The Way I Need You

Chapter 17

KAO

To: Pete
Can't join you, need to meet James for an assignment.

I hit send and buried my face in my arms.

Aaaah Kao what have you done? He's your friend, you're not supposed to catch feelings!

I know from the start that Pete is different, he already caught my attention way before we started talking. He's Handsome Heir Pete, everyone notices him.

But when we started to talk and I get to know him more, I don't know, he just seems a totally different person for what people perceive him to be.

Okay admittedly, he is really blunt, very confident and knows what he wants. But he is also caring, observant and generous. He is more of an action kind of guy than words, just like when he treats me a day after my birthday. He didn't say much, he just does what he thinks will make me happy, and boy was he spot on.

Even from the start I feel different around him, but I thought it was just because he has a different personality with my other friends.

But as the time passes by and the longer time I spend with him, little by little I realize that it's a totally different feeling.

I didn't realize it at first, because I've never really like anyone before, neither a guy nor a girl. Okay admittedly I find a few girls cute but that's it. I have never been in a relationship or even like anyone in a romantic way.

As Pete and I started to get close, I notices more things about him. The different way he frowns, just a small quick frown when he's curious about something while when he's starting to get annoyed or frustrated the lines in between his eyebrows are more prominent.

The way he looks whenever he cooks, as if I'm seeing a totally different Pete. He is so relaxed and looks so thrilled about what he is doing but still very meticulous about it, always the perfectionist.

I like making him smile and laugh, even though sometimes it's on the expense of him making fun of me it's okay, as long I hear his laughter and see his gummy smiles.

Getting excited whenever he will hang around the café and looking forward to our Friday cook out. Even the way he checks on my sugar intakes doesn't make me feel annoyed, it makes me feel like he cares for me more.

It was last Friday night as we lay on the hotel bed in Red Town, I finally realized and admitted to myself what I am feeling all along. I was just watching him sleeping with only the night light illuminating his face. I wanted to touch his face, slowly extending my hands towards Pete face thinking that this is what I want to see every night before I fall asleep, and that stop my action midway.

And I wanted to cry then and there, but I stop myself and just look at him the whole night remembering every little feeling that I thought was just simple closeness, but now realizing it was not.

I didn't sleep a wink that night, I'm still coming to terms with my feelings when Pete finally wake up. It made me feel self-conscious and a bit jumpy around Pete, thinking that he will discover my feeling about him.

When I took a shower, I talk myself into just do whatever I do before and stop thinking about it for that day. Thankfully my little mantra at the bathroom work and I was more relax or more likely I hid my nervousness perfectly that day and act as if I didn't realize that I like Pete more than just a friend.

I tried to control my giddiness when he liked the keychain I gave him, and I think I totally fell more when he bought three dozen of egg tart so I can bring it to the kids when I said it was really good and I wish I can buy more to bring home. See I told you, he is nice, caring and generous.