Young Magic (The hobbit love story)

Chapter 18: Those feeling wheren't for him

🚨very very minor sexual content🚨

Salacia POV

As I walked away from Gandalf, I had a confused and saddened feeling in my chest....it was between Fili and I. Ever since that night two weeks ago...he hasn't looked at me the same. Gandalf had spoken to me the next morning about it wanting to know what happened...however I was utterly lost and confused.

*two weeks ago*

I woke up, hearing the company moving about. I glanced over my shoulder and saw that Fili was siting up, he looked exhausted. "Fili? Did you not sleep?" I asked sitting up. He glanced at me, but his expression was slightly cautious and afraid. "How could I after what had happened last night?" He asked. I had no idea what he was talking about...I have no recollection of something dramatic happening. "What are you talking about?" I asked. "Wh-what am I talking about?!?! Salacia...something...something got inside you and...possessed you!!! Gandalf had to put some weird black potion on you while Thorin, Dwalin, Bofur and I held you down!!!" He yelled. 'W-what?' I thought backing up as he angrily stood. "It was horrifying Salacia! I thought you died at one point!" He said. "FILI!" I heard Thorin yell. Suddenly I was lifted by my waist off the ground by the dwarvish King. "Obviously she does not recall or understand last night events, do you honestly think lashing out at her because you don't understand will help anything?" He asked in a strict tone. Fili began to speak but growled, "Salacia...I'm sorry I yelled at you, I just need to be away from you for a little while as I sort this out." He said as he walked away. I felt tears well up in my eyes, "I-I..." I stuttered as tears fell while I watched him walk away. Suddenly a strong thumb wiped away my tears. "Do not cry, he is just...getting his head into sorts." Thorin said grinning at me. "H-he said you where one of the ones that held me down....what happened to me?" I asked holding onto the fur part of his coat. He sighed, "all I know is what I saw, and what I saw...I don't understand. It was terrifying though. I have a feeling Gandalf would be able to answer your questions better than I." He said rubbing my cheek caringly before leaving to finish getting his things. I turned around and spotted Gandalf. I ran to him and stood in front of him, I didn't even need to speak for him to know what I wanted. I'm guessing my red watery eyes and panicked expression gave it away. "Salacia, I want you to put a protection spell on yourself. Casting a shield around your mind, soul, and body." He said. I nodded, not even wanting to argue, "b-but what happened to me..." I asked. "Someone is trying to infiltrate your mind, take over your body, control your abilities." He said simply. I ran my fingers through my hair, "I don't want to know anymore..." I said quietly. I went to sit on my own while I cast a protection spell into my body.

*present time*

Over the course of the last two weeks...it's been tense. Though nothing even close to what happened that night has happened since then. Thorin has been lashing out, rarely at me, rarely meaning he did once and that because I sneezed on his pipe by accident. I've also noticed Bilbo giving Thorin cold glares as well as spending a ton of time with Bofur...which made me interested in what was going on there. And Fili...Fili rarely spoke or looked at me. Kili did, all the time...but Fili was much more distant.

