I am now lying on my bed habang sapo-sapo ang dibdib na kanina pa hindi mapakali dahil sa nakakabinging pagtibok nito. What is happening to me? Every time I close my eyes, I could see Sean's image. He's been popping up in my mind and it really bothers me. Napapansin kong lately I am always looking for his presence every time na hindi siya nagpaparamdam. I can't wait to see him again even when he just left katulad kanina.
After we finished eating at naikwento kila mommy ang pagka-grant ng scholarship ko, after that ay nagpaalam na ako para umakyat at magpahinga sa room ko pero kanina pa akong nakahiga at hindi makatulog. Kanina pa ako pabali-balikwas sa bed ko. I'm really confused sa nararamdaman ko towards him. What if I'm already falling in love with him? Natatakot akong hindi ko mapanghahawakan ang commitment na binitawan ko sa sarili ko.
Bumangon ako to drink a milk. I really wanted to sleep, to stop thinking about him.
Nagising ako dahil sa malakas na tawanang nagmumula sa sala. I could hear Mommy and Daddy's laughter together with another familiar voice. Bumangon ako at sinilip sila sa sala.
Muntik na akong mapatakbo pabalik sa kwarto ng makita kung sino ang kausap nila Mommy. It was Sean.
But before I could do anything ay nakita na ako ni Mommy. "O anak gising ka na pala"
Napalingon si Daddy at Sean sa akin. Bahagyang napangiti si Sean ng makita ang itsura ko. I was only wearing a pajama and my hair were messy. Wala pa akong hilamos or anything.
Binigyan ko sila ng isang tipid at plastic na ngiti sabay talikod at mabagal na patakbong pumasok pabalik ng kwarto.
Napatalukbong ako ng kumot nang makabalik ako sa kwarto. Hiyang hiya ako with Sean. I was very embarrassed to him looking me like this.
Why is he here at home now? Is he really serious about being my personal driver?
Moments later, mommy entered the room.
"Bakit hindi ka pa nagliligpit?"
"Po?"
"Magligpit ka na para pumasok at naghihintay si Sean"
"let him wait. Hindi ko naman siya inutusang sunduin ako. Apaka niya" Sabi ko sabay tumayo at nakangusong tinungo ang banyo para maligo.
Mommy prepared my favorite breakfast. Fried rice matched with fried egg and bacon.
Sean is in dining too. What the? Dito rin ba siya kasabay ko mag-aagahan? Ang epal naman!
"Come here sweetie, Kumain ka na" aya sa akin ni Daddy.
Lumapit na rin ako sa hapag. Ayaw ko na mag-inarte. Besides, I'm hungry.
Nginitian pa ako ni Sean saka sumandok ng food sa lamesa. I was struck for a moment with those smiles. My heart began to pound again.
Napalunok ako saka sumandok na rin ng pagkain. Tahimik lang ako at hindi umimik.
It's not because I ate with Sean that's why I never enjoyed my food. It's because I'm very confused with my feelings, as if there's something squeezing my chest. These past few days, my heart has been pounding erratically, and I've been spacing out all day. I can't think straight. When I'm with Sean katulad ngayon, my face flushes involuntarily and my mood goes from excited to suddenly depressed while he keeps appearing in my dreams.
"Anak okay ka lang?"
"Po?"
"Namumula ka" puna ni Mommy nang mapansin ang pisnge ko. I then noticed Sean stopped eating and looked at me.
BINABASA MO ANG
Still You
RomanceFinance manager Kianna Gaiyel works for a well-known jewelry business in South Korea. Growing up, she only focused on her studies and her desire to recover all of her family's assets, particularly their property, which had been removed from the bank...