heard me. My voice felt so weak. Gusto ko nalang mawala bigla dahil sa mga nasabi ko. I want to take it back but how?
And why would I take it back when I really want to ask her that?
"Okay lang" I was so startled when she spoke that I almost jump at my seat. "I just didn't expect you to make a joke sa ganitong sitwasyon."
"But I wasn't---" she looked back at me and smiled. Not her usual smile and I've never felt so guilty my entire life.
"Are you feeling okay now? Kailangan ko kasi bumaba para icheck si lola. You can stay here."
I was about to say that I wasn't joking and I really mean those words but she started walking away from me. She headed for the door and it was a matter of seconds before she's gone. Slowly shutting the door and probably me from her life.
"Asshole" I balled my hand into fist and bit my lip so hard it might get bruised.
What have I done?
I stayed in her room for I don't know how long. I don't have the courage to go out and face her knowing I just ruined everything between us.
I stood up when I heard a sound from the door. "Jho--"
I stopped when I realized it wasn't her. It was lola's care taker. I smiled at her and bowed a little, showing some respect.
"Pinapatanong ni Jhoana kung sasabay ka daw ba sa kanya, ija."
