Luscious Man Series 1: Zaimon Luther Suarez

KABANATA 57

I look at the peaceful garden as the cold breeze blew my hair. I was looking at the scenery in their veranda when someone hugged me from behind. Just by smelling his scent I feel comfortable and feel safe. I leaned in his chest and feel his body's warmth. It gives me butterflies in my stomach as he hugged me tight from behind.

"Are you okay already? Already forgave yourself? Hmm?" He asked in a soft voice. His nose were touching my ear qhike he's kissing my hair languidly.

I smiled genuinely this time. "Yes. I'm okay now. I feel. . . relieved that. . . they didn't plant a hatred on me. I am now happy that they accept me as who I am." I glanced at him but because he's kissing my hair, I can't clearly see him.

"That's good to hear. I'm happy for you, baby. I'm so proud of you, because you surpass all of these. The pain that the past inflicted to you has not been a barrier to you from achieving self-forgiveness." His lips went down to my earlobe, then to my jaw, and went to kiss my lips.

Habang hinahalikan niya nang marahan ang aking labi ay nakangiti ako. Nakangiti ako sa sobrang saya na aking nararamdaman ngayon. He's been with me the whole time I'm talking to his family. He's been with me the whole time I feel like I'm breaking down. I confessed everything to his family. Candice were shocked to know that. . . I almost had a mental disorder. They were shocked because I went depressed and drive me to attempt suic*de. They're with their sympathy to me as they look at me with gentleness. While I'm telling them what I've been through the past years I cried the whole time. They cried, too. And apologise for what happened.

They don't have to. Wala naman silang kasalanan sa mga pinagdaanan ko. Gaya ng sinabi nila sa akin na wala akong kasalanan sa mga nangyari sa kanila at sa mga pinagdaanan nila.

"When I heard your past again, I don't want to let go of you anymore." he said huskily when he pulled out from the kiss. "Parang sa bawat araw na dumadaan at sa bawat araw na naiisip ko lahat ng pinagdaanan mo, mas lalo lang kitang minamahal. At ayaw na kitang pakawalan. Kahit ipagtulakan mo ulit ako." Napasinghap ako sa sinabi niya at kalauna'y napanguso at natawa nang bahagya.

"Really?" I asked teasingly that made him frowned at me.

His lips protruded as he look at me darkly. "So, nagbabalak kang ipagtulakan nga ulit ako?" Tuluyan na akong natawa sa sinabi niya at humarap sa kaniya para iyakap sa kaniyang batok ang aking mga braso habang tinitingala siyang seryoso lamang ang mukhang nakatingin sa akin.

"Why? Magpapatulak ka ba?" I smiled at him and tiptoe to kiss his lips but he's too tall! I just kissed his chin instead.

"No. Kung itulak mo man ako, gagawin ko ulit ang lahat para makasama ka." He crouch to kiss my lips.

Agad akong nagpaubaya sa kaniyang halik na noong una ay mababaw hanggang sa lumalim na. Ipinikit ko ang aking mga mata habang dinadama ang kaniyang paghalik. Sa bawat halik niya, kahit malalim ay marahan pa rin 'yon sa pakiramdam. Kaya sa bawat halik niya ay naliliyo ako at nadadala. Inianggolo niya pa ang kaniyang ulo para mas mahalikan pa ako nang malalim at mas maayos.

Hinihingal kaming pareho nang maghiwalay ang aming mga labi. Napangiti ako habang nakapikit pagkatapos ng halik. Hinalikan niya ang aking noo at hinagkan ako.

"I love you so much, Dane. I couldn't imagine loving someone else in this lifetime." Aniya habang humahalik pa nang marahan sa aking ulo.

"I love you, Zaimon." Bulong ko, tama lang para marinig niya.

He stilled for a while, processing what I have said not able to talk or react. Mas lumapad ang aking ngiti dahil doon. Ibinaon ko ang aking mukha sa kaniyang dibdib dahil medyo mahiya ako. Kahit sanay ako noon na sinasabi sa kaniya kung gaano ko siya kamahal, ibang-iba ang nararamdaman ko ngayon dahil matanda na kaming pareho. Mas alam na namin ang nararamdaman namin. We can now finally sort out our feelings, by just not telling it but by showing it also towards our actions.