I walked around Beorns house when I stopped, hearing the brothers speaking. "Kili...I don't know what to do about Salacia...I hate keeping away from her like this but I'm so scared that I wouldn't be able to help her, or even mentally handle what could be thrown at her!" I heard Fili said. I instantly felt terrible. "Do...you still love her?" Kili asked. "Yes...I do. But I don't want to be pulled into whatever she's getting dragged into!" He said. "I mean...if I where brought up like her, had her abilities and mindset then maybe I could handle it but she is perfectly sane about it and I'm losing my mind!!!" Fili yelled. I suddenly heard a slap and a grunt. "Agh, why did you do that?!?" Fili growled. "You need to calm down! Look, this is Salacia we are talking about, if we calmly explain to her what is going on, and that you don't think you can handle being in a relationship with her right now, she will understand." Kili said. I sighed, "I do..." I said. I rounded the corner looking at the ground. "S-Salacia....where you listening?" Fili stuttered. "Yeah...I was. Fili don't feel bad about it...I would have been shocked if you could handle it." I said, my voice was becoming shakey. "Salacia I'm sor-" "save it...this isn't the first time who I am has scared people away from me." I said, my voice slightly choking. "What?" Kili asked. I sighed and reached forward grabbing Filis hands, not looking at him. "This doesn't mean we aren't friends anymore right?" I asked. Suddenly he hugged me tightly, I didn't move. "Of course we are! I wouldn't want to lose you in a million years!" He said. I nodded and backed away. I kept a my vision to the ground and turned on my heals before walking away. As I passed through the living room where everyone else was, I got quite a few looks. "Sal, are you alright?" Bilbo tried to reach out to me. I looked up and saw Bofur and him sitting rather too close for friendship. I grinned sadly at the two friends I had made and shook my head and kept walking. I made my way outside to where Beorn kept his horses. Inside I found an empty stall with lots and lots of fresh hay. I wiped my nose and eyes only for more tears to flow. I jumped into the hay and curled up, pulling some of it over me like a blanket. Knowing I was alone...I allowed myself to cry...which I hadn't exactly done in a while. The last time I cried was in Lothlórien. I placed my face in my arms and tried to quiet myself down. "Salacia..." I heard the deep voice of Thorin. "Go away I'm crying." I bluntly stated. "I can see...and hear that." He said. "Why are you in here don't you have people to boss around?" I asked wiping my eyes. He sighed "Your going to get sick if you sleep in here, I'm looking out for my strongest fighter." He said. I laughed slightly, "now, what's wrong? Why are you in here?" He asked. I sniffed and wiped my face before turning to him. "I don't wanna be near Fili right now okay?" I said. "What happened actually? After you stormed out they came out after you looking panicked but couldn't find you." He said. "...Fili is scared of me so he doesn't want to be with me anymore." I said as I proceeded to take out the braid Fili had given me. "So your reaction is to run to a barn and cry in a pile of hay?" He asked. I frowned. "Okay. Piss off it's the only place that's private." I snapped. Thorin laughed slightly. "I was only kidding. And well...as for Fili...he has not experienced very many...scary things. He's not used to it and doesn't know how to handle it. Especially not what he witnessed happen to you." He said climbing onto the pile of hay and sitting down. "Hah...yeah. And I'm sure you do don't you?" I asked sarcasticly raising an eyebrow as another year fell. Before I could wipe it away, Thorin leaned over and did just that. I blushed slightly as he leaned awa. I shivered from the cold air flowing through the barn. "Yes. I do...more than I wish." He said. I sniffed and wiped my nose. "What happened to you...if you don't mind me asking." I said shivering again. He sighed, "I'm not telling you a damn thing until you come here." He said. I grinned slightly and scooted closed to her. He opened one side of his coat and wrapped it around me as I settled. I must admit, It was a lot warmer. I finally gave up and just down right cuddled up to him. He cleared his throat and looked at me. "Well, the night this story was told you never heard it, you went to bed before all of us, so I will tell it too you." He said. Thorin then began telling me of the battle to reclaim Moria from the orcs, and the origin of his hatred for Azog. I listened intently as he spoke of how Azog had cut off his grandfathers head and tossed it to his feet. I was horrified...I had never realized all the hardships Thorin had faced. Smaug...his grandfather...his father going missing. I stayed quiet, my head still rested in his shoulder. Oddly enough, losing Fili doesn't hurt anymore. I felt like my heart was shattering at first...but being comforted by Thorin...even if that being him telling me stories of his gruesome past...it was nice. The face he came out and took the time to make sure I was okay was nice. He continued talking about when he lived among men as a blacksmith. I looked up at him, watching his lips move as he talked. 