Adopted by Stucky

34- Hidden sadness

You and yelena's faces were both really red, and you were just looking at each other
"We've only just met!" You exclaimed
"Yea, but I can see the way you two look at each other, you'd make the perfect couple!" She said

"We are not continuing this conversation, I'm hungry, I'm getting food, do you want food yelena?" You said changing the subject

"Yes thank you y/n, I would love food, have you got Mac and cheese? Oh and I love it with hot sauce" yelena said
"Sure, I'll go and get it for you" you said walking out of the room

In the kitchen/dining room/living room

You walked into the kitchen, and it was only your dads, everyone else got called out on a mission and wouldn't be back for a few hours

You started to make the pasta and sauce, whilst you were cooking you dads started to talk
"So how's yelena?" Papa said
"Great, she's doing great, it's very awkward in there" you confessed
"That's good, why is it awkward? Doll" dad asked
"Nat thinks that I have the hots for her, and visa versa" you said
"Well, do you?" Dad questioned suspiciously

"Idk, I mean she is hot but idk we've only just met" you confessed whilst plating up the pasta and grabbing the hot sauce, and also serving yourself some, you weren't a fan of hot sauce so you just had normal Mac and cheese
"Well if you like her, you like her"  dad said
"Wait your not going to question that I like girls" you asked
"No of course not, silly, we're gay ourselves, duh" dad said

You face palmed

"I'm so stupid, anywho, I'm going to bring yelena her food, and eat mine as well" you said as you walked off you heard a "have fun, but not to much fun!" Down the hall you rolled your eyes,

When you got to her room, only Bruce was in there
"Hi y/n/n" she called, Bruce was checking her leg
"Hey I brought you your food, sorry it took so long, where's Nat?" You asked
"Don't worry about it, she and Wanda went somewhere, I can't remember exactly but, I'm to hungry to care at this moment in time" she said and you both started laughing

"Hey Bruce"
"Hi y/n" he called
"You know you can call me y/n/n like most of the avengers do? Right?" You asked
"Yea, yea, but I just see your file so often and it says y/n I'm just used to it" he said forgetting that yelena was there and didn't know anything about your past or mental health, she looked very concerned
"Don't worry, I'm just very clumsy and have a history of getting injured very easily" you explained she just nodded suspiciously, she knew you weren't telling her everything but she wasn't going to push, which you were very happy about, you both sat in comfortable silence as you ate your lunch, but it was more like a late lunch it was 3:30 in the afternoon, Bruce just worked silently, taking her blood and stuff and checking her shoulder to make sure it was staying infection free

"Umm y/n, once you've finished your lunch/early dinner, can I see you in my lab please?" Bruce asked
"Yup sure" you said with a mouthful of food
"Everything ok?" Yelena asked
"Yea, I'm just anaemic so he has some pills to give me, well I better get going, get well soon Yelena" you said with your last bite of food left in your mouth

"Bye cutie" she said with a smirk on her face, you looked at her and laughed

You went up to Bruce's lab and saw Bruce, papa and dad. You sighed and went to turn on your heels but that didn't work, because you were caught before you even got in the room
"кукла, не надо" dad said sternly through the door, you grunted to yourself and walked through the door (doll, don't)
"Why didn't you tell us about you not feeling good?" Papa said
"Do you mean, the fact I'm anaemic?" You questioned his poor choice of words, he nodded "dads" you started addressing them both "it's nothing it's just an iron deficiency I'm fine, I just get a bit dizzy when I stand up sometimes" you said sorta lying but also not completely "and Bruce is gonna give me pills anyway" you said shrugging them both off

"Still we would rather you told us" dad said still a little annoyed
"Yes I know, I just find it like I have so much wrong with me, that I'm just a burden and you don't need anything else to worry about so I don't tell you" you explained
They both came over and bent down to your level

"Honey, you can come to us with anything, your not a burden and your our daughter, it's our responsibility to worry about you" papa explained they both stood up and hugged you
"Ok so y/n I want you to come to the lab twice a day, for your meds, once in the morning and once in the evening, I'm normally in here at 6 but if I'm not just write a note, we can start tomorrow" Bruce explained
"Ok, imma go to my room" you stated
"Ok doll, you gonna be ok up there on your own?" He asked
"Ye I'll be fine dad, don't worry" you were lying through your teeth

In your room:

You got in your room and locked the door
"JARVIS make sure no one comes in, and I mean no one" you instructed
"Yes, y/n" Jarvis said over the speakers
You got your blades and got to work, creating loads of 1 inch cuts on your arm, probably 20 in total
Some were deep enough to need stitches, but do you care? No, not right now, you couldn't explain why you were doing this to yourself and why you were feeling like this, but you didn't need a reason, you sat there just crying, getting everything out
Once you were done you composed yourself and dressed and cleaned yourself up
You went to do some singing, recently you had taught yourself how to play the guitar, you weren't great at it, but you knew the basics and could play most songs, the songs you would play and sing, explained how you were and are feeling, like today you were singing hey little girl by Sophie Marie

I'm all choked up
I cannot talk
I got a fucked up brain
Fucked up thoughts
I thought I was okay
But then I guess not
Hope you know that this is your fault

I want you to feel bad when you go to sleep
I hope you're sad when you remember me
And feel bad for all you did to me
I hope you lie there in your misery

Hey little girl
You'll never believe
There's a ghost inside of you
But it's hidden too deep

Hey little girl
You'll never imagine
When you get a little older
You'll get abandoned

Hey little girl
You know smoking kills
You don't really care
'Cause you love how it feels

Hey little girl
You're falling apart
Don't really care
'Cause they broke your heart

After a few more sad songs, you just stayed in your bedroom for the rest of the day, and wasn't hungry enough for dinner, your dads came in to check on you at around 10ish and came and got into bed and slept, with you in their arms, like the old times

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Hey lovelies just a reminder to give your eyes a break, get a drink and EAT, your body can't survive without food, listen to your body, you deserve it
You got this 😘
I love you all 3000 xxx
-L-