We'll meet again Neferpitou x OC

Case file 6

I stared into the embers of the match that my godfather had given me.
As the first one started to fade out, I lit up a new one with my tiny fingers. Before I could enjoy the sight my father came and took the small pack of matches away and started to argue with Morgan.
While he was distracted I took the lighter I was given and set my dad's shoelaces on fire before crawling away.

I woke up with the feeling of someone scratching my head? I opened my eyes to see, nothing. I can't see... WHY CAN'T I SEE!?

"What's happening?" I started freaking out. I tried sitting up but I couldn't. Which made me freak out even more.

"Good morning" When I heard Pitou's voice, all of last night came rushing back to me. After a minute of struggling she took her arm off me.

"What's happening? Why can't I see?" I clawed at my face it was at that point I realized that I had hair in my face and that's why I couldn't see. 'She took my goddamn hat, now am I supposed to hold back my hair'

"You're so stupid it's funny" She laughed.

"What the fuck" I asked in surprise while pointing at the frozen block of ice with my dead friend inside of it. (Kitesicle)

"Your dead friend. Stupid" 'Smart-ass... hole'

"Why?" I cannot think of a single reason why he wasn't immediately fed to the Queen. "Wait, why are you wearing my hat? By the way, It doesn't it"

"Run." Neferpitou said, Dead Serious.

With a shaky voice, I asked, "What?"

"Runaway... from me" Pitou started to smile as she made her aura more murderous. I stood up and braced for the pain and nothing there was no pain my legs were fine.

"What the hell?" 'Why can I stand?' I squeezed my supposedly broken pinky to test how I'm doing.

"You're welcome. I'm so nice, but remember this I will break every bone in your body just as quick if you try to leave" 'Oooh nooo not every bone whhhaaaattt will I ever do? They'll just come back stronger' "Mine" Neferpitou took my sunglasses and put them on. "What? How?" She was confused about why I still had sunglasses on.

"Try as much as you want I'm keeping these glasses on" I said pissed off that she's trying to steal my outfit. "Don't you have a Queen to royally guard?"

"Pouf is on outdoor duty, if you listen you could probably hear him playing" Pitou explained while trying to poke my eyes.

"I ha-" Neferpitou interrupted my sentence by throwing my hat like a frisbee at my head. I didn't even bother catching it, I just let it hit me.

"What do you normally do in your everyday Jon?" She asked.

"Ya know I'm Actually surprised that you remember my name. What's my last name?" I questioned her with Half-Past Wicked. "
(I'm not saying "actually" cause you're a woman, I'm saying "actually" cause I'm an asshole)

"I ask the questions and it's Doe" Pitou responded.

"Clap, clap, clap, Wait to go you demolished my expectations" (Jon is saying clap)

"Come here" She beckoned me over with her finger. That made my stomach drop Quicker than anything else.
I got closer to her Step. By. Step. Until I was standing in front of her.

"Look at me" Even though She was a little taller than me, it felt like Pitou was towering over me with her presence. "If I'm keeping you cause I find you funny but when I tell you to do something you'll do it. The end" hearing her say that was pretty demoralizing. "Now I'm very bored, to the point where I'm Interested in hearing about your stupid human day-to-day life" At some point during her speech she pulled me down to the ground.

"I wake surrounded by animals" I said Sitting up.

Pitou pulled me closer "I don't like where this is going"

"I live with Several dogs, 1 Alligator, A turtle and two tortoises, an axolotl, an Orangutan, and a deer That's not even all of The animals" I miss my Fuzzy friends.

"Why do you have so many animals?" She asked taking off my hat and putting it back on me.

"I Foster them from babies then they just don't leave" I Happily explained.

"Do you live in the middle of a forest or something and do you have any cats?" 'I've got a fucking orangutan and she's asking about cats?'

I started taking out a cigarette "No, I live in the middle of a city. Why would I live in a forest?"

"No" Pitou took my cigarette and said "Answer my question and I'll give it back"

"I-" She interrupted me by booping my nose. "When I was young I did have a cat very he was friendly and cute but when I was maybe... 12? he was getting up there in years so one day when everyone was busy my baby sister killed him" I shifted the truth so I could get my cancer stick back.

"You're lying" Pitou was accusing me out of the blue.

Her accusation cut me completely off guard "What?"

She crawled on top of me and questioned "Tell me what you're hiding"

"Whoa. What is happening?" I asked confused by the strange turn things were taking.

"Why are you lying to me, Jon?" 'Ok so she has me pinned to the ground'

"Can you get off me" I'm Suuuuper uncomfortable with this whole situation. I used Half-Past Wicked to get out of this.

"Tell me!" Neferpitou slammed her fist on the ground right next to my head. 'I'm not giving her what she wants so I'm pretty much dead man. Mom Dad I'm sorry I didn't get to say "I fucking hate you" more. If I get out of this I'll fly home a piss on your graves 😭'

"Okay it was a hot summer day on my parent's farm with me and my family I had just gotten back from the lake nearby when my sister walked in holding our dead cat with a very happy smile on her face then she proceeded to go into every graphic detail of how she took used the rubber band from her slingshot to-" I said as quickly as a could before being interrupted.

"Stop lying!" At this point, Pitou was getting annoying.

'Plan C' (Plan 2 was lying) I used Abracadabra to Form a hand and Scratched her head. Her grip loosened almost immediately which was an opportunity to break free of her.
'You're fuckin crazy man and not the hot kind' I took back my cigarette.

(This is for all the men in the audience

This chart has never failed me(I am an 11 and a 6) men Keep in mind the rule of DSYDC Don't stick your dick in crazy)