Son of the sun

chapter 6

One more 'I love you'

"You kids ready" andromeda asked. Everyone was at the Tonks residence, everyone was equally as quiete. Nymphadora took care of the three youngest to not overwhelm the adults. It was march twenty seventh. Regulus sirius and remus all a complete wreck. On this day no less than seven years ago james was turning eighteen . Today he would have turned twenty four and in four months harry turned four. Marlene would have turned twenty five in august and the twins four in july.

"Yea we should get going so where not there too late" remus sighed. Regulus nor Sirius dared to speak. Lucius took narcissa hand while ted and nymphadora took harry draco and Rosalie by the hands and to the car. Andromeda linked arms with regulus as they all walked out. Regulus andromeda     harry remus and Sirius in one car. Narcissa Lucius Rosalie nympadora and draco in another while ted apparated to the cemetery setting up a small picnic.

"We should get flowers"regulus said. he was in the passenger while andromeda drove and remus and sirius where in the backseat with harry. "ted already got you don't need to worry about anything today. i've got harry as well he'll stay the night with me" andromeda said. regulus nodded never averting his gaze from the road ahead.

"lucius i'm sorry for everything i've done to you i know it's not easy on you in any way and i truly am sorry" narcissa said. it would be the first time in over seven months she went to see marlene's grave. she always knew it hurt lucius to see her go to marlene's grave so she stopped for her husbands sake. something he never wanted her to do.

"you don't need to apologize love. i know you love her with everything in you and she loves you as well. you can still come here whenever you like i'm never going to stop you" he said. she softly smiled, lucius held her hand kissing the back of it. malfoys weren't known with marrying for love, somehow lucius loved narrcissa even if she was in love with another.

"hey james hey lily miss mckinnon" sirius smiled looking down at his three best friends graves. there they all stood dressed in black narcissa and regulus with tear stained cheeks nymphadora trying her best to keep the kids entertained while the adults did there thing. 

"you remember the time james and mar got on top of griffindor tower and confessed there love of you two" remus dryly chuckled along with the rest of them. about two hours had past. the kids talked to there parents, regulus sirius and narcissa cried even more. remus and sirius held onto one another while lucius held narcissa.

He always knew since the day marlene mckinnon passed narcissa would never truly be able to recover from kissing the love of her life. the two shared a child together although the science behind it unknown, after many dna test, Rosalie malfoy (black-mckinnon) was marlene and narcissas daughter.

regulus sat there harry using his calf as a pillow, no one held him as he morned over james potter. he lost the absolute love of his life. he knew from the letter james written him when harry showed up at his doorstep, (more like living room) james was truly sorry for what happened with lily. he didn't regret harry he just regrets how it happened.

"draco you think mummies was pretty" rosalie asked. "dun no ask mummy" draco said with a shrug wiping off the dirt from marlene grave. "mummy was mummies pretty" she asked tugging on narcissa arm. nymphadora went red as she tried to get them to avert from asking questions such as those.

"she was the pretty's person in the world Rosie" narcissa smiled tapping the girls nose. "just like you. you have your mummies eyes" lucius added rubbing narcissas arm. 

about another hour passed. the three kids asleep on nymphadora who was now stuck in the same position. narcissa sat right infront of marlene's grave tears still streaming down her face.

"i would give anything in the world for you to be able to watch your daughter grow up. she acts just like you ya'know. same stupid smirk when she's up to something with draco. same birth mark behind her left ear just like you. i'll visit more with the kids i swear my love" she cried laying flowers down. her tears hitting the ground lucius came up behind her directing her back to the car.

"we'll prong happy twenty fourth birthday, merlin your old. lily have fun with him and the gray hairs they should be coming in right about now" sirius laughed standing beside remus who laughed. "we'll be back soon then later swear. see ya ginger see ya prongsie" remus smiled.

james: he finally called me prongsie

"come on prongsie jr let's get ice cream" sirius said harry jumped up into the air "chocolate ice cream" he asked clinging onto remus. "sounds like a plan"

"you think you'll be good here reg" andromeda asked regulus who stood standing by james and lily's grave. "yea i just.. can you babysit harry just for tonight i'll get him in the morning or you and ted and dora can stay in the guest rooms in my place you have my spare keys" regulus said

"of course i'll stay with harry, i'll take him to my place and give him back to you tomorrow afternoon. tonight seems like a night someone would want to be alone" andromeda said giving him a side hug
"he would be so proud of you i just know it" she whispered. "thank you andy" he said. she smiled letting go of regulus taking teds and going back to the house.

there regulus stood alone. tears in the brim of his eyes looking at the name engraved on the stone.

amazing and loving son friend father and lover

"this isn't fair" regulus muttered. cry. that's all he could do. sadness was the only emotion his body understood today on james potters birthday of all days. a day that was once a week long celebration was now a day that reminds regulus of another year without him.

he looked up at the sky as two tears escaped both eyes. he dropped down to the ground clutching onto his shoulders, his nails dug so fair in deep to his skin sure to leave marks. letting out the most heart reaching scream mix with choked up sobs.

"merlin why him why james of all people" he screamed. his breathing getting uneven. sobbing uncontrollably begging for james to return. eye blood shot hear breaking more and more at the thoughts of his lover gone. they say when your in a morning period it never last. when your in the dark you look for the light. but how can one look for the light when it was taken from your life. they say the pain will pass in time yet for regulus the pain only grew knowing james would never be able to watch his son grow up with his own eyes.

"i would do anything for another i love you that you can hear james. i can't do this anymore james, i can't raise harry on my own anymore i but i can't leave him ether it's not fair to him. merlin why you why did it have to be you" he cried harder.

maybe it was selfish, but how does one go on after someone who was your other half was taken away from you. someone who saved you from every bad aspect for your life and give you a reason to live be taken away from night to day. james never knew the answer and he always knew that if one day he truly did leave regulus alone he would have to give him another reason to keep on. that was harry.

even if regulus was on his knees begging to be with james by the next day he didn't mean it. no matter how much he would be in heart shattering pain every day without james, he got to watch harry grow up. regulus could feel as useless as possible but the second harry eyes fell onto him he knew harry loved him. harry loved his father.

by the time regulus had gotten home it's was well past night. he went up the stairs into harry's room to find if empty, he was at andromedas. there was no reason to turn on the baby monitor. there would be no little human promising regulus it was the last time he would sleep in his bed both knowing it was a lie.

he opened to ottoman at the foot of his bed filled with james's belongings. he pulled out a jumper that still smelled of James. he brought it to his chest as he got into bed. praying  he would dream of james again.