Love is a Broken Window | Cricky [C]

49 | Dedication

| Chris' POV |

I set the mic onto the stand, leaning on the stand for support. Looking out into the audience, I saw hundreds of young faces. Sometimes it hard to realize, that these kids don't know a damn thing that goes on, yet they look up to me so much. I'm not worth looking up to, because I'm a fucking asshole. I hurt Ricky is the worst way possible! 

Glancing over to what usually is his side of the stage, I felt a pain in my heart. It was empty; both the stage and my heart. Without him, nothing seemed right, or... worth it. 

"Thank you all for bearing with us tonight." I said as I caught my breath. "As many of you may know, our guitarist, Ricky, couldn't do the show tonight because he was too sick. On his behalf and the band's, I'd just like to thank you all for understanding and sending him so much love. Though you might think so, all those tweets and posts really do help the healing process. So thank you, and this next one is for Ricky. This song is called City Lights." 

~

After the show, I wasn't all too up for meeting anyone or sticking around. I headed straight to the bus and started taking off my makeup in our small bus bathroom. The door was open so I could hear if the guys came back. Plus even I get claustrophobic at times. Not like poor Ricky though. 

As I leaned over the sink, with water dripping off my face, I took a moment to try to really catch my breath. I suddenly felt two thin arms wrapped around my hips. I knew it was Ricky, because the others hadn't come back yet. His skin brushed against mine. He was so cold. 

Ricky hesitated, and started to pull away. "Sorry. I shouldn't touch you, I'll get you sick." 

I lightly guided his hands back to my body. "It's okay. I don't care if I get sick, I just want your touch." I ran a towel over my face, then combed my fingers through my hair. I turned to face him, seeing how sick he looked in his eyes. "I'm sorry for earlier." 

"It's okay. I don't care." He said genuinely. 

"Really?"

"Yeah... Is it true what everyone was tweeting me and stuff? That you dedicated City Lights to me?" He asked. 

"Yes, I did. And, I still feel terrible for the way I treated you." I confessed. "I mean it when I say I love you."

"I mean it too." Ricky responded. He rested his head against my beating heart. 

I kissed the top of his forehead. "Let's start over, okay? Forget about New Years, forget about the hookup. Let me take you out on a real first date and we'll start new." 

Ricky looked up at me. He put his cold hand in mine, intertwining our fingers. "I like that idea." 

"Good. Whenever you're better, I'll take you out to eat. For now, you need to go rest." 

He yawned. "Okay." 

I kissed his forehead again. Ricky then left and headed back to his bunk. Luckily, he managed to get back in before the guys came back. I wanted them to assume he was sleeping so they don't bother him. Everyone began getting settled in so we could hit the road and head to the next city. 

Devin came back by me. He stopped through the bunks and peaked into Ricky's bunk first. A smile hit his face, then he met his eyes to mine. "You two made up?" 

"How'd you-"

"I know because he's back in his own bunk. He was sleeping in mine earlier, since it makes him feel better." Dev explained. "Well, I'm glad you guys are back on track." 

"Me too. I think we finally got over our rough patch, and it's going to be good from here out." 

"I'm sure." He smiled. "I'm going to go call Shi before it gets too late." 

"Okay, I'm hitting my bunk. Goodnight."

Devin shot me another sweet smile. "Goodnight, Chris."