How We Broke Up

30

THEN

Ronald came home early that Friday when he heard about what happened to Ro. It has been weeks since what happened with Thomas, she was back from her old self. She went silent for most of their dinner and her mom felt that something is going on, but she didn't pry.

Each day that passes, Robert is distressed and worried about her condition, so he called their older brother to tell him about the situation.

At the present, it's Friday. Around four in the afternoon when Ronald came. Robert and their mom are waiting by the living area.

"What happened?" their mom walks towards Ronald and hugged him tightly. As soon as she felt his sons' warm embrace, she broke down.

Robert bows down his head to prevent himself from breaking down his wall. He knew he needed to be strong.

"Ro told mom about Thomas. They broke up." Ronald looked at him as if saying they both know there's something to dig from there.

"I asked her if she was okay, and of course she would say yes but...I know better."

"She's not fine. Deep down here," she pointed at her chest. "I always know if you all are not."

"I wanted to own up your pains, sufferings, too bad I cannot." Ronald guided her mom to sit at the chair near them.

"Is it my fault? Something has been bothering her but I didn't do anything-

"No mom, no. It's no ones. She needs help, only if she's willing mom."

Robert agreed, "Yeah mom. But we'll try to talk to her."

Then, they told their mom about what happened during the foundation week. Ronald admitted that they must have said it but instead they hid the truth with their mom. When they visited her campus, they had a talk with Ro's friend and that's how they found out how she is treated by her schoolmates.

No one may saw the aftermath of their words because it's too subtle. Still, it affected her abruptly. It's like a one ball after another ball and another ball juggle up in the air, which in the end causing to lose control into making it balance because too much is too hard. Ro can't keep tossing every word she received. The end goal will always cause her disruption in balancing her mental state.

They are no professionals that's why they need to seek one for Ro.

When Ro went home, she just stood up in the doorway. Unable to move because, why are they here? Did I do something bad?

Their mom was the one who walks up first. She approached her and gently moves her daughter for a tight yet warm grip. Ro lose herself and broke down in her mother's arms. Ronald and Robert went up to comfort the first women in their life.

There are no words spilled in that living area, but the presence of their love, support, and empathy overpowers the silence of the room.

Ro never felt this warmth feeling for years. She was thankful she no longer needs to talk for them to know what she feels and needs.

Later that night, Ro and her mom had a heart-to-heart session. The night was filled with too much emotions. They were both ecstatic with their bond. Her mom felt the agony her daughter was feeling when she told her again that she and Thomas broke up. No one learned about what really cause their break up. And at the end, both of them broke down when she told her mom how she was feeling for the past years.

Ro always feel like she need to be perfect for them to accept her. That's the same reason why she pressured herself to always plan ahead. She wanted for herself to be as successful as she can be in the future to make everyone happy, especially her mom.

She also admitted she hates their dinner every night because she constantly had the feeling of being okay, being pressured to be fine.

Ro apologized for shutting people down when bad things occurred. She's not exactly a great bearer of hard pill truths. Even the constant people she has from those times when she doesn't recognize what friendship is, are lost.

Is it bad to allow yourself to savor the pain of accepting what you can't change? I want this for myself, this pain, only mine as it's the only thing left that I can say I truly own.

"You can't own the pain forever. Let mom hug you until you feel better. Let mom kiss your pain away. Anything that I could do to make my daughter not suffer anymore. Let me..."

"For now, we will wait for you. Until then, own it up as much as you want. Whenever you're ready, we'll be here."

No matter how hard it is to let go, it is vital to keep yourself sane. Above all, when you never really had it. Holding onto him wouldn't be a wise decision.

Admitting our hands fits so well and my skin still yearning for your lips, I had to ease my mind and learn to accept that my hand will no longer hold you, my skin will no longer have to wait for you, and I no longer have to keep the fire burning, for us.

I hope you are happier, even without me.