Francesca Romano

Chapter 7 | Why?

"Why?" That seems to be everyone's favorite question. Why? I don't understand how that could answer everything but at the same time I do. "Why? Why did you become a doctor Francesca?" How do I answer? I get asked that everywhere I go. Why?

I don't know why, but I do. I became a doctor to save lives, right? No that's not right. I became a doctor because of the thrill. No, that's not right either. I know the reason I became a doctor I just could never say it out loud. I'd get call crazy, cold, mean, and ruthless.

As a stood in this dark room with only one light that flashed on my patient's head that was cut open, allowing me to see their Brain. I felt my heart sore. No noise, no movement, just us two. Though there was other people in the room with me I made sure they all knew if there was one sound they would get kicked out. Looking at this beautiful tumor, It was life or death. I took a deep breath before moving the scalpel deeper making my incision wider.

God I felt like I could breath again. Yet again I saved someone's life. It was bittersweet, I'd have to tell the family that he survived. The room that was once silence was filled with cheers and applause.
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"Your son pulled through. You'll be able to see him in about 30 minutes." I felt stiff as the happy parents hugged me. I managed to hug back and pull a smile on my face but it didn't last long. I stepped away from them and pulled my scrub cap off.

I dragged my feet and made it to the on-call room I had dropped my stuff into this morning and pulled, my phone out of my bag. I sat on the floor crossing my legs, 12:36 am. My eyes dropped to the message Beverly sent two hours ago. "Won't be home tonight, love you."

An empty house is just what I wanted right now. The door opened and I saw Jocelyn poke her head through. I patted in from of me where she could sit with a weak smile. She came in closing the door behind her and sat in front of me on the floor. She was always working late, if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have made it four years in this place.

I met her on my 17th birthday when I spent it at the mall with an old friend, Avery. We clicked immediately and when I turned 18 she helped me pick this hospital up from the dirt. We're the same age but she married young, always teased her about it. We don't talk much if it isn't about work but I appreciate her so much.

"What's wrong? Lost a patient?" She questioned "Nope. Their all alive." I said putting my phone down. "So?" She asked again. "No idea." I was probably just tired. I went into my bag to get gum but a piece of paper fell out when I pulled my hand.

I picked up the folded piece of paper and looked inside to see a number written down in decent hand writing. It took me a minute but I then remembered who it was from. "What this?" Jocelyn pulled the paper out of my hand and read the number out loud.

"Can you shut up? I'm not even going to use it." I rolled my eyes at her. "And why not?" She furrowed her eyebrows at me, almost mad I said it. "Too busy for a guy in my life." I shrugged. "Your sitting on the floor doing nothing but chewing gum." She took my phone that was beside me and stood up as I tried to grab it from her.

Refusing to get up and chase after her I sighed putting my face in my hands. Her pager buzzed and lit up causing me too look up. After typing something she gave me my phone and the paper before blowing a kiss and rushing out.

She had texted Reid, though I doubt he remembered who I was. I was going to delete it but my pager rang uncontrollably and never stopped. It was an emergency trauma that was 2 minutes out. I put my phone back in my bag and ran downstairs to the emergency room.

Many gurneys were pulling through the door covered in blood. It was mostly all men besides one woman. My heart dropped as I recognized one of the faces though it was covered in blood.

He was laid out, his chest rising and falling quickly. I ran over to him opening his eyes making sure he was conscious. A smirk pulled at his lips and he turned his head to look at me. "Did I not tell you I'd see you again?" His voice was raspy and uncontrolled. I ignored him and ripped through all the black material he was wearing.

I then noticed they all were wearing All black. Once I pulled all clothes off of his top half I noticed A large wound that was just gushing out dark red blood. How was he still awake and talking? I tried moving to hold down the wound but i wasn't able to apply enough pressure.

The nurses that were surrounding us helped me move his gurney to the OR. We moved to fast for me to even try and keep pressure on that big of a wound. Fuck it.

I got on top of him and used both of the hands to push down firmly and finally his blood flow slowed down. Though it looked like he was about to pass out with his eyes slightly shut he managed to say something very lowly, I couldn't hear.

His injuries had nothing to do with his neck up so this wouldn't be my surgery but someone else's. I felt a pit in my stomach knowing I wouldn't be me operating.