The Moments I Recall

CHAPTER TWO

We huddle up together watching as the bus leaves. It trails dust from the dirt road, leaving only a transparent brown cloud behind.

"What happened to the storm?" I think. There is no sign of the dark clouds here, or after the entrance. The sky now a clear blue and the ground dry.

I watch as the man in navy overalls grabs the gate and pushes it to a close. My heart immediately sinking as the lock clicks. My eyes begin to fill with the type of thick tears that only blur vision, the type that sticks to the surface no matter how much you blink.

"Somethings.... wrong." I wheeze. I whip my head around and grab a boy close to me. He looks afraid. His eyes exaggerate as if he saw something he wished he hadn't. They are all afraid. Everyone around me suddenly twisting, turning, looking for something. All eyes drifting towards the little boy who starts running towards the camp. He starts a chain reaction of children following after each other. I follow the group down a gravel path. My chest burning more the further we get. Someone beside me trips, crying out as they hit the ground. I don't stop, even as my mind pleads me to. My legs moving forward on their own.

We pass large cabins and bright, colourful playgrounds littered with dozens of toys across the ground.

My eyes take note of the few of us still running. Many have stopped and been left behind. The girl in front of me is focused on a swing hanging from a tree in the distance. She stares at it for quiet a while; her head fixed on its position even as we pass it, before she skips away from the group just like the others before her.

The dirt path brings us to a wide green field. The grass's glow paired with the blue of the sky making it scenic looking. The fields of heaven in the picture made by my mind. I lead in front of the few footsteps I hear behind me. A meter in front of the metal bars I stop. Beyond the fence is a building.

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Unlike the cabins, this was a real building. It had wide glass windows on what seemed to be the backside, the side facing us.

"What is this pla...." I begin to ask turning back, but there is no one with me.

My eyes trace the walls of the flaky, faded purple building. Inside, children below five years playing with little toys lying on the floor visible through the windows.

"Preschool?" I whisper.

A little girl with skin the colour of mine stands up and stares at me from behind the glass. She looks like a younger version of me. The same fuzzy, black hair and hazelnut eyes. Same coloured skin. She locks her gaze with mine. Deep holes within them pulling me into her. I see the old building, then her eyes, then the holes over and over and over again.

"Xylia." Someone calls faintly in the distance.

"XYLIA!" they whisper loudly in my ear. My head snaps toward the sound, but one is around me. When I turn back to the preschool centre, it is gone. There is nothing there in front of me but another field and some distant trees. I blink hard, but the field stays empty.

My eyes following the fence, I spot a gate to my left exactly like the gate from the entrance.

The gate's metal is rusty unlike the rest of the fence. A large clean silver chain and lock keeps it closed. It is just a few centimetres taller than I am, the rails spaced enough so I can climb over easily. I quickly check if anyone is watching, then wrap my small fingers around the cool metal of the top rail.

My body cripples suddenly. A chill climbs down my spine, tickling me in uncomfortable ways. An uncomfortable ache but not completely painful. I yelp holding back the sour sap lodged in my throat. I feel my eyes roll back as my body falls onto the hard ground......

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A blurry sea of shiny bright green surrounds me when I wake. Blinking a few times, I lift myself back onto my feet.

"I passed out," I tell myself, but for how long? Staring at the fence, I check for wires or a power box only to find that the fence is not electric. Either way, I reach out to the gate again only lifting my pointing finger. I feel myself lightly tapping the tip on the latch that holds the gate shut before my body shudders violently. Awkward pain shooting through my body in response as my eyes roll back....

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As I wake, my head throbs, pulsing as if a thin layer of my outer skin is the only thing between it and my brain as it pants. I stand rubbing the back of my head and neck, listening to the distant voices of kids playing in the echo inside my head.

"I have to get home." I panic. I reach out again but this time moving my fingertips between the rails.

Nothing happens.

The rest of my fingers advance past the rails.

Still nothing.

"Maybe if I...." A cry tries to escape my lips, but no sound is made. Sharp pain shoots across every nerve in my arm. My spine curls in and my eyes roll back as the world grows white......

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I wake gasping for air, my lungs expanding up against my chest so fast I begin to choke. I sit up; too tired to stand, watching the trees beyond the fence lean to the wind. Grandma would shake her head at me. She'd laugh as if my behaviour isn't fuelled by childlike misconceptions like hope and fear. As if being eight didn't excuse me from being a child. But then again, what kid thought the way I do. If I could speak the same way, maybe little, white, orange-haired girls wouldn't stare as much. If I had stayed with momma I wouldn't be here, alone, watching the trees beyond the fence.