Innocent Lips

pt. four

♥

Florence

The feeling of a wet tongue licking fast on my cheek wakes me up and makes me frown in my sleepy state. I try my hardest to lift my arm to push whatever this thing is licking me away but my arm feels heavy from my tiredness.

"Go away." I mumble, my eyes still closed.

When the creature doesn't stop, I peek one eye open to see a small, black and white chihuahua staring back at me with big eyes.

I close my eyes again, not thinking to much of it, but when I realise there's a dog in my bed, my eyes shoot open and I sit up.

The dog sits on my lap, staring at me whilst I stare at it back.

Confusion fills my brain and I'm questioning wether or not I'm actually here or if it's a dream.

I don't remember getting a dog?

"Who are you?" I whisper, my eyebrows pulled into a frown. I don't know why I'm asking a dog who they are, it's not like it can talk back.

The dog just gives me a cute and tiny lick on my hand which makes me smile a little.

"I see you've met Kkami." my whole soul jumps out of my body when I hear a familiar voice I haven't heard in years.

I shoot my head up to see a figure leaning against my bedroom door. My jaw drops when I see it's the one person I didn't want to see, but I can't help but get lost in his appearance.

A small smile is playing on his big lips. The top half of his now long blonde hair, different from the short brown hair I was used to, is pulled back. His dimples are prominent, easily making me feel weak. And his usual good style makes me jealous; baggy blue jeans and a white jumper.

My whole stomach sinks but it's a mixture of surprise, dread and the old feelings I felt a few years ago making an appearance again.

I get lost in him, feeling like I want to cry of sadness, anger but also from... missing him.

"Hi." he breaks the silence with a breathy voice.

Hearing his voice sends bolts of electricity through my body and it leaves me with my mouth agape, not knowing what to do or say.

One half of my brain is telling me to tell him to 'fuck off' and leave the room but the other half is telling me to return his greeting.

"Um, h-hi." I manage to get out with a croaky voice from all of the emotions I'm feeling all at once.

"Look I-" he starts but he's then cut off by my brother.

"Hyunjin! Help me with breakfast will you?" he shouts and I take this as an opportunity to rush out of my bed and run into my bathroom.

I let out a massive breath I didn't realise I was holding when I shut the door quickly. I lean against the white door and close my eyes.

Tears prick behind my eyelids and I inhale a shaky breath. My heart rate suddenly increases and my hands start to shake.

I shake my head rapidly, I don't want an attack. Not now.

Moments of that day replay in my mind and I can't get them out. They're stuck in my brain like someone had forged them on.

I'll try my best to avoid him. After what he did and said, I don't want to be around him. Why would he even try to make a conversation if he made it clear that he meant what he said?

I open my eyes, my vision is blurry but I manage to make my way to my shower. I turn on the hot water, hoping the relaxing feeling will distract my mind.

After washing my body, face and hair, I step out and wrap a fluffy white towel around me. I take in my appearance when I reach my mirror above the sink, my eyes red and puffy from a few stray tears that left my eyes in the shower.

I shake my bad thoughts away, brush my teeth and head back to my bedroom, thankfully he left so I get dressed in an oversized t-shirt and some leggings.

I brush my wet hair through and just leave it down to dry. I add some makeup to hide the fact I've been crying, I don't want Felix worrying. I finally add some deodorant and perfume before heading out of my bedroom.

When I'm out in the hallway the voices of my brother and Hyunjin enter my ears and I gulp.

Just ignore him, you won't be hurt if you do.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door that leads to the open plan kitchen and living room area. Both of their heads shoot up and I give a very small smile before making my way to the kettle to make a tea.

Felix is at the oven, cooking some sausages and bacon whereas Hyunjin is sitting on the counter which happens to be next to the kettle.

I avoid his eyes that are burning into me, focusing on adding water to the kettle and letting it boil.

As I make my tea, trying my hardest to tame my shaking hands, they make conversation but I tune it out, not wanting to get involved.

"Do you wanna come, Flo?" I hear Felix ask and I turn around to face him with confusion.

At my confused face he chuckles. "We're going out with a few mates tonight because uni starts tomorrow, I asked if you would like to come."

I frown at the word 'mates' because Felix told me Hyunjin was his only one. I guess he's just closer with Hyunjin.

The thought of going out makes my skin crawl. New people scare me and I feel like if I go with them, especially my brother, I'll feel like a burden.

"Where are you going?" I ask which might help with my decision.

"We were just thinking of going to a pub and grab a few drinks. If you don't wanna come it's fine, I'll understand." he smiles warmly at me and goes back to cooking the food.

I watch my hand stirring my tea with a spoon, thinking about Felix's offer. I could go, make new friends and enjoy myself or... I could go, make an absolute twat of myself and my brother will never want to go out with me again.

I shake that scenario away, I want to make new friends and how am I supposed to make them if I stay inside?

"Okay, I'll come." I smile at him, accepting his offer.

Felix smiles back, plating up some food, and I can feel Hyunjin's eyes on me but I ignore it.

"Bon appétit." Felix hands me a plate with some bacon, sausages, egg and beans on it.

I thank him and choose to eat mine on the sofa, next to Kkami, instead of with the boys at the kitchen island.

Drowning out their conversation, I watch TV instead. I also start to feel nervous, I can feel it in my stomach. What if they don't like me? What if I annoy them? What if I disappoint Felix?

I don't want to be the reason Felix never goes out again.