Adopted by Stucky

Part 17- the messages

Warning- talk of suicide and attempted suicide

-a few weeks later-

You went to school and you hadn't got into another situation since flash, you were so popular, but you didn't really like it, you couldn't do anything normal, you were swarmed all the time asking for a photo and asking to come round, this was from people you didn't even know they just wanted to meet your dads and the avengers, you always turned them down.

Your phone:

Unknown: hey y/n
You: who is this?
Unknown: I know where you live

This freaked you out a little, but you played it out well

You: no shit, the whole world knows

You shook it off, someone at school probably got your phone number and tried to scare you, you kept getting messages like this, every day, but you didn't realise how much it was affecting you

-at the weekend-

You were woken by the sound of your phone

Different unknown: you're so ugly I don't know why Captain and the white wolf ever adopted you

A hot tear rolled down your face, you heard a knock at your door, you quickly wiped your eyes and opened your door it was your papa
"Morning hunny" you hugged him "you ok, sorry if I woke you"
"I'm fine papa" your phone pinged

Unknown: hello, didn't you get my message you're so ugly and fat I don't get why people even like you

"Who was that, sweetheart?" Papa asked oblivious
"Oh just a friend from school, it's not important" you held in your tears "so, what we doing today?" You said trying to change the subject
"Nothing much just wanted to see if you wanted to train with me this morning?" You nodded
Papa left and you got changed into some new gym gear that Nat bought you
You walked down to see dad and papa punching separate punching bags, because Tony likes to be excessive there was three more hooks in there so you went and hooked a bag up and wrapped your hands, Bucky taught you how, and started to punch... and punch... and punch letting all the anger you had, out on the bag, you didn't realise how much those messages had got to you
"Doll, I think you should stop, you've been punching for the last half an hour" you completely ignored him, you had zoned out thinking about the messages and how angry it made you, "doll? Is everything ok?" He asked concerned, you still didn't hear him
You were getting more and more angry and then you punched so hard it burst and fell on the floor snapping you out of your thoughts, you saw blood starting to come through the tape on you hands and you saw Dad and Steve looking at you concerned "I'm fine dad, honestly" you said, they didn't believe you for one second, they knew you had a history of mental health issues
"You sure, hunny, because it doesn't look like it" papa said, at this point you were really trying to hold in your tears, you just ran out of the training room and into your en-suite bathroom and burst into floods of tears, you looked down and saw your hands still wrapped in tape that was covered in blood, you peeled it off to show your red raw skin you winced as you cleaned it, you heard a knock but you didn't respond
"Doll, I'm coming in" dad walked in and saw you trying to clean your hands "please tell me what's wrong" he pleaded
You just shook your head and broke eye contact
He put fresh bandages on your knuckles and pulled you into a tight hug and don't let go for a good minute or so, this made you feel better "well you don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to, but just remember we are always here for you, let's go and get some breakfast shall we?" He said trying to change the mood  You nodded and walked downstairs to see all the avengers, you instantly put on a realistic but fake smile and changed your mood to try and mask how you were actually feeling, you grabbed a bowl and poured yourself some cereal sitting next to Nat, she instantly looked at your hands
"You ok y/n/n" she asked concerned, everyone heard and looked at you, your face went bright red from all the attention on you
"I'm fine, just got a bit angry at the punching bag this morning, don't ask why cause I have no clue myself" you knew exactly why you got angry but you didn't want to tell anyone, you laughed nervously, they all nodded suspiciously when you finished your breakfast you said you needed to go and 'change into some more comfortable clothes' and went to your bathroom, this time locking the door and putting on AC/DC to block out the noise
You shoved your fingers down your throat and made yourself throw up your breakfast, after this you freshened up and actually put on some comfy clothes
You did the same for lunch and dinner without anyone noticing

-Monday-

You woke up at 5:30am and got ready for school, you phone pinged

Unknown: your so fat you should just kill yourself

You really tried to brush this off and forget about it but it wasn't that easy, you were thinking that at school you would find it easier to cover the fact you weren't eating,
you packed your bag and went downstairs
"Hey hunny, what do you want for breakfast?" You looked at papa making it look like you were thinking for a second
"I'm not that hungry i think I'll just bring an apple or a banana or something like that" he nodded at you
Your phone beeped twice

Unknown: just kill yourself no will care

Someone else you didn't know: you are so fat an ugly your parents should be happy they gave you up... oh wait... they died

This really hit you "who was that doll?" Dad asked still oblivious
"Just a few friends asking when I was getting to school, I better be on my way" it wasn't that far to your school so you kissed your dads goodbye and walked to school crying the whole way, you thought to yourself 'if I get another one of those fucking messages I might as well kill myself, they are right no one will care' as the building came closer into view you wiped your tears and blew your nose to try and make it look as though you hadn't been crying, fortunately no one did notice

-a few weeks later-

The messages had continued up until recently You hadn't got one of those messages in a few days and thought they had stopped until  the beginning of the semester break
You were in the lounge chatting with all the avengers, you were engrossed in your phone so you weren't really listening to the conversations going on then a message popped up

Unknown: y/n no one likes you and no one ever will, just kill yourself now to stop everyone around you suffering 

You got really angry and chucked your phone as hard as you could against the wall, smashing it, causing everyone to look at you, but before anyone could say anything you ran up to the roof and stood on the edge

-back in the lounge-

*steve's POV

I could see y/n zoned out looking at her phone whilst we talked about life, Clint had come to visit and was talking about his kids and wife, all of a sudden I watch y/n get a message, she looked at it then threw her phone at the wall, but before we could say anything she had ran off
I got up and went over to her phone, it had smashed but it was still working,
I picked it up and my jaw dropped
"She's been getting death threats and she's being body shamed" i announced to everyone, Tony looked up
"JARVIS where is y/n?" He asked concerned
"She is on the roof sir" he replied everyone quickly got up and went straight to the roof

*your POV

You were on the roof contemplating jumping or not, soon you heard footsteps behind you
"Doll, papa saw the messages, please don't do it" you burst into tears just looking down at the cars below You could hear the sadness in his voice
"You've read the messages, no one would care, all of your lives would be better without me" you said with your voice breaking, soon all the avengers came up, Tony was in his suit and so was peter, ready for if you did jump
"Yes we would y/n, You make everyone's day when you walk into the room with your smile" Nat added
"Banner can help you, we will all help you" Tony said
You hadn't eaten in over a week and the exhaustion was starting to kick in, at this point you felt loved and don't want to jump but you felt so dizzy you couldn't move "Tony you might want to get ready to catch me, I don't want to jump anymore but I can't move, I'm gonna pass-" your legs gave way and you blacked out all you could hear was the screams of your parents and friends

Author here!
Hi just wanted to say, if anyone you know or if you are feeling like this talk to someone or if you are being bullied in any way shape or form, tell someone, do not suffer in silence, and it is never too late to tell someone
Hope your day goes great or if it is late at night I hope your day was good
God bless you all
Bye!