'He held me down...just like Fili had...he saw all the things Fili saw...and he never treated me different other than a little more caring. He didn't avoid talking to me, or avoid touching me. He wasn't afraid of me.' I thought to myself. I watched his face, he was handsome...there was no denying it. And I had lied earlier...I actually loved darker hair. Sure we bickered some times...but there hasn't been a single time we haven't made up. We have the same sense of humor and he was more mature, hot headed and snappy though...I couldn't lie to myself, what I had told him was true, I did kinda have the hots for him when I first met him, however over this journey those feelings I've suppressed and didn't pay attention too...I didn't think he was right for me. So I changed those feelings and pushed them towards Fili. However they never where for Fili...I actually managed to trick my own heart into taking my strong feelings for Thorin...and moving them to Fili. Suddenly he looked down and stopped speaking. "What?" He asked. I got out of his jacket and slid down the hay pile. "I'm going to be right back...just...stay here okay?" I asked. "Alright..." He said. I smiled then sprinted back into Beorns home and slid around the corner running to wear Bilbo and Bofur where sitting. "Bilbo!" I whispered and slid to my knees. "Yes? Are you alright?" He asked, Bofur sat up as well. "Oh yeah I'm fine I'm over it. I have a questioooon." I said. " hm?" He asked. I looked at Bofur then to Bilbo. "Are you two...like..." I asked. Bofur got a cheeky smile on his back and nodded, bilbo blushed furiously and followed. I smiled, "THAT. IS. ADORABLE!" I squealed and tackled them to the flood in a hug. "If you guys get married, I'm coming to your wedding and making it amazing okay?!?!" I said. They laughed and sat up, "that'd be a pleasure lass." Bofur said. "So...is...Thorin like up for grabs then?" I laughed...acting very nonchalant. "Well I suppose so yes, I'm over him." He said. I smiled, "wait what happened with that anyways?" I asked. "All Thorins Been doing this entire trip has been yelling at me, doubting me and treating me less than him." Bilbo snapped. "What an ass~ alright! I just wanted to know because I saw you two earlier and was just wondering." I said standing only for Bofur to grab my wrist and pull me back down. "And you and Fili? Where does that stand?" He asked. I sighed, "uh, it's not a thing anymore but I'm not sure where we stand." I said. "Alright lass, goodnight." He said. I smiled and stood before running back to the barn. I felt my heart pounding. I entered the barn and ran to the stall I found Thorin laying back with his arm over his eyes. "Thorin!" I said loudly. He flinched and popped up. "What?!" He asked. "I need to ask you a dumb question." I said. "You do that quite a lot. What's that?" He asked. I rolled my eyes, "do you still have feelings for me?" I asked. I was terrified of his answer and my stomach was in knots. "Excuse me?" He asked. "Do...do you still like me..." I asked quieter. I sat his cheeks go the tiniest tint of red, "Well I mean...yes...the feelings never went away." He said. I smiled widely, "mahal...I am so stupid." I laughed covering my face. "What?" Thorin asked sliding down the pile of hay and standing infront of me. "Why are you stupid?" He asked. "It's hard to explain...but I kinda used magic on myself to deny my feeling for you because I didn't think you would be good for me, I don't know why I thought that but I did. The way my magic worked it was they didn't get rid of the feelings they moved them to someone else...making me feel for them...what I actually felt..." I said. "For me?" He asked. I nodded shyly. "So how you felt about Fili, wasn't actually real?" He asked. "No...it was real...just warped in a way I really am not sure how to explain it. "No I think I understand...so does this mean you actually love m-mmph!" I cut him off, grabbing his face and pulling it down pressing my lips to his. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled myself closed. I felt his strong arm around my waist and him tangle his fingers in my long silky hair pulling me closer to deepen the kiss. With seemingly no effort Thorin then moved his arm around my waist under my butt lifting me up off the ground. I smiled and wrapped my legs around his thick muscular waist. He carried me back onto the pile of hay and laid me on my back, hovering over me. Soon we pulled away for air and looked at eachOther. That...these feelings in my chest where never like this when I kissed Fili...I could feel my energy and soul blossoming with bliss and happiness. I leaned up and pecked his surprisingly soft lips. He grinned at me before he suddenly kissed my cheek, moving down to my jawbone before peppering soft kisses on my neck. I let out a small gasp as I suddenly felt him gently bite and suck a soft spot on my neck. I ran my fingers up the back of his hair and grabbed it gently. I felt him smiled against my skin. I let out a small moan as I felt him drag the tip of his tongue up my necks and law before kissing me once again. I felt his warm hands move their way under my shirt. His hands where burning against my cold skin. I felt his hands move higher and higher until he moved over my right breast...and let me tell you, my breasts where not small in the slightest. I felt him squeeze it before pinching my nipple slightly. I squealed and giggled, he smiled as he kissed me again. I pulled him closer, allowing his hands to explore my torso...until we heard someone come in. I stopped and our eyes widened. We proceeded to franticly but quietly dig ourselves under the hay, hiding. We peaked through the hay and saw a large man, it was Beorn. We heard him grumbling to himself, the word dwarf was mentioned more than once...and followed by curse words...more than once. We watched him move about the barn before leaning. We popped our heads out of the hay and looked at eachOther. I tried my best not to laugh but failed, he smiled and covered his mouth. "That was really really close." I whispered. He smiled and nodded. "We should probably go back to the house, we need our rest." He said. I nodded. He jumped out of the hay and grabbed me by the waist pulling me out since I managed to get myself deeper than him. As we walked I giggled and pulled strands of hay out of his hair, and he did the same for me before we went into the house. I followed him over to where my bag was and he brought his bed roll over to mine. We laid down on our backs, not cuddling, I already figured he wouldn't be one for doing such a think while his company was around. I threw an arm over my eyes and closed them, my other arm beside Thorin over my stomach. Before I went to sleep I however felt him grab my hand over my stomach. I grinned and turned his way, perfectly content with only holding his hand.