We'll meet again Neferpitou x OC

Case file 7

"Lord Neferpitou hold on a second... isss that a human?" Two chimera ants had walked into the room.

"No, just ignore him" Neferpitou said trying to not get me eaten. I tried not to make eye contact with the penguin guy. 'I hate penguins... how is he a penguin this is the NGL not the Arctic?'

After they we're out of earshot I asked "Can I leave?"

"No" She replied while mixing random vile.

"I mean the room I wanna look around. I'm bored" I explained.

"I know, you would probably try to kill everyone and just leave" Neferpitou proceeded to take a sip from whatever she was mixing.

"Never in my life have I been so insulted" I over exaggerate.

"I asked Pouf to kill you if he ever saw you alone" Neferpitou warned. 'Good luck with that one buddy'

"Typically humans starve after two weeks without food I've been here for I don't even know how lo..." I explained.

Pitou glared at me because of my outburst "I think we have some animal carcasses in the preparation room"

"No, I'm a bi-guy" I tried explaining.
(I'm having so much trouble just typing this out because of how hard I'm laughing)

"What does that have to do with eating meat!?" Pitou shouted at me, slightly red faced.

"Calm down, you clearly misunderstood something. What I'm trying to say is I believe
Beef Is - Gross Unethical and Yucky. What were you thinking I meant" I explained more clearly. (Thank you Michael Girard Tyson)

"Never mind, why don't you eat meat?" 'Idk what I said made her uncomfortable so that's good'

I started on the usual lie I tell people. "I've fostered more animals than I can count. I couldn't eat anything that had a mother also, it's healthier"

"That's stupid but I understand your logic" Pitou said taking another drink from whatever she was mixing.

"Well?" I asked.

"Well what?" Pitou said having lost her train of thought.

"What we were just talking about" I tried reminding her.

"Oh yea, starve" She poured whatever she was drinking into a tube connected to Kites pod.

"What?" I said stunned by her answer.

Pitou then told me while mixing another vile of weird liquid. "I gave you a solution but you chose pride over survival like stupid human you are"

"I understand your logic but that's stupid" I rebuked. (Please tell me if I'm using that correctly(or don't)) "It's not about pride it's about a physical feeling of sickness" And it makes me vomit.

"It wouldn't have a face they come in little balls of meat" Pitou explained taking what I said way too literally.

"I don't mea... what the hell are you mixing?" I asked very confused about what she's been giving to my friend.

Pitou walked over to me grabbed my face and said, "Here" Before forcing me to drink whatever was in that vile.

"Oh god, what was that" 'Oh god, it tastes like grape jelly and mustard' I fell onto the ground and started to dry heaving.

"Here, let me help" Pitou said before kicking me in the stomach.

I tried sticking a finger in my throat to vomit but I couldn't because I haven't eaten in five days and because, I don't have a gag reflex. "What was that for?" (It's from drinking salt water)

"Kicking you or feeding that weird stuff" It alarmed me that Neferpitou called it "weird stuff".

"Yes" I responded.

"You freaking smart ass" Pitou kicked me in the stomach as I was trying to get up.

"Why did you do both?" I re-answering her question while I was getting up.

"You kept complaining about how hungry you are so I tried fixing your problem cause such I'm a good person" Pitou said metaphorically patting herself on the back.

"Careful, you don't want to hurt your arm" I smiled knowing that she would fall for my joke trap.

"Are you worried about me?" She asked.

"Sigh never mind" I faced palmed.

"Can I ask you something?" Pitou asked more than likely testing me.

"If I say no will you kill me?" I responded.
'I have a feeling I know what the answer will be'

"Maybe" 'I'll take her answer as a yes'

"Then no" I said.

"Why is it you so hilariously hard to sense your aura?" Her other question about questions was definitely a test just not the kind I thought it was.

"When you do something right people won't be sure you've done anything at all. I heard that somewhere" Pitou gave me her oh so famous death glare "In my line of work it's better to remain unseen and unsensed so doing something right means that no one knows I've done anything at all" (edit I don't like that line but I don't wanna rewrite it)

Pitou walked over to me I feel like she's going to do something bad. "Next time just tell me what I want to know, don't give me the run-around or there won't be another"

"That's hard to believe that when all you do is warn me that there is no next time Like a Bond villain" 'That definitely got her attention' (I'm calling your bluff pussy)

"You're right, actions do speak louder than words. What do you want me to do?" Neferpitou asked. She's just going to break some bones then fix them.

"If you really wanna do this whole song and dance again-" I stood up and said "You're going to need to catch me first"

"Why don't we make things interesting" She asked stealing my line. As soon as she got close enough I used a solid illusion clone to smash the shit out of Kite's pod.

"Oh no looks like you nee-" I started to say something but I was cut off.

"Shut up!" She yelled angrily. Pitou grabbed my jaw tight enough so that I couldn't breathe. I tried licking her hand but she wouldn't stop

(Ah knocking someone out, The best way to end a chapter)