Just a crush

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Louis and his mum were sitting on the couch watching goofy cartoons, just like they used to do when Louis was young. His mum felt horrible this morning, when she woke up. She had called Louis and asked him to spent some time. He immediately agreed, she was his mum after all and he loved her with his entire heart.

His mum was a bit cuddled up next to him. She was feeling cold and Louis' warm body made her warmer.

Louis didn't really concentrate on the movie. All he could keep thinking about was his mum. He noticed how she cuddled closer to him and how her breaths were beginning to slow down. He was scared but so happy they were together at that exact moment.

It was dark outside, the only light coming from the streetlights through the window and the cartoon playing on the television. He heard the cars passing by on the street and the he heard the sound of rain on the windows while he cuddled his mum even closer. He placed a soft kiss on the top of her head and breathed the smell of her perfume in, for what he thought would be the last time.

His mums breaths slowed down even further until they eventually stopped. The only sounds left were those from outside, muffled by the windows.

He just kept tracing his fingers through her hair, as if that would fix everything and all of this wasn't true. This wasn't happening.

He stood up and slowly laid her down on the couch. He closed her eyelids and sat down on the ground, next to her. His eyes were scanning over every little detail on her face. The long lashes that caressed her cheeks, the soft wrinkles in her forehead and her soft pink lips from which she spoke and had comforted Louis thousands of time.

He had felt numb and hadn't cried until he thought of all the memories. Every day after school, seeing her sitting at the table with two cups of tea and self bakes cookies. She always made the tea perfect and her cookies were the best he had ever had.

He was brought back to the present as he felt hot tears streaming on his cheeks. They tastes salt as they landed on his small lips. He scooted closer to the couch and tangled his fingers in her hair again. Louis leaned forward and placed a small kiss on her cheek which was wet from his own tears. He backed down again and rubbed the tears of her cheek with his thumb. He felt a sharp pain in his heart, it felt like someone cut it with a knife. And when he tried to talk, only a small whisper came out.

"I love you mum, goodnight. If we think about each other we will dream about one another." He said the sentence she always said before he went to sleep when he was a kid.

He walked over to the door and glanced one last time over at her, she looked peaceful. He opened the door, walked through it and closed it again. As he grabbed his phone to call the hospital he heard someone calling his name. "Louis, Louis please stop crying. It's okay." He couldn't see who was talking to him. He turned around but no one was there.

Louis started walking back towards the door, towards his mum. She was the only one who could be calling him. He opened the door and was met with a bright shining light. He squeezed his eyes shut before slowly opening them again.

"Lou, it's okay. I'm here. It is me, Harry." When he had fully opened his eyes again he saw Harry's worried face. He looked around, seeing his and Harry's bright room, their closets and their shoes standing next to the wall. He was confused, just a minute ago he was... fuck another nightmare again.

He quickly grabbed Harry's big hand which was resting on his waist and looked him in the eyes. Everything was a bit blurry due to the tears in his eyes, but he could easily make out those shining green eyes in front of him.

"Again, baby?" And all Louis could do was nod. Ever since his mum had told him, he kept having these horrible nightmares. He would cry and scream while he slept until Harry noticed and woke him up.

In the day he spent a lot of his time with his mum and the rest of his family. Enjoying their every second like nothing was wrong. But he was always scared something would happen with her, that it would happen. Every time he went back home at the end of the day, he would hug her, tell her how much he loved her and breath in her smell, to remember it for eternity.

And then at night, when he was exhausted, he always had these dreams. They would be doing something casual and she would suddenly stop breathing. It broke his heart to see, every single time. And when he woke up again, he was even more exhausted than he was before he went to sleep.

He crawled in Harry's chest and just silently cried until his eyes were burning and his cheeks were pale. Harry always tried to comfort his, saying suiting words in his ear, telling him how much he loved him and that he was there for him. He tried to rub away the tears streaming down Louis's cheeks, but without success, because as soon he had rubbed them away new ones were already coming.

Louis felt small and vulnerable but he also felt that he had to be strong, mostly for his mum. She was having a way harder time than him and here he was, crying. When he saw his mum he told himself not to cry, not in front of her. He needed to be strong for her. But it was hard and sometimes a tear slipped past. When Jay noticed and Louis saw the hurt in her eyes, he quickly whipped it away and continued as if nothing was wrong.

Now, Louis was laying crawled up against his boyfriends chest, not even crying anymore, only shaking. It was as if he was crying without tears coming out.

Harry carefully laid him off his chest to stand up. Louis softly whimpered, reaching his arm out to touch Harry. The older boy looked at him, grabbed his hand and said in a soft voice: "Don't worry baby I'll be right back. I just have to get a sweater for you hun." He walked away, into their closed, and came back with one of his sweaters.

Louis loved when he wore Harry's clothes. They were always way too big, which caused him to have sweater paws. Harry walked over to the small boy laying on the bed and slipped the sweater over his head. After, he grabbed the small hand of the boys and pulled a bit, trying to get him out of bed. Louis protested, but stood up nonetheless. The pink sweater fell down, just long enough to cover his bum, and Louis smiled at the feeling of Harry's hand wrapped around his while they walked down the stairs and towards the kitchen.

Harry lifted Louis up and placed him on the counter, he kept his hands on Louis' waist and rubbed small circles on the side of his tummy.

"What does my pretty baby want for breakfast?" Harry asked while giving Louis a small smile, trying to make him feel a bit better. "Just cereal is good, maybe we have some coco puffs left." Louis shrugged, his mood not really changing.

Harry sighed and wanted to walk away to get Louis some coco puffs. But he stopped when he heard Louis talk again, his voice a bit louder and less sad this time. "And, I want one more thing."

Harry stood between his small legs as he asked him what it was that he wanted. Louis smiled his little sunshine smile before leaning in a bit. "This." He leaned in further and pressed his thin lips against his boyfriends bigger ones.

It was a soft kiss. Gentle and sweet. But somehow it made all of Louis' worries fade away for a minute.

The only thing on his mind at that moment was his beautiful boyfriend and his lips attached to his own, his hands on Louis' neck and his eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks.

They slowly pulled apart, looking one another in the eye. Green met blue and that was all that mattered for the world.

Harry wrapped his arms around the tired, small boy. He snuzzled his face in the boys neck and felt his soft hair caress his cheeks. Louis pressed his forehead against Harry's bare chest.

It was not the end, not yet. And it would be alright. If it wasn't alright, it was not the end.

Hiii,

Okay, the beginning was quite sad. Sorry bout that. I kinda try to write out of my personal experience of when I lost someone I loved...

Anygay pls comment and vote :)

Tpwk
All the love <3