Snake Bite || Sapnap

31

Why did I do this? Why am I such an idiot? Why did I let this happen? These were all questions that I wished I had good answers to. Instead it was all "I don't know."

  I don't know.

  I needed to know.

  There were downsides to me being an overconfident and stubborn prick, such as only seriously worrying about how upset Nick would be with me for showing up at his house after about seven hours of driving. Now it was all I could think about, though.

  Was this the right thing to do? Probably not, but I'm here now.

  What if he did respond on Discord in the time I'd been driving? The question worried my mind, but I knew Nick. He'd take his time to cool off and would probably try to avoid me for as long as he could. I'm just making it impossible to avoid hearing my side of this conversation.

  What if I just kissed him? That's probably not a good idea. He still, for some godforsaken reason, thinks that I'm mad at him. It's a fair assumption, but no. I'm simply an imbecile who's shit with this stuff.

  Were there enough ways to call me an idiot? Not really. I was a moron, a fool, a jerk, a nitwit, a dimwit, a dunce, an ignoramus, a nincompoop, a pinhead, and a simpleton. That pretty much exhausted my vocabulary for calling myself a dumbass and it still didn't seem like enough.

What was I doing?

  That was all that I could think about: questions, whether they be important or stupid. I had told myself that I wanted to be able to give him answers, but instead I found myself filled with only answerless questions.

  Each mindless song repeated for the millionth time on the radio was accompanied by a question and every commercial break brought no answer. It was an endless loop that piled on my shoulders until I felt like I might collapse.

  I wished Will was still awake for me to talk to. He seemed to always have the answers, but was there to listen even if he didn't have them.

  More than that, I wished I could talk to Nick. We used to understand each other so perfectly, but I'd put us at such a standstill that nothing was clear. I just really fucking missed him and I only seemed to miss him more when I got him back.

  I looked out at the road ahead of me and noted how empty it was. It wasn't completely barren, but it was much calmer at night than it was in the day. I took note of the number of stars that I could see and how they fluctuated depending on the light pollution.

  I wondered if it would be nice to be among the stars, able to see them all. Clarity. It would be nice to have clarity.

-=-

  I could easily tell when I was getting closer to Orlando and I sent Dream a quick text to let him know. I felt increasingly more ill as I approached. It looked like a lovely place, but I could think of nothing but a very specific resident.

I hated to admit that I was tired. The dark sky didn't help my case. The ten hours spent in a car were exhausting, but I needed my energy.

The main streets soon turned into neighborhoods as I slowed the car to look for the house number. I don't think I'd ever felt more anxious in my life than in the moment that I saw that number in dark metal and pulled into the house's driveway.

I turned my car off and didn't give myself a chance to second guess before I walked up to the door and rang the doorbell. I could hear the sound from outside the door. My phone buzzed and I took it from my pocket.

Dream
That's you right?

Mel
Yeah

Dream
Want me to answer or want me to get Nick to?